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Thread: Caught Between Two Friends?

  1. Fresh Newbie
    COGirl0321's Avatar
    COGirl0321 is offline
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    May 2016

    Sad Caught Between Two Friends?

    So I am in a weird situation. My friend who is also a military spouse recently has been going through things with her husband-possible separation. I could feel something was off, she was distancing herself from me and started wanting to go out and drink all the time. Now that her husband and her are in a rough spot, she has been drinking more and more, trying to ignore the situation.

    Another friend from my home town is coming to visit me. She is my best friend and we have been close for 10+ years. I haven't seen her since I moved with my husband, which was almost 2 years ago and we moved very far away. I am so excited to see her and we are planning on traveling, doing a mini road trip.

    I told my friend who lives here, that my best friend from my home town is visiting and that we're traveling. She said she wants to come with on our trip and that she needs to get out of her house. She also asked if my friend drinks and likes to party too-which she doesn't typically. We haven't decided where to go yet anyways so I told her we weren't officially sure.

    I feel so bad because I know she's going through a rough time. Is it bad of me to only want to spend time with my home town friend? She's coming from very far to visit me so I would think it would be rude to her to add other people to go with us. But then on the other hand I might hurt my friend who's going through a hard time and seems in a depressive state.

    I'm not sure what to do as I really just want to spend time with my home town friend...

    Any advice?? Thank you to any one who can help!
  2. One does not simply Ewok into Endor
    germy's Avatar
    germy is offline
    One does not simply Ewok into Endor
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    May 2013

    That is a tough position to be in and I don't think it is bad of you to want to spend time with your friend that is traveling to come see you. That in and of itself speaks volumes because I only have ONE friend that has ever done that. I will move mountains to spend time with her too. My suggestion would be to explain it to your friend that's there with you exactly how you explained it to us. That you want to spend time with your bestie from back home and then add that the two of you can do your own girls trip at a different time.

    <3 Anthiea <3 KittenMittens <3
  3. Senior Member
    Medic2Doula's Avatar
    Medic2Doula is offline
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    Mar 2017
    San Diego, CA
    I agree with Germy. If I flew out to see a friend and they invited someone else on our trip, I would feel upset. I hope you find the words to say this eloquently.

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