Military Significant Others and Spouse Support - MilitarySOS.com
Results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: Venue vs. Backyard Wedding?

  1. MilitarySOS Jewel
    Love7's Avatar
    Love7 is offline
    MilitarySOS Jewel
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Location
    CT
    Posts
    1,617

    #1

    Venue vs. Backyard Wedding?

    Advertisements
    I am struggling to make a decision.

    Here are my options
    1. Wedding ceremony/reception at a pretty venue - that will cost me and DF 10k+ (honeymoon not included)
    2. Small ceremony with just parents/siblings followed by a backyard party at my moms with all the family/friends

    I cant seem to pull the trigger and decide, and at this point I need to make a decision and keep it moving!!

    I am also in a very hectic/stressful time of life where I am doing school/work/getting ready for deployment/Christmas. I am considering quitting my job early next year (it may become necessary) in order to accelerate my school and the thought of living off one income and also planning a 10k wedding sounds super stressful. I guess I cant tell if it is just the stress that is deterring me from option 1. or if I genuinely don't care for that kind of wedding. I overthink everything UGH

    Money is not the only factor, but it is a huge one. I am the type of person to spend money on the things I really want, but I cannot decide if I really want a big wedding at a venue or not. I can, in theory, afford to have the venue wedding, but do I want all the stress and to spend all the $.

    I'm scared of regret. Either I'll regret spending 10k on one day, or I'll regret not having the "traditional" wedding

    Things about a wedding that are important to me:
    -A beautiful dress
    -Walking down an aisle to an excited fiance
    -Gorgeous pictures of me and my husband to be
    -Saying vows in front of our parents and siblings
    -Dancing the night away with more family/friends to celebrate our love
    -First dance
    -Yummy food/alcohol

    Things that are not important to me:
    -Beautifully decorated venue/hall (I am not creative and I could care less about décor or beautiful "Welcome" signs and seating charts
    -Centerpieces/floral arrangements
    -Giant wedding cake (DF and I hate cake)

    Help me! Tell me what to do people!
  2. The name says it all!
    ALil2Naughty's Avatar
    ALil2Naughty is offline
    The name says it all!
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Loki's chambers
    Posts
    26,355

    #2
    Quote Originally Posted by Love7 View Post
    I am struggling to make a decision.

    Here are my options
    1. Wedding ceremony/reception at a pretty venue - that will cost me and DF 10k+ (honeymoon not included)
    2. Small ceremony with just parents/siblings followed by a backyard party at my moms with all the family/friends

    I cant seem to pull the trigger and decide, and at this point I need to make a decision and keep it moving!!

    I am also in a very hectic/stressful time of life where I am doing school/work/getting ready for deployment/Christmas. I am considering quitting my job early next year (it may become necessary) in order to accelerate my school and the thought of living off one income and also planning a 10k wedding sounds super stressful. I guess I cant tell if it is just the stress that is deterring me from option 1. or if I genuinely don't care for that kind of wedding. I overthink everything UGH

    Money is not the only factor, but it is a huge one. I am the type of person to spend money on the things I really want, but I cannot decide if I really want a big wedding at a venue or not. I can, in theory, afford to have the venue wedding, but do I want all the stress and to spend all the $.

    I'm scared of regret. Either I'll regret spending 10k on one day, or I'll regret not having the "traditional" wedding

    Things about a wedding that are important to me:
    -A beautiful dress
    -Walking down an aisle to an excited fiance
    -Gorgeous pictures of me and my husband to be
    -Saying vows in front of our parents and siblings
    -Dancing the night away with more family/friends to celebrate our love
    -First dance
    -Yummy food/alcohol

    Things that are not important to me:
    -Beautifully decorated venue/hall (I am not creative and I could care less about décor or beautiful "Welcome" signs and seating charts
    -Centerpieces/floral arrangements

    -Giant wedding cake (DF and I hate cake)

    Help me! Tell me what to do people!
    I think you answered your own question, hon. If what really matters to you is declaring your love in front of your parents and siblings, why waste money on a fancy location when the back yard will do just fine. You can dance any where, you can still have that beautiful gown, you can still have beautiful pictures taken in the back yard. You just won't have to deal with the added expense of the fancy location, floral arrangements, etc. Dh and I got married at city hall. I've never been a woman who wanted that big fancy wedding with all the bells and whistles, though. What does your heart tell you? I think that's all you need to hear. I hope you figure out what you want, hon.

    DH: Thank you. ME: For what, babe? DH: For being you.




  3. MilitarySOS Jewel
    Love7's Avatar
    Love7 is offline
    MilitarySOS Jewel
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Location
    CT
    Posts
    1,617

    #3
    Quote Originally Posted by ALil2Naughty View Post
    I think you answered your own question, hon. If what really matters to you is declaring your love in front of your parents and siblings, why waste money on a fancy location when the back yard will do just fine. You can dance any where, you can still have that beautiful gown, you can still have beautiful pictures taken in the back yard. You just won't have to deal with the added expense of the fancy location, floral arrangements, etc. Dh and I got married at city hall. I've never been a woman who wanted that big fancy wedding with all the bells and whistles, though. What does your heart tell you? I think that's all you need to hear. I hope you figure out what you want, hon.
    Thanks for your response, and you're so right!!
    I talked more with DF and my mom last night and we decided to do the backyard party!! And, I honestly feel so relieved and much more excited now. I'll get everything I want, including a honeymoon which I'm ecstatic over LOL. I've been telling my friends and family about the change and everyone is also excited and supportive, so that makes me feel even better.

    I feel like I've been kind of a drama queen about figuring this out LOL, I was honestly annoying myself trying to come up with a decision. But I'm SO SO happy now!
  4. La vie boheme
    Hope's Avatar
    Hope is offline
    La vie boheme
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    NC
    Posts
    29,058

    #4
    I bet it will be a beautiful, intimate backyard ceremony. Congratulations!

    Let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth. - 1 John 3:18
  5. The name says it all!
    ALil2Naughty's Avatar
    ALil2Naughty is offline
    The name says it all!
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Loki's chambers
    Posts
    26,355

    #5
    It will be gorgeous! I'm so glad you're getting the ceremony you want.

    DH: Thank you. ME: For what, babe? DH: For being you.




  6. MilitarySOS Jewel
    Carolina's Avatar
    Carolina is offline
    MilitarySOS Jewel
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    3,641


    #6
    For minimal money and some help you can turn a backyard into the venue of your dreams! I'm glad you decided to go with what you are comfortable with. Spending 10k on something I didn't know if I wanted when some major life changes are about to take place would stress me out too.
  7. Wine-o
    brahette's Avatar
    brahette is offline
    Wine-o
    Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Location
    DC
    Posts
    2,792
    #7
    This is one of my all-time favorite backyard weddings, they've got a ton of good tips that may help!
    https://www.younghouselove.com/our-backyard-wedding/
    ~Becca~


  8. MilitarySOS Jewel
    Love7's Avatar
    Love7 is offline
    MilitarySOS Jewel
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Location
    CT
    Posts
    1,617

    #8
    Thanks All for the input and support

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •