Am I alone in this?

[jc141620]

Hello Everyone,

I recently got engaged and started working on wedding preparations because the way my fiancé was talking he wanted to get married before he deployed in January 2011. Well now he is acting like he wants to get married after he comes back. He keeps asking me for what I want but I am hesitant to tell him because if I tell him that I want to get married in December 2010 he will agree. He will decide whatever I want and I don't want that. I am so lost and confused I need some help or advice. Please Help.


My Fiancé is at Fort Knox, KY and I am in Alabama.

[Am]

He told you what he wants. You tell him what you want. Then go from there. Talk about it with each other and both have open minds.

For us, waiting until after was important. It's a stressful thing that changes both of you and it's not always for the better. It definitely empowering and reassuring when you make it through a deployment together.

Whatever you decide, communication is key. And that starts with telling him what you want.

[Tiffy]

Originally Posted by CarolinaHokie He told you what he wants. You tell him what you want. Then go from there. Talk about it with each other and both have open minds. For us, waiting until after was important. It's a stressful thing that changes both of you and it's not always for the better. It definitely empowering and reassuring when you make it through a deployment together. Whatever you decide, communication is key. And that starts with telling him what you want.

This is great advice! Don't be scared to tell him how you feel and what you want.

ps: I'm moving to Alabama in a few months (Birmingham). Where do you live?

[jenny_lea1787]

I agree with asking him what he wants first, then tell him what you want. This way he doesn't just agree with you, like you think he might. We are getting married after basic, but its just something we both knew we wanted to do.

[Kt-did]

Have you been through a deployment with him yet? If not, I could understand his hesitation to a certain degree. If you have, then maybe you should ask him 'why' he wants to wait until after. Maybe there is a valid reason to his choice here?