for those with a dad & step dad

[AML7609]

for those of you that have a dad and a step dad and are close to both, how did you incorporate both?

my step dad has been in my life since i was 3 and i feel like when i walk down the isle, i should have both my dad and step dad walk me. however, i dont know how my dad will take it. and i dont know what to do.

any suggestions?

[coloradokitkat]

That's a tough one. My step dad has been in my life since I was 7. My mom doesn't work so he brings in all the money and has always taken care of me and my brother as if we were his own. I never lived with my dad, my step mom was a heinous *****, but I am still very close to him. I am very close to both. I guess maybe just sit your dad down and talk to him about it. He will understand why you want to talk about it because he knows that your stepdad is important to you too. Maybe have your step dad walk you halfway down the aisle to your dad and then your dad walk you down to the altar (or where ever) to your husband

[Am]

I'm not close with my step-dad. I'm really close to my dad. So, this isn't an issue for me but I hope you can find something you're all happy with.

What about your step-dad walking you for the first part and then giving you to your real dad halfway down the aisle (or vice versa) and then your dad giving you away?

[SemperFiWife]

I haven't talked to my real dad in...10 years or so. So I am not close to him but my step dad he is my dad. I had my brother walk me down the isle and my dad married us.

I think it would be fine to have them both walk you down the isle.

[SemperFiWife]

Originally Posted by CarolinaHokie I'm not close with my step-dad. I'm really close to my dad. So, this isn't an issue for me but I hope you can find something you're all happy with. What about your step-dad walking you for the first part and then giving you to your real dad halfway down the aisle (or vice versa) and then your dad giving you away?

Oh thats a good idea too.

[Am]

Originally Posted by coloradokitkat That's a tough one. My step dad has been in my life since I was 7. My mom doesn't work so he brings in all the money and has always taken care of me and my brother as if we were his own. I never lived with my dad, my step mom was a heinous *****, but I am still very close to him. I am very close to both. I guess maybe just sit your dad down and talk to him about it. He will understand why you want to talk about it because he knows that your stepdad is important to you too. Maybe have your step dad walk you halfway down the aisle to your dad and then your dad walk you down to the altar (or where ever) to your husband

Totally copped your idea by accident. I didn't see it until after mine.

I really think it's the best, least offensive way. You get to involve both but the real dad gets the bigger part. To my dad, at least, that would be important. I think he'd be understanding of involving someone else but the actual giving away, I don't think he'd appreciate missing out on or sharing.

[Dittle7308]

I would have both walk you down the isle. Your dad cares about you and he should understand your decision. If he doesn't then he will have to get over it. Its your wedding not anyone else's so do what you want. It might hurt some people's feelings but like I said its YOUR wedding.

[AML7609]

Originally Posted by coloradokitkat That's a tough one. My step dad has been in my life since I was 7. My mom doesn't work so he brings in all the money and has always taken care of me and my brother as if we were his own. I never lived with my dad, my step mom was a heinous *****, but I am still very close to him. I am very close to both. I guess maybe just sit your dad down and talk to him about it. He will understand why you want to talk about it because he knows that your stepdad is important to you too. Maybe have your step dad walk you halfway down the aisle to your dad and then your dad walk you down to the altar (or where ever) to your husband

thats pretty much how it was for most of my childhood. in a way i feel like my step dad has dealt with more crap because he lived with me and saw me so much more. he always went to more of my sporting events and school activities and such but ive always gotten along with my dad. my mom suggested the 1/2 way thing too.

Originally Posted by Dittle7308 I would have both walk you down the isle. Your dad cares about you and he should understand your decision. If he doesn't then he will have to get over it. Its your wedding not anyone else's so do what you want. It might hurt some people's feelings but like I said its YOUR wedding.

i think im going to have them both walk me down. and tell my dad he can either get over it or not walk me at all. my dad and step dad get along so hopefully it all works out


thanks for your input ladies.

[Jenn026]

Originally Posted by CarolinaHokie I'm not close with my step-dad. I'm really close to my dad. So, this isn't an issue for me but I hope you can find something you're all happy with. What about your step-dad walking you for the first part and then giving you to your real dad halfway down the aisle (or vice versa) and then your dad giving you away?

We ended up doing a JOP, but if we had done a big wedding ceremony we were going to have my dad walk me 1/2 way (he was the primary man in my life the first few years) than my step-dad meet us in the middle and walk me the rest of the way (He supported me and is like a father to me since he entered my life) but when the pastor (or JOP or whatever) asked who gives this woman away my dad would have said "Kim (my step-mom) and I do" And my step-dad would have said "Her mother and I do".

[Mrz. Robinson]

Im not close with my step-dad but If I was I would have on walk me down and one give me away. Just so neither one would feel like they are left out