How did you decide on a ceremony? - Weddings

_shortie_ · 10-23-2009, 12:08 AM

My parents are very religous and want us to get married in a church, but my DB and I are tight on cash and don't really want a big wedding. He thinks a justice of the peace would be fine, but I can't decide if thats what I really want.

How did you decide what to have? pro's cons?

katiedelta3 · 10-23-2009, 12:11 AM

We knew we wanted a big wedding, it wasn't a decision.

However, the ceremony isn't what is expensive about most big weddings. You can get married in a church, don't compromise what you want and settle, you'll regret it in the future. You can have a small church ceremony without a reception (just go out to eat with people after or something if you want to celebrate) or with a backyard cook out, something along those lines.

CubLub63 · 10-23-2009, 12:14 AM

We decided to have a pastor from a non-denominational church do our ceremony. DH and I have our beliefs, but that's all they are. We're not very religious and our families are from different religions. It was the best for us because it was the most neutral. There were no cons to me. The pros were of course that it allowed us all to meet in the middle. Good luck!

sorraia · 10-23-2009, 12:14 AM

We got married in our church for religious reasons. I forget exaclty how many people we had, but I think it was around 80. We tried to keep things small and simple, and pretty much succeeded.

Am · 10-23-2009, 12:16 AM

We both wanted a big wedding so that was easy.

We're also both religious but wanted a beach wedding. We ultimately decided on a beach wedding with a preacher. I mean, how much closer to God can you be than outside in the open.

Would a simple outdoor wedding be an option for you? I think it would be a good compromise with your parents which is important if they're footing the bill. If you're paying, do what you want.

CubLub63 · 10-23-2009, 12:19 AM

Just thought I'd add that we didn't have our ceremony in a church. We had it at the same place as our reception.

_shortie_ · 10-23-2009, 12:20 AM

neither of us are very religous, I'm not sure about an outdoor wedding since we live in ND and are thinking of a september weddings.

Has anyone ever rented a banquet room in a hotel for a wedding?

Am · 10-23-2009, 12:21 AM

Originally Posted by _shortie_

neither of us are very religous, I'm not sure about an outdoor wedding since we live in ND and are thinking of a september weddings.

Has anyone ever rented a banquet room in a hotel for a wedding?

My best friend has hers in a place like that. She saved a lot of money because they already had tables, table cloths, rooms to get ready in and what not.

Kt-did · 10-23-2009, 11:00 PM

Neither of us is overly religious. I have my beliefs, he has his, and neither of us goes to church, so we opted for a wedding 'weekend retreat'. We rented some large cabins in the mountains during the summer (which is the 'off' season) and we are going to go with a non-denominational officiant. Neither of us wants a religious officiant despite both our families being VERY religious. It's OUR wedding, and no one elses life choices are going to drive OUR big day.

bb1982 · 10-24-2009, 08:13 AM

Neither one of us is religious, but our families are (mine Baptist, his Catholic) so there was no way we were going to worry about pleasing them, especially being so completely different in religious views.

So we compromised and hired a JOP to perform our ceremony, which we had in the same location as our recption. Which worked out great because we didn't have to find 2 places, guests didn't have to travel to 2 locations, and DH and I were able to have the quiet, simple, non-religious ceremony we wanted. Our ceremony was only 5 minutes long!

10-23-2009, 12:08 AM	#1 (permalink)
_shortie_ Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Me:Fargo My DB:Uganda Posts: 316 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 18% Longevity: 1%	How did you decide on a ceremony? My parents are very religous and want us to get married in a church, but my DB and I are tight on cash and don't really want a big wedding. He thinks a justice of the peace would be fine, but I can't decide if thats what I really want. How did you decide what to have? pro's cons?

10-23-2009, 12:11 AM	#2 (permalink)
katiedelta3 <3 Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Okinawa Posts: 5,155 Classifieds: (1) Activity: 93% Longevity: 17%	We knew we wanted a big wedding, it wasn't a decision. However, the ceremony isn't what is expensive about most big weddings. You can get married in a church, don't compromise what you want and settle, you'll regret it in the future. You can have a small church ceremony without a reception (just go out to eat with people after or something if you want to celebrate) or with a backyard cook out, something along those lines. __________________

10-23-2009, 12:14 AM	#4 (permalink)
sorraia I'm a duck! Quack, quack! Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Me: CA, Him: deployed Posts: 685 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 77% Longevity: 2%	We got married in our church for religious reasons. I forget exaclty how many people we had, but I think it was around 80. We tried to keep things small and simple, and pretty much succeeded. __________________

10-23-2009, 12:16 AM	#5 (permalink)
Am CarolinaHokie Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: VA/NC Posts: 12,796 Classifieds: (1) Activity: 94% Longevity: 28%	We both wanted a big wedding so that was easy. We're also both religious but wanted a beach wedding. We ultimately decided on a beach wedding with a preacher. I mean, how much closer to God can you be than outside in the open. Would a simple outdoor wedding be an option for you? I think it would be a good compromise with your parents which is important if they're footing the bill. If you're paying, do what you want. __________________

10-23-2009, 11:00 PM	#9 (permalink)
Kt-did I'm someone's baby Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: SoCal Posts: 2,820 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 19% Longevity: 34%	Neither of us is overly religious. I have my beliefs, he has his, and neither of us goes to church, so we opted for a wedding 'weekend retreat'. We rented some large cabins in the mountains during the summer (which is the 'off' season) and we are going to go with a non-denominational officiant. Neither of us wants a religious officiant despite both our families being VERY religious. It's OUR wedding, and no one elses life choices are going to drive OUR big day. __________________ ~Katie ~LIVE~LAUGH~LOVE~LEARN~ HE'S HOME!!! And he PROPOSED!

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10-23-2009, 12:14 AM	#3 (permalink)
CubLub63 Hurry up 2010! Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Me: Living in Texas. DH: Deployed. Posts: 7,353 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 89% Longevity: 40%	We decided to have a pastor from a non-denominational church do our ceremony. DH and I have our beliefs, but that's all they are. We're not very religious and our families are from different religions. It was the best for us because it was the most neutral. There were no cons to me. The pros were of course that it allowed us all to meet in the middle. Good luck!

10-23-2009, 12:19 AM	#6 (permalink)
CubLub63 Hurry up 2010! Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Me: Living in Texas. DH: Deployed. Posts: 7,353 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 89% Longevity: 40%	Just thought I'd add that we didn't have our ceremony in a church. We had it at the same place as our reception.

10-23-2009, 12:20 AM	#7 (permalink)
_shortie_ Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Me:Fargo My DB:Uganda Posts: 316 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 18% Longevity: 1%	neither of us are very religous, I'm not sure about an outdoor wedding since we live in ND and are thinking of a september weddings. Has anyone ever rented a banquet room in a hotel for a wedding?

10-24-2009, 08:13 AM	#10 (permalink)
bb1982 just call me Brando Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: soon to be Kbay, Hawaii!! Posts: 1,706 Classifieds: (0) Activity: 35% Longevity: 12%	Neither one of us is religious, but our families are (mine Baptist, his Catholic) so there was no way we were going to worry about pleasing them, especially being so completely different in religious views. So we compromised and hired a JOP to perform our ceremony, which we had in the same location as our recption. Which worked out great because we didn't have to find 2 places, guests didn't have to travel to 2 locations, and DH and I were able to have the quiet, simple, non-religious ceremony we wanted. Our ceremony was only 5 minutes long! __________________