Conceiving on R&R....

[Streif-wife]

My husband and I have been discussing the possiblity of trying to conceive on his 2 week leave. I am a little hesitant because our condo is too small to raise a child in but i dont think it would take much to find something we both like that is larger. He is trying to plan his leave 7months into his 13 months deployment so we would still have plently of time alone before the baby would come. I have been off birth control since he left and dont really feel like going back on due to personal reasons.


I guess im just wondering if anyone has any advice on this situation.!?!?

[Brittany Rashel]

well I wouldn't REALLY get your hopes up. It's pretty hard to conceive on the first cycle. Not to mention, there is no guarantee that you'll be ovulating at that time. Apparently DH and I are pretty fertile but it still took us 4 months to conceive DS. Just don't put all your eggs in one basket.

You sound like you are still kind of iffy on the subject so my advice is only TTC if you are 100% sure it is what you want. A baby changes everything and can potentially ruin a relationship if you aren't ready. Either way, good luck and I hope you get what you want.

[Streif-wife]

My debate is more on if i should go back on birth control ONLY for his leave, since i dont feel like using other orders of BS (condoms). I know the chances are low but i am more debating on how if it were to happen how he would be settling back into everything. He is all for trying and i just dont want him to be overwhemled when he gets home!

[Brittany Rashel]

well if you're not ready then I would go back on BC.

[Streif-wife]

Ya i guess this is something im going to have to dicuss with my husband more. I was just looking for someone that may have had experience with conveicing while on active duty and if it was a postive or negative thing for there marriage. This this is my husband first deployment I dont know how he will be when he gets back although we talk almost daily and and still as close as ever. I just dont know if people would recommend waiting inorder to spend more quality time together post deployment or just going ahead and giving it a shot. We really want to start a family soon but i dont want it to hurt our marriage in someway.!

[Brittany Rashel]

Well DH is active and it is hard. He's about to deploy in a few months actually. We're both having a hard time accepting that he'll be away for a whole year of Matt's life. I tell DH that it's okay and there will be plenty more years (no sense in making matters worse, kwim) but it still makes me sad. I wouldn't trade DS for the world but it is hard with his daddy being AD.

ETA but discuss it with your DH. None of us know what is right for the two of y'all. Y'all might be able to handle it too.

[JAYOSA]

Originally Posted by Streif-wife Ya i guess this is something im going to have to dicuss with my husband more. I was just looking for someone that may have had experience with conveicing while on active duty and if it was a postive or negative thing for there marriage. This this is my husband first deployment I dont know how he will be when he gets back although we talk almost daily and and still as close as ever. I just dont know if people would recommend waiting inorder to spend more quality time together post deployment or just going ahead and giving it a shot. We really want to start a family soon but i dont want it to hurt our marriage in someway.!

honestly you have to look at it as "if it happens, it happens." things happen for a reason. My husband is active duty and is deployed. Just found out he's been extended passed my due date. So not only am i going through this pregnancy alone, i can count the birth in as well. Although we are never 100% ready, you make sacrifices in your life to accomadate the baby. So if you truly want to try, try. There's no harm. Is there any reason for a baby to hurt your marriage?

[Ma*Becca]

I got pregnant with my last baby when my husband came home for 17 days out of a year lol I know a few others that have got pregnant on leave also. Making a marriage work is up the the couple, if you feel having a baby will be a negative impact on it I don't suggest you do it till you and him are ready physically and emotionally.

[pinknpretty4564]

DH and i are just going to let things happen. No more preventative measures and we are hoping that it happens on R&R. Its what he wants, its what i want, and we feel that its what is right for us right now. Him being Active Duty is hard, but its not impossible. Couples do it everyday. it will be so hard when he deploys and we have kids but it is something we have talked in incredible depth about- weighing all the pros and cons. it isnt a decision to make on a whim.

[Streif-wife]

Thanks for the advice ladies!!
I just have never been through a deployment and i guess since in new the army side of life i dont know how things work..