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Thread: I feel like im missing out ?& going crazy

  1. Old Newbie
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    #1

    I feel like im missing out ?& going crazy

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    So itís one of those nights that my thoughts are driving me insane and wonít let me sleep. Does anyone ever feel like theyíre missing out on so much of what goes on in their significant others life while they are away ? Am i crazy for feeling like we live 2 completely different lives just because Iíve never been through anything military people go through. How can i stop thinking like this ?
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    #2
    My DB says when he's deployed we do have separate lives - we're still a couple and a unit but until he's home we have different things we have to handle every day and we can't always make every decision together. I have to handle home stuff and he has to handle deployment stuff. When he can he fills me in on what he can, with his security clearance and what he does there's lots he can't tell me! There's going to be stuff at home that if he was here he'd know about but with everything going on there's no way he needs to stress about the little things. I don't think either of us are missing out (other than him on good food sometimes lol) but in the case of deployment separate isn't a bad thing! It's just something we deal with.
    I don't know if that helps you at all...
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    That does make a lot of sense when you put it into perspective like that! I definitely Need to get used to the idea of being so separated sometimes ! Thank you, that made me feel a little better about the situation (:
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    #4
    DH just recently left. He is at his first port call. While I will say technology has changed since his last deployment and I can text him a little more (our certain phone set up) but I still feel like I am missing things. But he is missing things here at home.

    Its ok to feel this way. But for you on your end you can't stop living. Go see friends, see family, go on trips.....

    While my husband is gone his mom and I are taking the kids to Disney world. This will be her first trip to Disney World. He is missing it. I feel bad but we can't stop living.
    Last edited by Margot31; 11-06-2017 at 07:07 AM.
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    #5
    Oh my gosh. Me and someone else were just talking about that in PM. It drives us nuts. We sometimes feel so left out of our SO's lives. Hers is off at training and mine is just stationed in another state, but it's frustrating. We both feel so guilty because of it and it's nothing that we can control.

    I feel like we live completely different lives. He works and games and goes to concerts and festivals. I pretty much stay home and study and wait for his calls. But there are a lot of things I do too that he misses out. Like picking pumpkins and baking Sometimes its a hit or miss. Just know you aren't alone and that you guys will be able to experience things together and make memories too.
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    #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Mellb12 View Post
    So it’s one of those nights that my thoughts are driving me insane and won’t let me sleep. Does anyone ever feel like they’re missing out on so much of what goes on in their significant others life while they are away ? Am i crazy for feeling like we live 2 completely different lives just because I’ve never been through anything military people go through. How can i stop thinking like this ?
    Same here. I don't mean it in a bad way, but when we talked I have no exciting news or events happening in MY life to share with him. And I don't want to just talk about work or say something just to say it I work and go home, pretty much just it. My break from being social is taking too long this time, I am not sure why. I'd listen what others advise, if you don't mind

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