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Thread: Marriage Finance Suggestions?

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    #1

    Marriage Finance Suggestions?

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    So I will be getting married soon and one question is how we will handle finances when we are married.

    My mom has said that a shared account can be tricky to handle if one person buys something large that the other one doesn't approve of and can lead to a lot of tension and arguments (that's what happened to her with my dad a lot).

    My Aunt and Uncle have always had separate accounts which has worked for them but then there's the question about which account to use for shared expenses like groceries, furniture and pet expenses.

    I'm considered having one shared account but we still have our own personal accounts for things that we personally want. The question is then deciding what parts of our paychecks go towards the shared vs. personal accounts.

    I've talked to DF about it but he is unsure about everything also. I just know that finances can become and issue in marriage and I would really like to start off with a strong system to stand by.

    Any suggestions or advise? Thanks!
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    I'm not married but I know that my cousin and his wife have a system where they each get a certain amount of "fun money" per month to spend on personal wants like a new (unnecessary) outfit or video games or going wine tasting, etc. and that's a pretty strict budget. I would think some other options would be that each person can spend up to a certain amount per month on personal wants without consulting the other or that each person can spend up to a certain amount on a single purchase without consulting the other.
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    As for how much to put in personal vs. shared accounts I would budget out all of your expenses for the month included necessary shared purchases for household items and some overflow for incidentals, then put a certain amount in savings (whatever you feel is reasonable) and divide the rest equally between personal accounts. In deciding how much you should consider your lifestyle. Does DF go out with the guys every Friday? Do you go shopping a lot? Pick a reasonable amount that you can stick to but know you may have to make some sacrifices.
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    We had a shared account for many years and I made sure the bills were paid, but it got bad. Money was being spent and account would go negative because we would both be spending at the same time. Communication is KEY with a shared account. Currently, SO and I have separate accounts, he pays the bills that are not the essentials ( essentials: car insurance, rent, water, internet, etc.) and I pay the essential bills. I think after talking to SO tho I am going to take over again. He is going to get his check, give me more than half to pay bills and leave him with an "allowance" to spend for the month, but we will keep separate accounts. SO is terrible with money so he suggested this, LOL.

    I know some people who each have their own account with their monthly allowance in it and then put the rest of the money in a shared account to pay bills from.
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    DH and I have both a joint account and separate accounts. Both of our paychecks go into the joint account, and we use that to pay our bills and date nights; anything for the house comes out of the joint. We also both get so much spending money a month and that gets transferred into the personal accounts. That's for stuff like pedicures, lunch with friends, car parts, basically anything unnecessary that we want.

    My suggestion is to be open about your financial goals and make a budget. You can try one way, see how it works for a few months and if that doesn't work, try another way. Communication is key about spending. DH and I have to discuss purchases over $150 that aren't groceries or household necessities (paper towels, TP, toothpaste, etc.)
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    #6
    If you do keep a shared account you might also make a rule that no one can make a purchase that would put the balance under a certain amount without consulting the other.
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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by EverlastingLove View Post
    DH and I have both a joint account and separate accounts. Both of our paychecks go into the joint account, and we use that to pay our bills and date nights; anything for the house comes out of the joint. We also both get so much spending money a month and that gets transferred into the personal accounts. That's for stuff like pedicures, lunch with friends, car parts, basically anything unnecessary that we want.

    My suggestion is to be open about your financial goals and make a budget. You can try one way, see how it works for a few months and if that doesn't work, try another way. Communication is key about spending. DH and I have to discuss purchases over $150 that aren't groceries or household necessities (paper towels, TP, toothpaste, etc.)
    I like this a lot.
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    #8
    We have a shared account, it is just easier for us.
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    #9
    DH and I share our accounts. I have an account for investing and he knows not to take money out of it. We talk over everything we buy and have to agree on any large purchases. I wrote a budget and at the end of every month we go over it and talk about anything we want to change or things we need to work on.
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    I've been a SAHM for our whole marriage (16 years) so what we have done is have the joint account which his pay goes into and we pay all bills from. And then he has a separate account for when he is gone on training or deployment. That way he can spend as he wishes (there is a set allotment for every 2 weeks) and it doesn't affect the joint account. I'm about to start working so we'll be keeping the joint account which our pays will go in and we'll pay our bills from. He'll keep getting his allotment but I'll get X amount of my pay for my IRA and personal checking. How much will depend on how much I make. We also have his IRA, a money market, a savings, savings for each child and his TSP.
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