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Thread: Gone a month and a half. Just starting to struggle.

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    Question Gone a month and a half. Just starting to struggle.

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    Hi, my DB has been gone for a little over a month and a half.. It was sad the first few days, but we established communication really quickly, and its been good since. The last week though, I have been getting emotional, and sad. I have started to feel really lonely and this is not the first deployment. I haven't felt this way before and its really bothering me. I have kept it together but today on Skype he asked me how I'm doing, and I just started crying. I try not to do that because I don't want him to feel bad or upset because we can't fix why I'm sad and lonely. Was wondering if anyone else ever starts to start off good and then goes down hill, and if so, what have you done about it? Thanks ladies.

    Lauren
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    The beginning of the deployment I was all like "OMG I CAN DO THIS! IT WILL GO BY QUICKLY". Then the reality set it, and I fell apart for a few days. It's normal. You don't have to feel bad keeping it from him, it's okay that he knows you're sad sometimes. You can't fix it but you can make the best out of it and use this time to maybe improve yourself, find some new hobbies, and don't focus on him being gone all the time. It will get better.
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    Hey Lauren, sorry to hear you're having a hard time. This is definitely the right place to be

    My DB has been gone for a few months now and there's definitely some times that are a bit harder than others. I've found that it's when I have downtime that it hits me the hardest. Keeping myself busy has been honestly the most helpful thing. It's normal to miss him and feel lonely, and it's okay to admit that. I'm the same way about not venting to DB about how I'm feeling, he can always tell when I'm having a rough time though. It might be helpful for you to write a letter about how you're feeling, even if you don't send it just getting the words out and working through it could be a stress reliever.

    Please don't hesitate to message me if you want to chat!
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    Liz has the right idea. My DB has been gone a little over 4 months. I don't like venting to . . . well . . . anyone, which is why I'm here, but especially not to him. He has enough on his plate but writing it down definitely helps. I'm not a cryer but during really tough times, I either go straight to the gym and refocus that energy or watch a tear-jerker and let the floodgates open. No matter how you choose to do it, you have to let it all out. Share with him, share with a close friend, or share with us! Isn't that what we're all here for?
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    Thanks Everyone. Its just so strange to me because this isn't the first deployment I've been through, but I'm handling it a lot differently than the last time. This week has just been a struggle. I stay busy with work M through F so that helps, but its more the night time, and weekends when I don't have as much going on, or I'm at our house and its so quiet. I know its going to get easier! I work in real estate, and the spring time is our busiest time, so I'm just looking forward to that fast paced work week to help speed it by. I feel a little bit better just sitting here talking about it. I'm having lunch with his mom on Thursday so maybe that'll help. Thanks everyone!!!!

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