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Thread: anyone kindly enough to share their experience?

  1. Old Newbie
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    #1

    anyone kindly enough to share their experience?

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    Good morning to all military spouses or significant others who read my post. I dont have any acquaintance with military community before so this is new to me. Here is my story: I met this guy online, Turn out he is a US Navy sailor, stationed overseas. we talk through phone, email, and video call using skype. I know his rank, where he lives and he seems genuine. We like each other, and thinking about possibility of us being together. i dont want to rush anything, since we still getting to know each other and i think its a huge commitment when we decided to be together. Im not a US citizen and i have a good career of my own.He has demanding job, i cant count how many times he got call from work when we talk and has to go immediately, just like that. (He works at naval hospital) Its annoying at the first time but now i tried to understand him. We also talk about marriage and meeting his family in states. Since he cant get leave easily, i decided to visit him at his stationed country, so we can spend time together. Im wondering if there is anyone who kind enough to share their experience being US navy wife or girlfriend? especially with medical corps? Is there any article or material i can read? I really want to know what im getting into before i make any big decision. Hope to hear back from you soon.. any advice will be appreciated.. have a great day..

    C
  2. Ummmmm...........
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    Take it SLOW! That is my biggest suggestion. You didn't really give a time frame in your post, so I'm not exactly sure how long you have been together, but taking it slow is my biggest suggestion. Be prepared for anything, is another suggestion I have. Be prepared that if you meet him, he is not who he says he is. I'm not suggesting he is anything other than what we he says he is but time and time again people get scammed. Personally, I would not even discuss marriage until I meet his family and or have absolutely no doubt in my body and mind that he is 100% genuine. Send no money to him. Nothing. No "I want to go home but I don't have the money." Do not give him a dime. Do not share financial information (bank accounts, ect.),either.

    If you meet him make sure someone or multiple people know where you are. Let them know what time you will be meeting them and if they don't hear from you by a certain time that something went wrong or isn't right.

    Be safe, protect yourself.

    Welcome to MSOS. There are tons of wonderful people here.
    Last edited by Abbynormal; 12-16-2013 at 04:33 AM.
  3. Old Newbie
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    #3
    Hi Abby, thanks for your advice. Yes, safety is my biggest concern as well. So far, i havent found any suspicious thing about him.. We've been talking to each other for few weeks. Still new, im aware of that, thats the reason why i dont want to rush into anything. I have plan to visit Japan for holiday and since he also stationed there, i didnt see any harm to visit him for few days.. just want to know if he is real. Im curious tho, he told me he get leave for a month and will go back to states to visit his family. is it possible for someone who works in military to take such long leave? he never ask me to send anything to him, just advice me to come before or after those dates if i want to visit him. thanks for reading my post
  4. Ummmmm...........
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    #4
    Quote Originally Posted by littleebee17 View Post
    Hi Abby, thanks for your advice. Yes, safety is my biggest concern as well. So far, i havent found any suspicious thing about him.. We've been talking to each other for few weeks. Still new, im aware of that, thats the reason why i dont want to rush into anything. I have plan to visit Japan for holiday and since he also stationed there, i didnt see any harm to visit him for few days.. just want to know if he is real. Im curious tho, he told me he get leave for a month and will go back to states to visit his family. is it possible for someone who works in military to take such long leave? he never ask me to send anything to him, just advice me to come before or after those dates if i want to visit him. thanks for reading my post

    Yes, it is possible for him to take that much time off. It's not something I would call common, but I suppose for someone stationed outside of the US, I would say taking a month of leave is well within the realm of possibility.
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    Yes, a month of leave is possible, and it is probably more common for those overseas. They try to give longer periods of leave since they know that airfare is expensive.

    Does he live on base?

    If you do go visit him, it would quickly be clear if he's in the military. If he can get you on base himself, then that's pretty much proof. Technically, he could be a base civilian employee, but if he signs you on base, you can feel fairly secure that he is legit.
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
  6. Old Newbie
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    Hello villanelle, thanks for your reply. He told me he applied for the leave months before. He has been stationed in okinawa for 2 years now and still have few months left before he has to return to States and get his new order. He live off base, but i have seen him in uniform, and he has ID tag. We do have plan to go to church for sunday mass on base i just hope everything go smoothly when i see him..
  7. aka Milfon2Wheelz
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    #7
    Hi and welcome. Where are you from?
  8. Old Newbie
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    #8
    Hi there, thanks for your kindness.. i come from the land down under aka Australia, but currently working overseas.. what about you?
  9. Senior Member
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    #9
    Hi! I met my DB online too. I would say that the biggest thing is making sure that you are comfortable with whatever he is asking. I know I myself wouldn't want to stay with him when I visited him and had never truly met him. That’s something I would be uncomfortable with. Just listen to your instinct as to what you feel in your gut is right and enjoy the experience.

    As for dating someone in the military, it’s a unique experience. There is so much to learn and so much that I don’t understand. It can get a little frustrating when he speaks in all acronyms and I don't understand a single one, but it comes with its fair share of benefits, and for him, I will learn anything that he wants to share with me. If you have any questions or need someone to talk to, my PM box is open
  10. Just your everyday, laidback Aussie Girl
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    #10
    I met my hubby online 11 yrs ago, he was in England and I was home in Australia. We talked on phone, skype, email, etc and met in person a little over a year later. It was almost 18 mths later before we saw each other again (by then he had PCS'd to Okinawa, Japan) and then another 6 mths before he visited again and we got engaged. We got married in Japan a month later and then 6mths after that I officially moved to Okinawa after we had a ceremony with family. I didn't meet his family till the week of the wedding ceremony. So basically the first 3 yrs of our relationship was long distance and we spent a total of a month together before we got married. We have been married 8yrs this coming March and have 4 kids together (I was preggo with my oldest when we met).

    All I have to sa is take it VERY slow. If he is really the one he will wait.

    PM me if you have any questions


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