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Thread: Money issues

  1. Fresh Newbie
    AshleyS's Avatar
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    #1

    Money issues

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    My husband and I have been married for about 3 months now and we are both fairly young. My husband is terrible with money and I've tried talking to him about everything but nothing seems to get through to him. Does anyone have any advice on what I could do to get through to him or how to handle this situation?
  2. Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?
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    #2
    Sometimes it's more effective to have a neutral third party do an unbiased assessment and offer advice. It might help to make an appointment with a financial advisor. Depending on what resources you have available to you (military, your financial institution, church, etc.) it could even be free.

    Did you guys discuss your plans and goals for finances before you got married?
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    #3
    write down everything that comes in and everything that goes out.

    show him on paper what is going on.

    then discuss ways to change the spending and savings habits.
    maybe think about an allowance, It sounds silly, but it is a way to watch what your spending.

    also set spending limits- When DH was junior enlisted and we were newly married we agreed that we would not spend more than 100 dollars without the others knowledge.

    It worked out really well and made it so we had to talk about money all the time.

    but most importantly be respectful and work together to find a balance in your own marriage.
  4. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    #4
    Quote Originally Posted by Tojai View Post
    Sometimes it's more effective to have a neutral third party do an unbiased assessment and offer advice. It might help to make an appointment with a financial advisor. Depending on what resources you have available to you (military, your financial institution, church, etc.) it could even be free.

    Did you guys discuss your plans and goals for finances before you got married?
    All of this.

    Financial management can be a huge area for disagreement in a marriage, so it's something to take very seriously. I would suggest making an appointment with an advisor who will look at ALL of your finances with you both. That way you can work towards a goal together. I'm sure there are areas where you can both improve, and IMO that's the best way to handle it. Instead of telling him he needs to fix his spending, explain that you BOTH need to work on financial management to reach x, y, z goals.
  5. Senior Member
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    #5
    What was your plan for money before you got married. What part of that isn't working for you?

    Are you doing combined or separate (or somewhere in the middle)?

    Would he agree to having a monthly allotment of spending money, handed to him in cash, with absolutely no other spending other than very, very set categories (groceries and gas, maybe)? You could each agree to that, as well as to limits for other categories (like groceries, eat out together, etc.).

    With someone who is "bad with money" (which really just means he doesn't care enough to make it important), it often helps to have extremely rigid requirements, but only if he agrees to them willingly.
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
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    #6
    I know there are financial advising services on base. Maybe the two of you could go together? Oftentimes advice from a neutral third party is better heard.
  7. Account Closed
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    #7
    As a volunteer from the NMCRS we always recommend even for members to come in even just to do a review budget. They sit down with you and do a budget that can be printed out and sent to your email and sit down and really show you things.

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