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Thread: Alimony question

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    #1

    Alimony question

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    I just had a question for anyone who has been or is getting divorced. Obvs I plan to ask my attorney for sure, but I was wanting some input from you fabulous ladies and gents before asking him.

    Ex DH will be paying back my student loans for me ($25k). I did not ask him to do this, he offered. I think he feels guilty about leaving me.

    Anywho, do I have the right to ask for alimony in addition? I would only ask for it to be paid for three years, since that's how long we were married, and that's how long I was unable to seek gainful employment as I followed him all over the country. If I get remarried within three years, the alimony would end then. What would be a reasonable amount to ask for per month, if it's ok to request it?

    My parents think I should go for it, as reimbursement for the three years I had trouble finding work. I'm hesitant because I feel he is already doing so in a way by repaying my student loans, which are not a small sum. Thoughts?
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    #2
    Never hurts to ask him for it, but I wouldn't ask him directly, I would just ask your lawyer to include it.
    Just expect to not get it. Alimony isn't easy to get. But, never hurts to ask.

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    #3
    Never been married, or divorced, but I doubt you'd get alimony in addition to him paying off your student loans. Unless the monthly payments on those are pretty minimal.
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    #4
    Hmm.. I suppose it can't hurt to ask? I walked away with $25K in student loans when my ex and I divorced, but he also walked away with debt (like my car payment.. we paid his car off, so mine was the only vehicle with a loan on it). BUT we had been married 7 years and I didn't get any spousal maintenance (what they call "alimony" in WA I guess)... despite having been a stay at home mom for the last 5 years of our marriage (basically as soon as we had kids). I DID get child support, of course. We didn't use lawyers, but I was basically told that my chances of getting anything, since we were married less than 10 years, were slim to none... but every state is different. I don't think it can hurt to ask, but I'd also be worried that he would say, "Fine, I'm not paying your student loans, then." If alimony over 3 years would equal more than $25K, that'd be good.. but if you aren't going to be awarded alimony (I'd ask your lawyer to advise you on the likelihood of it being awarded) and he gets pissed off that you ask and no longer wants to pay your $25K in student loans, then that would suck.
    Beth, Mama to Emmalee (12), Evan (9), and Ella (4 on May 7) (I really REALLY need to update my picture!)
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    #5
    Not sure how accurate this is and if you're filing in TX (just going off your location by your name), but according to this, it doesn't look likely that you'd be awarded alimony (in TX) if you've been married less than 10 years: New Alimony Laws in Texas, Spousal Maintenance Changes
    Beth, Mama to Emmalee (12), Evan (9), and Ella (4 on May 7) (I really REALLY need to update my picture!)
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    #6
    Keep in mind, the support office cannot 'collect' alimony. So, if he gets awarded that he has to pay alimony there is no way to get it from him if he chooses not to pay it. Unlike Child Support, where you can get his wages garnished, you can't garnish wages for alimony/spousal support. Of course, clear that with your lawyer in case your state is different.

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    #7
    Personally if I were divorcing and he took that much of MY debt, there's no way I'd ask for alimony. Then again, I didn't ask for child support when I divorced my ex either. I told him to set up college funds for the kids and put the money in there instead. I didn't need his money and didn't want it.





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    #8
    Thank you for all your input. Honestly, I feel rotten for even asking/ thinking about it, given he doesn't have to pay off my student loans. My parents, however, are up my ass about asking for it. I may just tell them I'm not entitled to it without bothering to ask my lawyer.
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    #9
    I wouldn't lie, and I would at least ask your lawyer.
    He will tell you what the law is and if your entitled to it.

    DH had to pay alimony for 8 months until the divorce was final- 800 a month.
    I received Alimony from both exes- the first one for 3 years at 500 a month + child support, the second for 1 yr of 1,000 a month ( no CS)
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    #10
    The thing is that it doesn't matter if the law says you are entitled to it. You aren't entitled to 25k in student loan repayment. The law is essentially just a minimum. If the parties agree to more, that's fine.

    That said, personally, I wouldn't ask, given that he's paying the student loan, or I would ask for a minimal amount for maybe 6 months, to give myself time to get up and running again, and nothing more than that.
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
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