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Thread: Boyfriend talking to parents before proposing

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    #1

    Boyfriend talking to parents before proposing

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    Hey so my SO wants to talk to my parents before we get married to see what they say about it. How did your SO go about doing it and if your parents didn't agree did with the marriage did you still go through with getting married?
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    #2
    DH didn't ask mine.
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    #3
    DH didn't ask my parents. I feel that's really old school & no need for it but to each their own.

    Honestly, IMO, whether a parent agrees with a marriage or not means nothing. It is YOUR life & YOUR decision. While having their blessing is great & all, it is not needed unless you would ultimately base your relationship around their opinion.

    "Thank you so much. No matter what, nothing is possible without you behind the scenes bustin heads and takin names. Thank you again. Everything you have done for me means a lot and nothing has gone unnoticed. I love you so much and thank you for saying 'I do.'"
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    #4
    DH didn't talk to them about it. I was 23 at the time, DH 27 - mature enough to make our own decision about it. Also, I'm not big on the 'permission to marry' thing since I'm not close to my father. My folks were happy for me, just concerned about me moving across the country to Alaska!
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    #5
    DH talked to my mom and step-dad before we got married (we were never engaged), and my step-dad basically told him that once we were married, there was no divorcing me and if he ever breaks my heart, they won't ever find DH's body.

    ETA: it wasn't a "can I marry her" convo, as we already had our license. It was just a "before you marry my daughter, this is what you need to know" kind of thing.
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    #6
    My DF talked to my dad before he proposed. We'd been dating nearly 3 years so my parents knew him fairly well. He told my dad he'd like to take my hand in marriage and asked if he'd like to see the ring. My dad was shocked but really happy. So basically he wasnt really asking permission, but rather his blessing Even if your parents don't approve, it's YOUR decision and if you know he's the one for you then you have to let yourself be happy I bet they'd come around eventually.
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    #7
    My husband called my grandma when we were on vacation to let her know he intended to ask me there. He didn't ask for permission, it was a heads up I guess and my whole family (cause she told everyone immediately) really liked that he did that. I couldn't care less lol.

    Oh, and she tried to talk him out of it. She said "are you sure? She's really mean." and now every time he feels I have an attitude he says he should've listened to grandma.
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    #8
    DH and I went out for dinner with my parents. My father went out to smoke and DH went to the bathroom. I found out later he actually went outside to ask for my hand in marriage
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    #9
    DF "went home to visit his parents" but he was actually going to visit my parents and tell them his intentions. I was completely oblivious. He wanted to show them the ring too but it was held up in a blizzard somewhere.

    Anyway, it was more of a respectful 'I want you guys to be the first to know' sort of thing than a 'Can we?' sort of thing. My parents knew DF very well by then and if they had some sort of problem with him it would have already come up.

    TBH I don't think I could marry someone that my parents completely hate. I know it's my life and my decision but they are my parents and I love and respect them. They're reasonable people.
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    #10
    DH did not ask my parents. I feel that is a personal choice, but my parents do not make decisions for me, so there was no need to ask for their blessing.



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