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Thread: in a nutshell

  1. Fresh Newbie
    ArmyGfMichi422's Avatar
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    in a nutshell

    I'm recently engaged and i have to say that my soldier and i rushed into thigs , but i know we both want to be closer to eachother and comitted to eachother. when my soldier and i first met i lied to him about my age. i told him i was a year older than i really was. i mt him at 17 and i am 18 now. i told him the day of our birthday my real age. except he was drunk and he doesnt remember it. we are four years apart and there is nothing wrong with that. I want to tell him again just to make sure he got it the first time. because when we get married i dont want it to be a big thing.

    ( i know i shouldnt have lied, but i was stupid and i owned up and told him) ( just dont think he remembers)

    (please dont judge)

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    Umm... IMHO, not trying to be mean, you started your relationship off with a lie. Now you're debating whether you should start your marriage (that you obviously don't think you're ready for if you say ya'll moved too fast) based off that same lie.

    My insight? You shouldn't be getting married yet if you can't even be honest to your DF.
  3. Senior Member
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    ugh ya tell him again, that should be a no brainer

    No one is guaranteed happiness. You can pursue it, but if you happen to find success along the way on that road to happiness, Conservatives believe you should not be demonized or penalized for it.
    Glenn Beck
  4. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    I'm not sure that I followed the post correctly. But if it's the same way jamie14 interpreted it, I have to agree with her.
  5. Certified G
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    Yeah, I think I'm a little confused as well.

    From what I gather, I agree with jaimie14 also. If you're not mature enough to tell him the truth to begin with, you're not mature enough to be getting married. Even more so when you admit to having rushed into it. Sounds like a bad thing from the very beginning.

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    you are engaged and there is a possibility he doesn't even know your real age? thats kinda crappy

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    Quote Originally Posted by amandabcdefg View Post
    you are engaged and there is a possibility he doesn't even know your real age? thats kinda crappy
    i agree! and if your feeling rushed then be honest with him and slow it down. if your not ready then your not ready. imagine if you got married and he told you later he was older than he had originally told you. wouldnt feel so good?
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    Reagan's Avatar
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    Well better tell him now than him finding out when you go in to get your marriage license. I guarantee it won't go over very well then.

    Is this even a real question? That should be a no brainer. You marry someone he deserves to know your real age. I'd be butt hurt to be honest if my DF all of a sudden told me he lied about his age after I agreed to marry him!
  9. Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?
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    I agree, tell him again and apologize for your dishonesty. There's only so much you can do, how he handles you lying will be up to him and the ball will be in his court.

    This might also be a good time to tell him that you rushed into things ... that you wanted to feel close and committed but you rushed it. Getting married is about a lot more than just feeling close and feeling like you are committed, it's a legal contract at the very least. When he's sober and you guys have time for a serious talk, get all the cards out on the table. Good luck.
  10. Senior Member
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    I don't think you're mature enough to be getting married. You should tell him the truth, the whole truth that you think you rushed things and wait a few years to get married.
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