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Thread: Advice

  1. Old Newbie
    Roby's Avatar
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    #1

    Advice

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    My husband and I have been toegther almost four years and married for a year and a half of it. We finally are in our first deployment together and i know i am loosing my mind lol. The first few weeks were a breeze but then something happened i was sharing little trip I had taken with the childtren and he though i was trying to rub it in his face. My daughter and i were in a car accident and thats when emotionally I changed from being ok to needing him. I was careful about what i sent in emails but i guess kind of needy. Then here recently i had sent an email and it got taken the wrong way and he stopped talking to me, i apologised after rereading the email and told him it was not meant to sound so badly. I was worried sick about him for days then i see that he makes a post on facebook. I eventually tell him that i was not mad but upset that he was actually avoiding me. He is still not talking to me and my world is just turned upside down and not sure what to do here. We have four more months in this deployment and if he cant or is unwilling to talk to me i am not sure what to say or do. I just need some advice i don't want to push him but really do not want to be crying my eyes out either. Previous to this our relation ship was strong we rarely ever fought talked everything out and had a great understanding of each other.
  2. Semper Fi kinda Life <3
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    #2
    My husband and I have not been through a deployment together yet. But, I did go through a deployment with my ex and even though he had been overseas a couple times prior; he still completely shut down when it came to the deployment. He became very distant. Even before he left he would make comments about deploying that would catch me off guard. When I asked him about it he apologized and explained that shutting down was how he dealt with deploying.

    It's very possible that your husband is just extremely stressed and/or unhappy because he's deployed and unfortunately he's taking out those feelings on you. You definitely dont want to push because it will just make it worse. Just make sure he knows where you are coming from and that you understand his side of things too. He'll come around.
  3. S&M
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    I am sorry to hear about the accident. I would just give him time. I notice with my husband that when its something really upsetting he stops talking. I dont know if its because the way the military has trained them now but I would just email him explaining and leave the "ball in his court". And just reassure him that you love him and that you are still supporting him.
  4. Senior Member
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    #4
    I am sorry. I have no advise but I can still give ya hugs!
    proudarmygrlfrnd and PinkyLee are my WIFEYS!
  5. Old Newbie
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    Thanks I am actually glad I found an active forum for support. We just moved to our new home and friends are just not in the picture lol. I emailed him apologized if I was short, usually we are so great about communication. I assumed we would be ok and we're till recently. It is up to him but I fear this ignoring each other will do more damage in the long run. Not speaking to someone for that long and trying to regain some sort of relationship could fail horribly.

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