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Thread: I need some advice

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    Haleyscomet's Avatar
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    #1

    Help I need some advice

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    So MF is trying to figure out if he wants to re-enlist or not. He keeps looking to me for help and I've tried to help him weigh the pros and cons but it didn't really get us anywhere. He's totally stuck. I know many of you have had to deal with this situation with your own SO's and I am just wondering if you have any advice? What did you do to help? Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

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    #2
    Dh changes his damn mind everyday Finally I said I was putting in his school applications for UT and he said okay. I kind of made the decision for him because I was SO tired of him going back and forth.


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    If he did not re-enlist, what would he do? Is his goal realistic, or is it 'become country singing superstar'? Does he have a set plan in place should he decide not to re-enlist? And on the flip side- why does he want to re-enlist? Does he see the military as something he would like to do career?
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    #4
    we always discuss everything-
    when talking about reenlisting- many moons ago ( once he reached 10 years there was no more duscussion he was in for 20)
    we did pros and cons:
    about the military
    and pros and cons about being civilian.

    the military won out every time.

    DH went indefinite 6 years ago and has not had to "reenlist" he is just in
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    I told my db that reinlisting would be the best thing right now because with the economy the way it is, find a job will be difficult. And military is more of a safe job for the most part.

    He listened but then again I told him he wouldn't be able to afford his car if he got out


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    #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Dr.VinoVet View Post
    If he did not re-enlist, what would he do? Is his goal realistic, or is it 'become country singing superstar'? Does he have a set plan in place should he decide not to re-enlist? And on the flip side- why does he want to re-enlist? Does he see the military as something he would like to do career?
    He would go to college and join the national guard + get a job. He applied to a university and got in so he knows he could go but it's just a matter of whether he does it or not. He wants to re-enlist because of the pay, the benefits, because he has fun 50% of the time, and because he feels like if he gets out that it will be like he has unfinished business. Like he's not quite done with the military.

    It's just become so hard because when we wrote out all the pros and cons, there's the same amount of pros and cons.

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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Haleyscomet View Post
    He would go to college and join the national guard + get a job. He applied to a university and got in so he knows he could go but it's just a matter of whether he does it or not. He wants to re-enlist because of the pay, the benefits, because he has fun 50% of the time, and because he feels like if he gets out that it will be like he has unfinished business. Like he's not quite done with the military.

    It's just become so hard because when we wrote out all the pros and cons, there's the same amount of pros and cons.
    then he should stay in until he feels his unfinished business is finished. But it goes back to how he feels.


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    #8
    If you can handle either outcome, and he feels like he is being pulled towards the military (judging by the unfinished business deal), then I would say that might be a good option for him.

    Just tell him that you will support him no matter his decision. Good luck!
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    #9
    When I first met my husband he had one year left in the military and said he was ready to get out... four years later and he's still in lol.

    We're currently having the same issue of trying to decide whether he should stay in or not. I don't think my husband is ever going to feel "ready" to get out of the military, its all he's known for a long time. At the same time though, I think he wants to see what else is out there and explore life's possibilities.
    It's a tough one....
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by Dr.VinoVet View Post
    If you can handle either outcome, and he feels like he is being pulled towards the military (judging by the unfinished business deal), then I would say that might be a good option for him.

    Just tell him that you will support him no matter his decision. Good luck!


    Put on your big girl panties and deal with it like a boss.

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