He's in a good mood!

[Britt]

.

I found a beautiful quote by Shakespeare, and I think it's fitting for PTSD survivors.

Presume not that I am the thing I was.

-Shakespeare

[Shannon Marie]

Originally Posted by Britt And these days, that's call for celebration! He was moved at work, to a corner with a window, by himself. He found out who was making waves for him at work; this woman is still complaining about him, even though he's half a room away, with no one surrounding him. He told his supervisor that he was trying to be upfront with people by explaining his condition, and instead he's been ridiculed, watched, and tattled on since he came back from his hospital stay in March. He said if he had known that was the reaction he would've gotten, he wouldn't have told anyone and would have preferred to be looked at as an ass, not someone who's "unstable" and "intimidating." Anyhow, he sounded really happy on the phone, which is a rarity. He also apologized because he's "difficult." Actually his words are always the same, "I'm sorry it's not easy living with me. I do love you, and hope you're still happy with me."Him saying that gives my heart wings, and crushes it into a million pieces. I don't want it to be difficult. I just want to be happy, with my husband. I found a beautiful quote by Shakespeare, and I think it's fitting for PTSD survivors. Presume not that I am the thing I was. -Shakespeare

That is so sweet. Wow. I'm so glad things are looking up.

[Britt]

I know.

I does break my heart that he thinks that way. Like it's a chore living with him, and I could possibly one day leave.

I know there are days that is a chore - but I refuse to give up on him. I know he wouldn't give up on me.

[Germanchick]

Originally Posted by Britt I know. I does break my heart that he thinks that way. Like it's a chore living with him, and I could possibly one day leave. I know there are days that is a chore - but I refuse to give up on him. I know he wouldn't give up on me.

That is dh biggest fear. In his words "one day you'll wake up and realize that you want to leave me" it is heartbreaking to hear it every single time. But like you I refuse to give up. For us the better days outnumber the bad days right now. It will get better. It's just a long and difficult road to get to that point

[louisa85]

[Jenna]

awww I'm so happy for you! for good days!

[TallBlondie82]

Britt, Im so happy for you

You guys have been on my mind lately, I've been wondering if you were alright!!

[Britt]

We're doing alright - aside from the panic attack he had on Sunday.

Thanks for thinking about me!

[Patience]

I love to connect with women who are in it for the long haul. When Bob would ask me why I stayed with him, I always said, "You are worth the pain."
I used to think he had problems because I was a bad wife, because no one knew about PTSD in 1966, and he agreed! What did we know back then? I was a relief for both of us when we found out what it was and that other people went through it too, and there was help. That was 1980.
I wrote the book I wished I'd had when he got back, later (Recovering From The War). It is still in print and you can google it. The examples are all from Vietnam, but the questions and the sections on PTSD and family recovery still apply, and I have had active duty personnel tell me it really helped them or saved their marriage, etc. which of course makes me soooo happy, because that was my intention.
One thing I want to suggest: If he's having a good day and you are too, that's great, but it is also important to learn to have good days when he is having bad ones. It takes a tremendous burden off him. I learned to have good days when Bob was having bad ones at Alanon, by practicing loving detachment and learning not to personalize things. I simply say PTSD to myself when they say alcoholism in the meetings.
They can't avoid all bad days and feelings or they will stay stuck. Healing is going through those feelings, and we need to have people, like this group, who can support us when we want to cheer them up or take away the guilt of surviving. (Yes, they are not guilty for surviving, but it is their feeling and they have to feel it and find that out for themselves, usually through therapy.
Glad you had a good day. I know that joy!

[Traci08]

Patience, I love to see that too. I too, thought it was because I was a bad wife and mother. I wrote my husband a letter stating that if he wasn't worth all of this, it would've been over long ago. I still have my days where I feel like giving up, but gosh I am more stubborn about this than I thought I was. I find that when I've lost my strength coming here and talking to all of you helps me regain that strength and it makes me more determined than ever to fight!

Britt: Don't you just love days like this! Even if it doesn't last but a few hours, it is the biggest natural high. I love it when my husband is in a great mood! He actually talks to me. He actually talks to our son. Its the most wonderful feeling in the whole world! I love that quote and it is very fitting for PTSD survivors. Its also very useful for their carers, especially when we lose sight.