Update Us.

[Britt]

How are you doing?

How is your spouse/significant other doing? Is he active duty, or a veteran?

How are your children doing?

Any new developments?


** I just thought it would be nice to do a status check. **

[Britt]

How are you doing? I'm pretty good, actually. I'm feeling hopeful.

How is your spouse/significant other doing? Is he active duty, or a veteran? DJ is day-to-day. Yesterday he had a bad day at work, but received good news from the VA when he got home. His communication is getting stronger; it's something we're both working very hard on.

DJ's been out of the Navy for 16 months now. It's still an adjustment.

How are your children doing? We don't have children, yet. I asked this question because I would like some insight on how your children react/deal with your husband and his PTSD.

Any new developments? DJ's PTSD rating was increased from 30% to 70%; that increased his overall rating from from 50% to 80%. He's has mixed feelings about this. It validates and proves that he has problems, but he struggles with the fact that the problems are now acknowledged. His words to me last night were, "I've been trying to get someone to understand I have problems for the last four years. Now that someone did, I don't know what to do."

We've quit our one counseling group because the format was not conducive to my husband. We continue to go to Tuesday night group with the Vietnam Vets. They've really welcomed me and my husband in, and it's great that DJ is forming a connection with them.

[leanne]

How are you doing? I am doing ok. I have a cold and other things are frustrating me but since i am not yet pulling our my hair or screaming like a maniac i am ok. i hope that makes sense to others.

How is your spouse/significant other doing? Is he active duty, or a veteran? he is a veteran. and we had a slight set back yesterday, he got angry over me having an argument with my mother. an argument that he wanted me to end by hanging up on her and when i did not get left for about an hour. at least he left to cool down instead of his normal reaction of snatching the phone and screaming at me. that is a step in the right direction.

How are your children doing? they are taking all this the best way they can. we have a little rebellion going on and some issues with them that we are working on.

Any new developments? we have stopped him from taking the topimirate. we did it without doctor consent. he is on another kind of seizure medicine that seems to be working . the topimirate has the side of affect of weight loss and appetite supressor. he had lost nearly 50 pounds and was anorexic looking and it was not getting better se we decided that it was better to stop him from taking it. he has gained 5 pounds back because of that decision and seems to have more zest for life.

so it is a plus for us although i am sure his doctors are not going to agree.

[jessi01]

How are you doing?
Not so good, my anniversary is today and we are finalizing our divorce this week as well.

How is your spouse/significant other doing? Is he active duty, or a veteran?
He's active duty, not doing so great either. He was diagnosed a few months ago, finally admits it, blames all of the horrible things he's done on PTSD . . says he cannot feel any emotions other than anger . . that the feelings he had when we got married and during our good times are dead . . and that he believes he was only put on this earth to be a soldier . . he can't sleep because of the memories he has when he tries to go to bed . . and he wants our marriage to be over as quickly as possible. He leaves for Afghanistan any day now.

How are your children doing?
My son is doing better, but hates his stepdad and is very angry. He is 16 and says that he will never trust people again. He has not spoken to his stepfather since the day he snapped and walked out.

Any new developments?
Just what I listed above. The war, this PTSD, has destroyed my husband, my family and my future as I knew it.

[hisgirl7477]

How are you doing?
I'm great. I'm healng. I have bad days of course, but more good than bad these days.

How is your spouse/significant other doing?
Who knows. Nah, I do know. He's alive and healthy. Still deployed. Ridiculous considering he's ranked 60%. Whatever. I give up fighting the military about that one for now. Someday, once I've healed, I"ll find my voice regardig their sending these guys back over and over even though they're RANKED disabled with ptsd.

How are your children doing?
We didn't have any. But he was very close with my baby brother. Brother was hurt and angry for so very long. Finally this weekend he told me he just misses my ex and hopes hes ok and still has dreams about him sometimes and hopes he knows that he still loves him, even after al he's done to me. Its hard on kids. I don't know how you moms handle it.

Any new developments?
I'm finally healing. I miss him dearly, but I'm starting to make peace with it. I can blame him and not feel guilty. I can blame the military and not feel anger. I'm still working on the utter disappointment and disallusionment I have with my country now. I love my country - equal with God and my family. And my country took part of my family away from me forever, I'm having a hard time forgiving and accepting that. War sucks.

I have moved on. Have started seeing a new man who is not currently in the military, he's been out for over 15 years. So far so good. Going very very slowly. He knows the whooooole sorted story and is supportive as hell, tender, funny, loving and strong. We shall see... its in the early stages... but its a good sign for my healing I think.

[starlisa]

How are you doing? Better... Just got a job in retail until I can find something better. Money is extremely tight since ex took much of it. Lately, I've been annoyed at myself... my degree means nothing around here and I'm starting to regret going to college.

How is your spouse/significant other doing? Is he active duty, or a veteran? Veteran. He's working but is refusing to pay the child support since I "took all his money anyway". He's gotten himself settled in though, which is good.

How are your children doing? DD is fine. She barely knew him, so when he comes over (which is only once every two or three weeks for an hour), she is still very unsure about him. DD is really happy though... I'm happy to spend time with her and she's growing so fast lol

Any new developments? exDH has stopped going to his VA appointments for his PTSD/Clinical depression. I have thought about him, missing the time before his deployment, but remembering that I need to move forward and continue on.

I was dating a little, nothing serious. Lately I've taken a break from it and just tried to concentrate on making friends. Whenever that awesome job comes around, I want to buy a house, and I'm really looking forward to that =]