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Thread: Another hot car death

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    #21
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    I went to the vet today. Got in my car, got out, went to get the post it with the notes on it, back to the car, phone rang. Started to drive down the street. Saw the note with the pets name.
    I had forgotten I was going to the vet, and I forgot the animals.
    Nanny Kelley was waiting outside with them when I turned around. Laughing at me.


    False memories are created all the time. People are concentrating on driving. They may forget they they have a baby asleep in the back seat.
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    #22
    I used to think that there was no way someone could leave a baby in a car and forget. What kind of horrible person would do that?! Then a thread on here got me to thinking so I did a little research and found an article like rocketliz posted (it may have been the same one). After reading the article, it makes a lot of sense how something like that could happen by accident. Now all I feel is bad for the family. The guilt that parent must feel is tremendous. It's just an awful situation.




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    #23
    Quote Originally Posted by HisJuliet View Post
    ...

    Do you really think the people are "uneducated" when this happens? It happens more than you think. Not always resulting in death, but there are several instances of people realizing kids are in the car when they get to work, gym etc and they forgot. People do forget.

    Every situation of these I hear about is different, but my knee jerk reaction is to feel awful for the parents.
    In most of the cases I have heard about the child was left on purpose so the parent could run and do something and they just didn't realize how hot the car gets during that time or didnt think they would be gone that long. It happened exactly that way in my hometown. The mom left her daughter in the van while she went into the grocery store and she didn't think it was hot enough out for anything bad to happen to her child. People don't realize that it can feel mild outside and still be baking inside a vehicle. So yes. Often times uneducated
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    #24
    When my youngest was 3 weeks old, I was sleep deprived and had a deployed husband. Did my morning routine, put the baby in the car seat, loads up big kids and got in the car, completely leaving the baby in the foyer.

    Thankfully, I remembered, but it can definitely happen and it breaks my heart to think how devestated got must be.
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    #25
    Quote Originally Posted by Sabrina22LE View Post
    In most of the cases I have heard about the child was left on purpose so the parent could run and do something and they just didn't realize how hot the car gets during that time or didnt think they would be gone that long. It happened exactly that way in my hometown. The mom left her daughter in the van while she went into the grocery store and she didn't think it was hot enough out for anything bad to happen to her child. People don't realize that it can feel mild outside and still be baking inside a vehicle. So yes. Often times uneducated
    That's not what we are talking about though. We are talking about parents who forget to drop their kid off at daycare on the way to work. The child spends 8hrs in the hot car and dies. Very different from someone who left them in the car for 5 min while they run in to grab milk.

    I Eelizah
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    #26
    Quote Originally Posted by rocket_lizz View Post
    I get it. Autopilot is a legit state of the brain and some studies have shown most people spend at least 50% of their day just "mind wandering". Being hungry, stressed, tired, distracted, etc all make it more likely for your body and brain to do it because it's a survival tactic in some ways.

    People forget where they put their keys, leave the stove on, forget to eat breakfast or other shit all the time. It's just sad that a lapse in the brain can lead to a kid's death.

    I think everyone should read this incredible story about it that came out a few years ago: https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifes...a52_story.html
    Thanks for posting that. I was trying to find it earlier but got distracted.

    Before I read this article I was of the "can't wrap my head around it" mindset too. I think it shows really well how the circumstances can line up just so to create this horrible outcome. I strongly suggest anyone who is baffled by this give it a good read through.

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    #27
    I can totally see how it would happen. I'm a SAHM so the baby is ALWAYS with me (to the point that if I go somewhere without him I automatically open the back passenger door to get him out and remember he's at home) but if I worked and DH and I traded off who took him to daycare or picked him up I can totally see that happening. Especially if it was a big important stressful day at work, etc. I think it's really important to have a system in place (we have an app that tracks diapers/sleep/breastfeeding etc but also has a pick up and drop off button for daycare that we would use if Nolan went--that way each parent communicates that the child has been successfully dropped off and if not then one parent is calling the other).
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    #28
    Quote Originally Posted by Sabrina22LE View Post
    In most of the cases I have heard about the child was left on purpose so the parent could run and do something and they just didn't realize how hot the car gets during that time or didnt think they would be gone that long. It happened exactly that way in my hometown. The mom left her daughter in the van while she went into the grocery store and she didn't think it was hot enough out for anything bad to happen to her child. People don't realize that it can feel mild outside and still be baking inside a vehicle. So yes. Often times uneducated
    There's two entirely different issues. One is people who decide to leave their kids in the car while the run to Target. That is a conscious decision. It is messed up, and illegal, but rarely leads to death, in part because those trips are usually short enough that, while it can be very uncomfortable for the kids, they aren't going to die. Again, it's not okay, at all. But it is rarely deadly, though it can be.

    The other issues is forgetting the kids are in the car. Entirely different thing. Read the article.
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    #29
    Quote Originally Posted by JaneSays View Post
    I can totally see how it would happen. I'm a SAHM so the baby is ALWAYS with me (to the point that if I go somewhere without him I automatically open the back passenger door to get him out and remember he's at home) but if I worked and DH and I traded off who took him to daycare or picked him up I can totally see that happening. Especially if it was a big important stressful day at work, etc. I think it's really important to have a system in place (we have an app that tracks diapers/sleep/breastfeeding etc but also has a pick up and drop off button for daycare that we would use if Nolan went--that way each parent communicates that the child has been successfully dropped off and if not then one parent is calling the other).
    This is very cool. I totally see the potential for accidents/confusion when the routine is carried out by a different person at different times.
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    #30
    I usually feel very sad, but mostly I feel fear because honestly, I could see this happening to me. My job is so incredibly hectic that once I get to work, my mind is there 1000%. I have forgotten to do SO many 'life' things that I mean to do during the work day because I am so caught up in everything. It has resulted in parking tickets, forgetting to let workers into my home, forgetting to call plumbers, husband etc.. that I could see my auto-pilot brain going on and forgetting a kid in the car. It frankly terrifies me.
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