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Thread: New to site-AF Girlfriend

  1. Fresh Newbie
    emilyb91's Avatar
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    #1

    New to site-AF Girlfriend

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    Hey guys!
    My name is Emily and I have been with my Airman for 2 years now. Hes reserves side so usually I don't have to deal with deployments. However he is being deployed to Kuwait and I'm having a hard time figuring out how to cope with it. Any advice on how to handle my first deployment (his second)?
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    #2
    Hey,

    Im fairly new to this site as well, I am currently dealing with my finance's deployment there. If you want to message me so we can chat about common struggles with this etc I'm here to listen and vent. It is hard but i have learned staying busy is key.
  3. Senior Member
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    #3
    Its sounds silly but its a big help is stay busy. Work, school...what ever it is try and stay busy. Get into a good routine. Don't be afraid to cry now an then but don't do it all the time. Its ok to laugh, have fun w/out them around. Pick up new hobbies. Go on trips. make sure you know the communication aspects. Or at least have an idea cause its always hard to fully know till they are in their environment.
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    #4
    Welcome!!!
  5. Regular Member
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    #5
    Hi there! I'm an Air Force girlfriend too :-) Been through three deployments, preparing for a fourth one with my airman.

    The best advice I've got for you is exactly what Margot said. Stay busy! It makes the time go by SO much faster and you're also not constantly checking your phone/email for a message or call from him 'cause you're already too busy doing other things. School really helped me pass the time by and when I wasn't in school, I just picked up extra shifts at work. I spent a ton of time with my friends and family, and I did a little bit of traveling too. But also: allow yourself to miss him and be sad he's gone. That's the biggest thing I learned after the 2nd deployment - I was too busy trying to keep busy that I didn't let myself miss him and it got exhausting for me. So let yourself miss him too!
  6. Regular Member
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    #6

    One a day post it notes

    I hate the time leading up to the deployments the most.
    Know up front, it sucks... but it won't last forever. If you have an end date, that helps. If not, then know that there is one.
    You should be able to send a care package with no trouble Emily, so you can start asking what he would like.

    One thing I have done before deployments might work for you - just an idea.
    Give him something that he can take with him (so something small) so he can read one thing a day about why you love him; what you will do when he returns; things you have done in the past that made you happy or made you laugh or whatever works for you two. Since space and weight is always an issue with baggage make it lightweight, I have used a stack of the small post it notes. One for each day I expected him to be gone (which for me is always twice as long as he says upfront). Silly, I know but since communication is not always optimal, he has that one thing he can touch and hold if he is feeling down and can't reach you. It is like an ongoing conversation. of love
    (Over the years my DH has kept them all and it is kinda' sweet.)

    Creating it kept me focused on the positive and kept me (somewhat) sane during the pre-deployment and I hope it helped him some while he was gone.

    Remember, you will get through this! You will get great advice from the people on here and reading old threads was helpful for me, so you might try that as well.
  7. Do or do not... There is no try.~ Yoda, Jedi Master
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    #7
    to MSOS. Please take a moment to read over our Everything A Newbie Needs To Know!!!thread. This is a very important sticky that will answer many of our most common newbie questions. It also has some VERY important information that every member of this site needs to read and know.
    I'm not Lynn, but we ARE MSOS Best Friends and MSOS Twins.

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