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Thread: New here, possibly geo-baching, and I have some questions. Please help!

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    #1

    New here, possibly geo-baching, and I have some questions. Please help!

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    Hello, firstly I know I will probably be bashed for some of my questions. But, my husband is about to join active duty in the Army and we are considering me staying home with our daughter due to my career and our financial situation. We have talked to 3 recruiters and they have all told us that if I am to stay here, we would still get BAH and that it wouldn't be a problem for him to stay in the barracks, even if he's stationed stateside. I've googled and it seems like that is not the case. Any advice on this would be great! Also, I'm wondering how leave works.
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    to MSOS. Please take a moment to read over our Everything A Newbie Needs To Know!!!thread. This is a very important sticky that will answer many of our most common newbie questions. It also has some VERY important information that every member of this site needs to read and know.


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    Unless there are extenuating circumstances, he would get BAH for his location (where he is stationed). You could use that to pay for expenses associated with running a household where you currently are, but the numbers would be based on his location. He would likely also have to pay for a barracks room, and may not even be allowed to live in barracks if there is no space, in which case he would have to get an apartment or find someone looking for a roommate, or whatever. So yes, he would still get BAH, and yes, he *might* be able to live in barracks, but he may have to pay for it. From the military's perspective, you guys are choosing to live apart, so it would be silly for them to be obligated to pay for 2 houses based on your personal choices. So they aren't going to foot the bill for a second home. He'll get the housing allowance to which he's entitled, and what you guys do with it is up to you, and finding a second living situation for him is also going to be up to you.

    I'd encourage you guys to read through the JTR, which can be found online. It's pretty wordy and can sometimes be tough to follow, but that is the guiding document for all this and is far better than word of mouth. To find the appropriate sections, you can google various terms. "Geo-baching" might not come up, since that's not really a term that is used officially anymore, though it's often used casually to simply mean "decided not to live together". There are cases were a spouse is not allowed to move with the service member (due to a disqualifying medical condition or unaccompanied orders, for example), and that is a much different situation.

    As with the housing situation, because this is your choice, he will get no special leave or travel allowances or accommodations. He'll get 30 days of leave per year, which he can use at the command's discretion (which means they can say no to specific dates or overly long periods, like most commands aren't going to let him be gone for month straight), and as with anyone traveling while on vacation from work, he'll pay to get himself where he wants to go.

    In order to figure out how it will work, always go back to the fact that this is your choice, and the military isn't going to pay for your choice or do anything different for him. 95% of the time, that will lead you to the answer of how it works. They give him what he gets, and if he decides to set up a second household, that's on him.
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
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    #4
    My husband and I geo-bached for a short time. Even though he is Navy I'll say what our experience was. Not sure if the Army is different.

    He got BAH for where he was stationed, not where I lived. However, he could try to get it to where BAH is for where you are. He would have to speak to a superior about how to do that. Not saying it will be approved but there are exceptions. I would be prepared for getting BAH where he is stationed though.

    As for him living in the barracks, that depends. We spent months providing paperwork stating we couldn't afford for me to pay for my household and him to pay for another in an attempt to be approved to live in the barracks. He was approved multiple times. However, when it came that time things changed what seemed like everyday. It went from; he couldn't stay there at all, to he couldn't stay there and keep BAH, to he could stay, to he could stay but only if he was the RA. It was constant back and forth. In the end he spent 3 months in the barracks and never paid before moving out due to us being done with the constant back and forth. Therefore, I would be prepared for him to not be allowed to live in the barracks and having to pay for a place in town. Some places will have plenty of room and be fine with him living there. Some places will not be fine with it no matter how much space they have. Some places may have plenty of space and then get people they have to house so they tell him he has to leave (giving him BAH, they don't have to house him).

    For leave he'll need to submit a chit and see if it gets approved. There is no special consideration. And the military will not pay for his travel expense to come see you. Every time my husband came home it was on our dime.
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    Thank you for your reply.
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    #6
    No experience with this but based on replies, since you mentioned financial situation as one of the reason to live apart, it would seem like it would make more sense financially to live together.
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    Our biggest problem financially would be leaving my job. It pays great and even with the BAH added on to his military pay, it would be quite a cut for us for me to quit. We are considering only living apart for 3 years until vehicles and debts are paid off. Just wish I knew what will happen for sure once he's stationed somewhere just so I could have a better idea for budgeting and getting things paid off. I'm not complaining at all if he isn't able to stay in the barracks and receive BAH. I completely understand the reasoning. I'm simply trying to confirm what the recruiters have told us and so far it doesn't seem like it will be as easy as they're making it out to be.
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    #8
    Sometimes living apart is worse than living together. If he can't live in the barracks and has to live on the economy he also has to pay rent and so do you at your location. It is really something to consider.
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    #9
    Some recruiters will tell you what you want to hear.

    Unless you are ordered apart, the separation cost would go on you. That is a personal choice that you would be making. You need to see what the regulations are.
    "Obstinacy is a fault of temperament. Stubbornness and Intolerance of contradiction result from a special kind of Egotism, which elevates above everything else the pleasure of its own autonomous intellect, to which others must bow.: Carl von Clausewitz
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    Has he looked in to joining the National Guard or reserves instead? It sounds like that might be a better fit for your family.
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
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