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Thread: I feel like a failure.

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    #1

    I feel like a failure.

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    I had to quit direct BF because DS has a poor latch and not only was it extremely painful, he wasn't gaining weight well. That was heartbreaking to me, but I figured at least I can still pump. My supply must have dropped from not being stimulated enough, because my supply has been steadily decreasing since we started bottle feeding and having to supplement and no matter what I do, it's just disappearing. Every time I pump I want to cry. I'm down to only getting less than 2 ounces total from both breasts in a 24-hour period. It's just like, what's the point. Maybe it's magnified because of hormones, but I'm seriously so heartbroken over this.
    Also, DD is sick with a really bad nasty bug, so my anxiety about him not getting breastmilk is through the roof because I'm terrified he's going to catch it.
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    #2
    Many, many !!! You are in NO WAY a failure!! You are a wonderful mother, and you tried the best you could to make it work.
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    #3
    and more to you - you are NOT a failure.
  4. I was the perfect mom, until I had kids.
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    #4
    As the other ladies said, you are NOT a failure. Is your baby eating? Is your baby loved? I know your answers are yes, and that's what makes you anything but a failure. You tried your best to BF, and if you choose to stop altogether, there's is absolutely nothing wrong with it. It doesn't make you less of a mother, and it definitely doesn't make you a failure because your body wouldn't cooperate.


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    #5
    Quote Originally Posted by *IGrow'EmXL* View Post
    As the other ladies said, you are NOT a failure. Is your baby eating? Is your baby loved? I know your answers are yes, and that's what makes you anything but a failure. You tried your best to BF, and if you choose to stop altogether, there's is absolutely nothing wrong with it. It doesn't make you less of a mother, and it definitely doesn't make you a failure because your body wouldn't cooperate.
    This!

    ODD is tongue tied so I didn't get to breastfeed her and pumping didn't last long for us. I hated when my milk dried up but I knew I had tried and so did you so don't beat yourself up

    ♥ 2,000oz of boobie milk donated ♥




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  6. I'm sorry for the things I said when I was hungry.
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    #6
    I couldn't breastfeed either I'm sorry I know it's really emotional




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    #7


    I remember feeling like a total failure when I couldn't breastfeed DS. Plus I had to have a csection, so I felt like I failed at my first 2 jobs as a woman and mother. But my son is perfectly healthy at 9 years old. You're not a failure. It just doesn't always happen the way we want.
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    #8
    You're not a failure! When I saw the title of this thread I wondered if mine had been bumped up because I felt exactly the same way as you -- Feel like such a failure ... -- as long as your baby is healthy and happy, that's all that matters. My son is very happy and has been healthier than a lot of babies we know. I know it's hard to not let the guilt, and what other people may say get to you, but you have done nothing wrong! I have to admit there are still times that people make me feel like crap because he wasn't/isn't breastfed, but try to ignore them - they don't understand what it's like (the majority of people who have judged me tend to be people who had no issue at all with breastfeeding).

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    #9
    You are NOT a failure. Have you had him checked for a tongue or lip tie? Kalista had BOTH plus a really small tongue and breastfeeding was impossible for us so I pumped for 6 months. I know all kinds of tips and tricks if you want any help, and I can tell you where to order some domperidone if you want to try it. Even if you give two ounces of breast milk a day that's awesome, if you give him formula that's awesome, if you manage to get your supply up or get him on the breast and do breast milk only that's awesome, too.

    There is this new movement that has been circulating lately called I Support You and it is all about making women feel empowered and supported for HOWEVER they feed their children. Here are a few blog posts about it from women who created it. Worth the read!
    http://www.fearlessformulafeeder.com...-you-movement/
    I Support You | Mama By The Bay
    This Is What Support Looks Like | Mama By The Bay

    And a Huff Post article about it.
    I Support You: The Conversation We Should Be Having About Breastfeeding And Formula


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    #10
    My sister and best friend both had babies in the past year and both had no issues with breastfeeding. They don't make me feel bad and they're very supportive but it's hard not to be jealous. Successful breastfeeding was something I was really hoping for through the whole pregnancy so it's a huge disappointment. I just can't believe how quickly my milk dried up, it makes me feel like I did something wrong. It does make me feel better to hear you all relate, thanks for all the support.

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