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Thread: What would you do?

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    #1

    What would you do?

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    There is a little girl that goes to daycare with Aria, shes between 1-2yrs. EVERY time I see her she is crying, like ugly upset crying. She will walk up to me and try to get me to take her home with me. Today when I walked up to the bldg I could hear crying and I knew exactly who it was, their room is all the way in the back so it was loud.

    I do not think the daycare worker mistreat her or anything like that, she just hates being there I guess.

    If you found out your child did this what would you do? I am glad Aria likes going right now, I am just stumped on a solution if she started acting like that.
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    #2
    I would probably never leave them again and be crying myself However, this is me speaking from my position of being able to be a SAHM and Wyatt only goes to a sitter very, very rarely. I'm really not sure how I would handle it if I HAD to leave my child and they were doing this. Probably still crying myself, though.
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    #3
    I assume the parents know how upset she is. Yeah if I were a SAHM I just wouldnt take Aria(if she was like that), but since we both work we NEED her to like it. It doesn't seem like shes unsocialized becuase she let me pick her up and then motioned to the door like LETS GO! If she was fearful I don't think she would come to me like she does.

    I really just hope its a coincidence that she is upset when I get there and that she does settle down some an enjoy it. They are always singing and reading to the kids to they try to make it fun.
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    #4
    Are you arriving at the same time each day or at different times throughout the day? If it's the former, it's quite likely she is arriving just shortly before you and this is her initial reaction to being left. A lot of kids will keep that "first x minutes" of ugly cry forever (meaning rather than just the first however many times they are left) when they are left but then go on about the rest of the day like nothing matters. If you are seeing her like this at different times throughout the day and/or when you pick your child up as well as when you are dropping her off - she may also just be an extremely emotional child who cries at everything and it happens to conincide with the times you are there.
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    #5
    I know if I were to talk Anabelle to daycare, she would cry the entire time. I am thinking about taking her a few times a month just to get her use to being away from me. But I know she will scream the whole time. I think, sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. I feel for the kid, but if parents need to get something done (like work) they have no choice in the matter.
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    #6
    Quote Originally Posted by ZivaD View Post
    Are you arriving at the same time each day or at different times throughout the day? If it's the former, it's quite likely she is arriving just shortly before you and this is her initial reaction to being left. A lot of kids will keep that "first x minutes" of ugly cry forever (meaning rather than just the first however many times they are left) when they are left but then go on about the rest of the day like nothing matters. If you are seeing her like this at different times throughout the day and/or when you pick your child up as well as when you are dropping her off - she may also just be an extremely emotional child who cries at everything and it happens to conincide with the times you are there.
    It's different times. I thought at first it might be just the inital drop off but I drop Aria off randomly and shes crying. I THINK it might be inital drop off and when somone comes and picks up a kid that upsets her. She's just really cute and I hate seeing her cry like that.

    I know there is nothing I can/need to do to help I was just curious to what other peoples opionions are just incase Aria turns out like that. Fingers crossed she stays happy!
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    Ignore it, its a phase. Go through your drop off process and get on with your day. Don't drag it out. When I did daycare it was a was a potential nightmare when a kid hit this. Some parents sit and try and make their child feel better, it never worked, often the fit became worse, and it caused a major disruption. It isn't fair to the child and it isn't fair to the other kids. Keeping the drop off routine is super important.

    Kids are weird. I had a toddler who went a few months where he lost his marbles every time anyone would come near the door. Coming, going, didn't matter who it was or what time of day. Lasted a few weeks. All the parents knew who it was and why, after the first few times they caught on and ignored it too.

    Good rule of thumb is that if you are dropping off, your kiddo is crying for a bit too long and your provider suggests handing over or physically takes the him/her from you take the hint and leave. They are trying to care for your child and also be respectful of your time since you have places to be as well.
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    #8
    Quote Originally Posted by Procella View Post
    Ignore it, its a phase. Go through your drop off process and get on with your day. Don't drag it out. When I did daycare it was a was a potential nightmare when a kid hit this. Some parents sit and try and make their child feel better, it never worked, often the fit became worse, and it caused a major disruption. It isn't fair to the child and it isn't fair to the other kids. Keeping the drop off routine is super important.

    Kids are weird. I had a toddler who went a few months where he lost his marbles every time anyone would come near the door. Coming, going, didn't matter who it was or what time of day. Lasted a few weeks. All the parents knew who it was and why, after the first few times they caught on and ignored it too.

    Good rule of thumb is that if you are dropping off, your kiddo is crying for a bit too long and your provider suggests handing over or physically takes the him/her from you take the hint and leave. They are trying to care for your child and also be respectful of your time since you have places to be as well.
    If my daycare provider physically took Aubree from me without me offering, we'd have a problem.
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    #9
    Quote Originally Posted by katinahat View Post
    If my daycare provider physically took Aubree from me without me offering, we'd have a problem.
    Parents always have the final say. Yeah, it sounds harsh, but its also brutal to see a kid screaming their head off for 15 minutes and the parent is basically egging it on. Not on purpose, no one is being uncaring, everyone is doing what is best for the child. Kids at daycare and kids at home behave differently.
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by Procella View Post
    Parents always have the final say. Yeah, it sounds harsh, but its also brutal to see a kid screaming their head off for 15 minutes and the parent is basically egging it on. Not on purpose, no one is being uncaring, everyone is doing what is best for the child. Kids at daycare and kids at home behave differently.
    With Caden, I can't even wave goodbye without him flipping out. I can't carry him in to the classroom or he clings to me. I have to allow him to walk in alone and his teacher has to engage him in an activity to distract him while I slip out. If that doesn't happen, he screams bloody murder.



    As for the OP, if that were my child I'd try and see if there was another room maybe that she could try out. While the staff may not be mistreating her per say, perhaps they aren't fully engaging her like they should. Maybe she is bored and that is why she always wants to leave. I'd also try presenting daycare as fun play time and see if that worked for my child. If all else failed, I'd ignore it and assume it was a phase. I can't skip work just because my kid is crying for me, especially being a single parent.


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