Military Significant Others and Spouse Support - MilitarySOS.com
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 13

Thread: oh no

  1. Silence is golden duct tape is silver :)
    enduser64's Avatar
    enduser64 is offline
    Silence is golden duct tape is silver :)
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Ft Benning
    Posts
    645
    #1

    oh no

    Advertisements
    so how come hubs can go out and do things but i get stuck here or anytime we go someplace i can't do anything because i have to watch baby bear and he doesn't help

    i am such a hassle

    he goes out with his cousin they pawn off the newborn they have to someone else and then want us to go out and go fishing don't you understand it is too hot outside for him to be out? don't you understand i can't go fishing because i can't leave him alone too long

    is this post partum hitting me?

    i don't pawn my child off on someone else to take care of
  2. Senior Member
    harrisonsdream's Avatar
    harrisonsdream is offline
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Posts
    52,155
    Blog Entries
    1
    #2
    tell him it's not acceptable. tell him that you didn't climb on yourself and get yourself pregnant. he needs to help. that's bullshit. tell him a "happy mom means happy baby". honestly though he is being an ass. dh pulls that really quickly and i tell him here ya go honey here's the baby i'm going out. don't give him a choic
  3. Damn it feels good to be a gangsta
    Shannon Marie's Avatar
    Shannon Marie is offline
    Damn it feels good to be a gangsta
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Tinker AFB
    Posts
    4,715
    #3
    i'm so with you. dh goes out and then comes home feeling bad because i'm with dawson 24/7. he keeps telling me to find a sitter and get out or leave him and we can do something. but i can't. i feel terrible. i want to get out, i NEED to get out, but i can't stand the idea of just dumping him off. Not yet. And especially since he has such crying spells with the reflux. I know other people can take care of him but if he's crying that much I want to be there for him. It is a total catch 22.

  4. You may call me "Lippy"
    hteew's Avatar
    hteew is offline
    You may call me "Lippy"
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Ft. Stewart
    Posts
    2,935
    #4
    I'm in the same boat and its gotten bad with me and DH. I wont get into details but if you find a solution let me know. Its seriously impacting my marriage.
    I would like to be with my for a while but thats what made me so tired in the first place!
  5. Senior Member
    SenseOfHumor's Avatar
    SenseOfHumor is offline
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    4,791
    #5
    I have someone that watches lil' bebe for me.

    My bestie out here... she has her daughter (9mo) and her husband helps... so I take lil' bebe over there when I want to go do some errands or something.

    (first time I did that... she was maybe 4 weeks old?)

    Then I take my bestie's daughter and her and her husband go out and do something.

    We trade off so I don't ever feel like I'm "pawning" lil' bebe off on her.
  6. Account Closed
    Cornbread's Avatar
    Cornbread is offline
    Account Closed
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    7,376
    Blog Entries
    2
    #6
    We have a friend here who she and her husband have gotten to be sort of our family away from family and they see us as family. B loves watching Muffin b/c she misses her nieces and nephews. We've only asked her to watch Muffin once but she was tickled pink to do it. That was for DH and I to go on a date to go see a movie, Muffin was 4 weeks old then.

    I'm sorry your DH is being like that. Have you talked to him and let him know exactly how you feel?
  7. Loving Life!
    Ellen's Avatar
    Ellen is offline
    Loving Life!
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Veteran
    Posts
    22,031
    Blog Entries
    4
    #7
    I don't think men understand how their lives are 'supposed' to change after having a baby. I don't think it's intentional either....I think that they just continue on with their lives as they would before the baby was born, and unless we moms inform them that we need them home helping us with the baby, they assume that we have it under control.

    I have often wondered what would happen with all three of my kids if I just stopped doing everything. I know that they would be ok - because Kevin would figure it out....he would have to!

    My little Loves!
  8. Silence is golden duct tape is silver :)
    enduser64's Avatar
    enduser64 is offline
    Silence is golden duct tape is silver :)
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Ft Benning
    Posts
    645
    #8
    i have asked him to help and he has no clue what to do nor any interest in learning he says to me you wanted him you got him

    the past week i watched his cousins baby mama pawn her 6wk old off on his sister and her parents so she could get riproaring drunk without having to worry

    our family bad talk you if you do something like that when they r this young kwim?
  9. MilitarySOS Jewel
    Jerzeylicious89's Avatar
    Jerzeylicious89 is offline
    MilitarySOS Jewel
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Mt. Holly
    Posts
    9,303
    Blog Entries
    1
    #9
    Quote Originally Posted by enduser64 View Post
    i have asked him to help and he has no clue what to do nor any interest in learning he says to me you wanted him you got him
    the past week i watched his cousins baby mama pawn her 6wk old off on his sister and her parents so she could get riproaring drunk without having to worry

    our family bad talk you if you do something like that when they r this young kwim?
    To the bolded, YOU NEED TO HAVE COUPLES COUNSELING as fast as possible. That thought alone, is a scary thought and it seems as if he's harboring resentful feelings towards you and the baby because you both had the child.
    NOT FAIR, NOT RIGHT...he NEEDS to MAN UP, and take repsonsibility for his WIFE and CHILD. That is what being a MAN and HUSBAND is all about.
    I don't have kids, and won't for another 5 years, but DH is already acting like he can continue his life as if I wasn't here, and I'm already planning on having him join me for a few therapy sessions because he needs to know that his actions will NOT be tolerated in this marriage. You need to do the same...oh and some therapists will allow you to bring the child.
    If you cannot get past my size and my exterior, there is no way I'm letting you know how great I am on the inside as bestsellers are not judged by their covers"
    -Me


    Back in the Pure Romance Business....visit my page at
    http://michellemcmullen.pureromance.com
    DONE WITH GRAD SCHOOL! TIME TO CELEBRATE! :

  10. You may call me "Lippy"
    hteew's Avatar
    hteew is offline
    You may call me "Lippy"
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Ft. Stewart
    Posts
    2,935
    #10
    Ok take this 2 cents for what its worth...

    Do you think he could be lashing out at you because he misses you as his wife and is jealous of the baby? I know it is probably not the best way to express it but it seems to happen sometimes with new dads. Sometimes they are so in love with their wives that they dont handle it well when all of a sudden their wife is now someone's mom and the attention they used to get is now gone. They can get pretty mad about it and don't know how to express it. Yes, it is selfish and childish but it does happen.

    Sometimes instead of talking about it, we (as moms) get more invested in the baby and more pissed with the dad for not helping and not caring. Making him sit down and talk to you about it. Tell eachother that you still love eachother and it can sometimes start to get things back on the right track. It may make him realize that by helping with the baby you will have more time for him.

    One of the things that both DH and I were freaking about but never said out loud was that he will be deploying soon. We are both afraid of what is he is going to miss (Peanut's first steps, her first words). I told him not to be afraid to fall in love with her now even though it will hurt to leave her later. He will hate himself if he waits until he is on the deployment field to watch her smile at him or to listen to her laugh.

    There may be a lot going through his head that he isn't telling you so try to talk to him and see if you can get it out of him.

    I would like to be with my for a while but thats what made me so tired in the first place!
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •