tough decision

[NavyFiance08]

I know I haven't been around too long so not a lot of you know me real well, or my situation, so here's an overview. DF and I have been dating for 3 years, engaged for just over 6 months, and are planning to get married when he gets home from deployment. I have just finished fire school, and been volunteering at a department here for just over a year. They are about to expand BIG TIME, building a brand new station and hiring between 20 and 30 new firefighters in the next year, so I have a good opportunity to get a fire job here (which in FL are few and far between).
Now here's my dilemma, I can't stand living away from DF any longer We've been apart for a year and a half, and it's been so hard! We aren't having any relationship problems, it's just the emptiness and loneliness and we are both so anxious to start our own family together and have our own house etc. I had been planning on moving to VA in May until I really got into research about Paramedic programs up there. First of all I would have to pay for the costs out of pocket because my scholarships are only good in FL, and second of all to get the same National Registry Certification that I can get in FL in one year, takes 2 years in VA. DF is planning to get out of the Navy in August of '08 so I would be moving to VA for 18 months, to move right back to FL when (if) he gets out. Also if I move to VA I have to challenge for state fire standards because I don't have national fire standards, only National EMT standards. There is so much to consider, my mind is just spinning! Everytime I think I've made a decision I wake up the next morning and end up rethinking it again....for the millionth time.
What would you all do if you were in a similar sitation, I know there will never be a perfect time to leave my life here to move to VA with him, but on the other hand I am very independent and have a hard time putting my career goals on hold even for love! ahhhhhhhhh.......I'm gonna go crazy!!

You are going to have to make this one yourself.
That is one tough decision
My mom is a paramedic in NC
Look into theirs and you can live just across the NC border and still live with your DF if it is sooner

[wolfspawprint]

Honestly, for 18 months, I would stay. I know you are excited to have a family and a house, but the education that you would receive in Florida is worth so much more. Plus, it sounds like it is going to be a lot less of a hassle. And just so you don't think I am full of it, Dh and I are doing 18 months apart while he is stationed in Gitmo. I had the opportunity to go with him, but because of my job and the training I am getting (and the experience to get my geologist's license), I stayed behind in California. Which means a difference of 3000 miles and 3 time zones. My husband is everything to me, but we both agreed that me staying here and getting the experience that I need for my license is extremely important. We take our time when we get it... and because of the distance means a big phone bill and seeing each other about every 4-5 months. We are extremely impatient to start a family and buy a house, but we know that to be able to afford both those things, my training needs to be complete.

[BigTexsGirl]

Wow .... it's a doozy....what does he have to say? If he's ok with you staying behind ... my vote is to stay...

[KevzQueen]

If I had no kids, I'd stay too. Good luck!

[Jennygirl]

My entire relationship has been long distnace, we are married and still not living together yet...If it were me, i would move...I was going to go for a certified tech program and that means everytime we move id have to retake my exam...But to me its worth being with him than continuing this distnace stuff...But your situation is different...I would talk to him about it and see what he tells you...Breezy is right, this is something you are going to have to decide for yourself...

[NavyFiance08]

Thanks for all the input ladies, we've spent countless hours talking this over, and I think we both agree and know that it is better for me to stay here in the long run. Yes, moving up there would make both of us happy NOW, but for our future my education is very important, and it will let us enjoy the rest of our lives together! Again thanks for all your input!

[*Dawn*]

Brittany,

When you talk about the fire service and being an EMT it hits home to me, I understand what you are going through. I myslef have an AS in Fire Technology/EMS...I spent 5 years working as a fire inspector in CA and when I met my first husband I gave it all up to be with him and to be honest I hate myself for doing that. Everyday I wonder what my life would be life if I hadn't. My dreams and goals were always in the fire service and like you said its hard for women to get there (ppl don't realize its still a mans world). So if it were me, its only 18 months I would stay where i'm at and get what I has always dreamed of and if he loves you that much he will understand. Plus working at a paid station you will get more days off then you will know what to do with ( you will have time to go visit him more)...I was full time and worked 7 days a month! and the best part was I was paid for full time too. Don't pass this up you might not get another chance. Also do your paramedic while you have the chance and you never know that might give you a better chance at getting a bigger job at the station and move you up quicker. but if you decided to move, I'm not sure how it works in FL but your FF1 Cert should be good in other states aswell you would just have to learn the local protocalls as into the different codes but all the UBC are the same in pretty much all states...just a few locals are different, If you do decided to move I'm sure you wouldn't have a hard time getting a VOL position somewhere or as an EMT you could also get a job at the base hospital. Good luck on your decission...