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Thread: He's in!

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    #11
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    You will be fine. Use the time he is in OCS to look at where you want to live and all in Pcola. Get on those family pages.
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    #12
    congratulations!!!!
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    #13
    Exciting!
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    #14
    Quote Originally Posted by Margot31 View Post
    You will be fine. Use the time he is in OCS to look at where you want to live and all in Pcola. Get on those family pages.
    I'm actually staying here until he gets stationed, so it'll be a couple years at least.
    I live dangerously - I drink whiskey while knitting.
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    #15
    Congrats, super exciting!
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    #16
    Quote Originally Posted by sassyspoonicus View Post
    I'm actually staying here until he gets stationed, so it'll be a couple years at least.
    Do you mean all through flight school until he is winged and goes to the FRS? If so, make sure you've looked at the finances and are aware of how that choice will affect things. You certainly wouldn't be the only one to make that choice so it is very doable, but because you are choosing not to move for what would be offered as accompanied orders, he most likely will only get BAH for his location and will have to pay for a place to live in Pcola, so you will be on your own for all expenses associated with the second household. Lots of students in the flight pipeline are looking for roommates which can help keep his costs down, but there will still be expenses.

    Also, know that the flight school schedule is extremely unpredictable and generally fairly last minute. Opportunities to take leave are even more limited than in the fleet in some ways, and there are weekend flights sometimes. So know going in to this that he will be unlikely to have much opportunity to visit you, and when you visit him, your "dates" may well consist of you quizzing him on emergency procedure flash cards. The program is deceptive because the time actually spent "at work" is generally fairly limited. But they are expected to spend so much of their own time studying, preparing, picking up extra sims, etc. If can be challenging for SOs, who see that he only has to be "in the office" 3 days this week for 5 hours each, yet is still rarely available for social time, so be aware of that. In most cases, those who get in trouble and attrite from flight school are the ones who look at the light schedule and use the rest for free time. When no one is looking or actively assigning work or expecting you to be at the squadron, it takes a lot of discipline to spend hours and hours studying, chair flying, going to study groups, getting extra sim time, and reading NATOPS. And if he is already rarely seeing you, this may create even more conflict that usual. DH and I were LD for the first part of flight school and when I visited every 6-8 weeks, it was hard because of course he wanted to hang out with me during our limited time together but he couldn't slack off, even for a long weekend, without the possibility of career-long repercussions.

    Again, I'm not telling you not to do this. Just making sure you choose it based on having all the information!
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
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    #17
    Quote Originally Posted by villanelle View Post
    Do you mean all through flight school until he is winged and goes to the FRS? If so, make sure you've looked at the finances and are aware of how that choice will affect things. You certainly wouldn't be the only one to make that choice so it is very doable, but because you are choosing not to move for what would be offered as accompanied orders, he most likely will only get BAH for his location and will have to pay for a place to live in Pcola, so you will be on your own for all expenses associated with the second household. Lots of students in the flight pipeline are looking for roommates which can help keep his costs down, but there will still be expenses.

    Also, know that the flight school schedule is extremely unpredictable and generally fairly last minute. Opportunities to take leave are even more limited than in the fleet in some ways, and there are weekend flights sometimes. So know going in to this that he will be unlikely to have much opportunity to visit you, and when you visit him, your "dates" may well consist of you quizzing him on emergency procedure flash cards. The program is deceptive because the time actually spent "at work" is generally fairly limited. But they are expected to spend so much of their own time studying, preparing, picking up extra sims, etc. If can be challenging for SOs, who see that he only has to be "in the office" 3 days this week for 5 hours each, yet is still rarely available for social time, so be aware of that. In most cases, those who get in trouble and attrite from flight school are the ones who look at the light schedule and use the rest for free time. When no one is looking or actively assigning work or expecting you to be at the squadron, it takes a lot of discipline to spend hours and hours studying, chair flying, going to study groups, getting extra sim time, and reading NATOPS. And if he is already rarely seeing you, this may create even more conflict that usual. DH and I were LD for the first part of flight school and when I visited every 6-8 weeks, it was hard because of course he wanted to hang out with me during our limited time together but he couldn't slack off, even for a long weekend, without the possibility of career-long repercussions.

    Again, I'm not telling you not to do this. Just making sure you choose it based on having all the information!
    Yup! I can support myself plus the horse plus flights down to him with what I make pretty easily. We both know it's going to be touch and go for a decent amount of time. We both had demanding STEM college degrees, so we both got used to each other being unavailable for most of the week even when we actually were living together. It's not going to be fun/easy/etc, but it'll work out.

    I need to keep my own career going too, so we both agreed that while it ain't gonna be fun, this will end up being the best choice for us. I do appreciate the information though!
    I live dangerously - I drink whiskey while knitting.
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    #18
    Perfect. Sounds like you've made a thoughtful, educated decision. I wish him the best of luck in OCS and flight school!
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
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