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Thread: Seperating...good or bad idea?

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    #1

    Seperating...good or bad idea?

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    I have questions about separating, although that option won't be for about 3 more years, its something that myself and DB have been talking a lot about recently. However I'm not sure what the right choice will be. Of course, so much could change in 3 years so who knows, but I would like some general info/advice/experiences. I just love planning, and I know in the military that is extremely difficult.

    Anyway, DB has been in the Navy for almost 11 years. He has 3 more years at the end of which he could decide to reenlist or get out. He will only have 6 more years left to reach retirement. Most people I speak to (non military) say it would be crazy for him to get out with only 6 more years left. So my basic question is, is that crazy? Now, I understand all the factors to weigh if he gets out; can he find a job that provides the same financially?, including housing/tax benefits/etc... But I guess I'm wondering, if he makes it to retirement and then gets out, what does that look like exactly? I know that may be an impossible question to answer, I'm not sure if it differs by person.

    A little more background, DB really wants to get out. Our relationship might be a factor in that, because he says he just wants to be with me, he is sick of the distance and military life in general. He reenlisted practically right before we met and he says he wishes he hadn't. I tell him that he obviously reenlisted for a reason, he wanted to stay in the Navy, but he says that he just didn't know what else he wanted to do. He had also just been on shore duty for awhile and forgot how shitty submarine life could be. He has always said though that if I wanted him to stay in that he thinks he would. He understands getting out with only 6 years left might be a bad financial decision, but I think his judgment is clouded by this shitty situation at present. Again, in 3 years so much could change, but this is our current thought process

    I apologize if that was very rambly...Anyway, I bolded the main question So if anyone has advice or experiences to share I would greatly appreciate it.
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    I wouldn't worry about it right now. You might not even be speaking in 3 years.




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    Quote Originally Posted by Whitla View Post
    I wouldn't worry about it right now. You might not even be speaking in 3 years.
    OK then
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    I have many thoughts to share but I'm stuck on my phone so only this: he can go reserves/federal job and it counts towards the 20 years. He doesn't have to stay active duty.
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    Quote Originally Posted by rocket_lizz View Post
    I have many thoughts to share but I'm stuck on my phone so only this: he can go reserves/federal job and it counts towards the 20 years. He doesn't have to stay active duty.
    Hmm, he has mentioned maybe doing reserves. Something to explore, if we're speaking in three years
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    Quote Originally Posted by CourtLove View Post
    I have questions about separating, although that option won't be for about 3 more years, its something that myself and DB have been talking a lot about recently. However I'm not sure what the right choice will be. Of course, so much could change in 3 years so who knows, but I would like some general info/advice/experiences. I just love planning, and I know in the military that is extremely difficult.

    Anyway, DB has been in the Navy for almost 11 years. He has 3 more years at the end of which he could decide to reenlist or get out. He will only have 6 more years left to reach retirement. Most people I speak to (non military) say it would be crazy for him to get out with only 6 more years left. So my basic question is, is that crazy? Now, I understand all the factors to weigh if he gets out; can he find a job that provides the same financially?, including housing/tax benefits/etc... But I guess I'm wondering, if he makes it to retirement and then gets out, what does that look like exactly? I know that may be an impossible question to answer, I'm not sure if it differs by person.

    A little more background, DB really wants to get out. Our relationship might be a factor in that, because he says he just wants to be with me, he is sick of the distance and military life in general. He reenlisted practically right before we met and he says he wishes he hadn't. I tell him that he obviously reenlisted for a reason, he wanted to stay in the Navy, but he says that he just didn't know what else he wanted to do. He had also just been on shore duty for awhile and forgot how shitty submarine life could be. He has always said though that if I wanted him to stay in that he thinks he would. He understands getting out with only 6 years left might be a bad financial decision, but I think his judgment is clouded by this shitty situation at present. Again, in 3 years so much could change, but this is our current thought process

    I apologize if that was very rambly...Anyway, I bolded the main question So if anyone has advice or experiences to share I would greatly appreciate it.
    Whether it is crazy depends on him and his priorities. If he hates the Navy, then it might be worth it to give up the retirement package in exchange for not having to work for the Navy anymore. And there are so many other factors--what are his job prospects? Would salaries outside the Navy be comparable?

    As for the "what will it look like question", I'm not sure what you are asking. If it is just what will he get, the answer is 50% of his base pay (which is much less than his entire pay) starting the day he gets out (even if he gets another job), as well as health care for life. (This is assuming that the retirement benefits don't change.)
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
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    #7
    I might've missed it in the OP, but has he thought about or said what he'd like to do if he wasn't in the navy?
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    Quote Originally Posted by rocket_lizz View Post
    I have many thoughts to share but I'm stuck on my phone so only this: he can go reserves/federal job and it counts towards the 20 years. He doesn't have to stay active duty.

    Are you talking about a GS job? Those do not count toward the 20 years required to get a military retirement. You can buy your years of military service and the right to add those to GS retirement time, but the GS retirement system is not the same as the military system, and you can't use GS time to finish 20 and get a military retirement package.

    Reserve time does go toward getting 20 years and a military retirement. Federal does not. If you buy the right to use the military time, it adds to time toward federal retirement, but not toward military retirement.
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
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    #9
    Quote Originally Posted by villanelle View Post
    Whether it is crazy depends on him and his priorities. If he hates the Navy, then it might be worth it to give up the retirement package in exchange for not having to work for the Navy anymore. And there are so many other factors--what are his job prospects? Would salaries outside the Navy be comparable?

    As for the "what will it look like question", I'm not sure what you are asking. If it is just what will he get, the answer is 50% of his base pay (which is much less than his entire pay) starting the day he gets out (even if he gets another job), as well as health care for life. (This is assuming that the retirement benefits don't change.)
    To the bolded, that is essentially what I was asking, thank you. His job prospects are unknown at this point, which is something that scares me, but doesn't seem to worry him. He says he would like to go back to school, but he doesn't know exactly what for yet. I want nothing more than to just tell him to get out as soon as possible, but I understand the reality of that is harsh and I wish he would focus more on that.


    Quote Originally Posted by sldanlm View Post
    I might've missed it in the OP, but has he thought about or said what he'd like to do if he wasn't in the navy?
    He says he would like to go to school but he doesn't know exactly what for yet. I think the military has kind of been a shelter for him, maybe he doesn't fully understand just how difficult getting work is.
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    #10
    I would encourage him to stay in tbh. It's six years. It seems like a waste of 14 years to get out at that point to me.
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