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Thread: Chief select spouse group

  1. Old Newbie
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    #1

    Chief select spouse group

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    I always find myself in atypical situations when it comes to navy life.

    Hubs is a navy recruiter ever since I met him, so I don't know anything about deployments, sea/shore duty, etc. As a result, "normal" navy things don't apply to us. He picked up chief this year and I'm really happy for him, but I have a lot of questions about what to expect with a recruiting command indoctrination.

    He's been telling me he'll prob disappear for 6 weeks so I'm mentally prepared for that, but I guess I'd just like to talk to other NCC select wives to go through the process together.

    Does anyone know of a person I can speak to, or maybe a group I can join? Heck, I wouldn't even be opposed to starting my own Facebook group for us, I just hate not knowing!

    I've seen previous posts about how there are dinners for selectee wives, handbooks, q&a's and I'm just here like "what about me??" Lol.

    Thanks if you got this far!
  2. Livin~Lovin~Laughin
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    #2
    You can always ask us questions here. Many of us are either military spouses of a Chief or former CPO's.

    You husband's command should have had a meet and greet for him. They should also have a spouse briefing. If they didn't let me know. I can find out for you through a group of CPO's that I chat with. .

    He is going to be busy because not only will he be in CPO 365 training but he still needs to do his job. He is going to have homework, things to memorize, reports to write, books to read, etc. He's going to have to meet with the selects in his region to do fun raisers and prepare for trainings. The "day of" he will be gone pretty much ALL day. When he finally gets home, he's going to be worn out. You can help him by just being supportive and understanding. We already have spouses threatening to leave, file IG complaints, ect. DON'T be that spouse. Please. I had that spouse (who is now my EX) and he made things very hard for me. It sucks because if you have kids you are going to feel like a single parent for a while. Just remember, it's only temporary and in the end you will both be better for it.

    There's no difference between rates (in general) so you can pretty much link up with any milspouse that has a SO going through the process.

    Please feel free to PM me if you have any questions.





    "Don't worry about being right,
    just worry about being kind."
    ~Tilly Therber
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    #3
    Thank you so much, karma! I realized even though we're in a recruiting command, non-NCs made chief so they are prob tailoring it to all "flavors" lol. It's just different from a regular command in that we don't have ombudsmans, fleet and family support center, etc. (I know bc I was an ombudsman at our previous command). no one has approached me or guided me as far as what I should expect, so all I know is what hubs tells me or what I read online. I suggested to hubby that he ask the other selectees if their spouses wanted to make up a FB group so we could provide support. Do you think I'd get in trouble for doing something like that? Hubby replied saying one of the selects wife doesn't even speak English! Luckily I speak Spanish so ill def help her out, but yes, if you could point me to the right direction as far as what to expect, how I can help, etc, I'd really appreciate it. I have it engrained in my head not to be upset if he's not around but I swear the universe is testing me today, lol! I had to wrangle a 4 year old and a 15 month old in a laundromat that had no ac AND a funky dead mouse smell just came about in our garage and I will dieeee if I have to find it and dispose of it myself. "All for a good cause" is what I'm gonna sharpie on my forehead for the next 6 weeks...
  4. Livin~Lovin~Laughin
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    #4
    The training should be standard across the board with some differences but not "rate" specific. The best thing you can do is be understanding, offer help, and try to do as much as you can on your own so he's not feeling anymore over whelmed than he has to be.





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  5. Livin~Lovin~Laughin
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    #5
    Your husband should be briefed on Monday and should get a date for the "Spouse Meet and Greet." If you don't hear anything let me know and I can get you a POC





    "Don't worry about being right,
    just worry about being kind."
    ~Tilly Therber
  6. Regular Member
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    #6
    Hi! I can answer questions also. Your husband should have a sponsor. Generally the Sponsor's wife is supposed to reach out to the Select's wife and guide her through the process. I have found that in some Mess' this is not necessarily the truth. The local recruiters that were selected are joining the Tinker Mess for the season.

    My best advise to you is to breathe. The season is only six weeks and is very worth it in the end. PM me if you have questions, I will do my best to give you straight and honest answers.
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    #7
    In all my years in the Chief's mess and since being married to a SCPO I have NEVER heard of this. The committee will set up the meet and greet for the spouses so they can meet one another and ask questions.

    My husband has sponsored more than a few new CPO's and I have never been asked to guide the spouse, and I can tell you when I made Chief, there was no one trying to guide my then spouse, at least until he threatened to go to the IG over some ish.

    Quote Originally Posted by TACAMO_Sweetie View Post
    Hi! I can answer questions also. Your husband should have a sponsor. Generally the Sponsor's wife is supposed to reach out to the Select's wife and guide her through the process. I have found that in some Mess' this is not necessarily the truth. The local recruiters that were selected are joining the Tinker Mess for the season.

    My best advise to you is to breathe. The season is only six weeks and is very worth it in the end. PM me if you have questions, I will do my best to give you straight and honest answers.





    "Don't worry about being right,
    just worry about being kind."
    ~Tilly Therber
  8. You are here.
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    #8
    Quote Originally Posted by TACAMO_Sweetie View Post
    Hi! I can answer questions also. Your husband should have a sponsor. Generally the Sponsor's wife is supposed to reach out to the Select's wife and guide her through the process. I have found that in some Mess' this is not necessarily the truth. The local recruiters that were selected are joining the Tinker Mess for the season.

    My best advise to you is to breathe. The season is only six weeks and is very worth it in the end. PM me if you have questions, I will do my best to give you straight and honest answers.
    ditto....in mobile this happened, they had sponsors and their spouses who would guide the member and the spouse. here I think the chief's wives just guide them, not necessarily in the same rate since some are divorcees and others have wives stateside that don't really want much to do with the military. So the two that are here are guiding the one spouse right now.
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    #9
    Yeah I never had a spouse of a CPO contact me to guide me when dh was selected nor have I been asked to do so when dh sponsored CPO Selects, either. Probably would have been nice to have, though.

    When dh was going through indoc I did everything I could to help him, I read the books, did the reports, did the online training courses, made his costume for some fund raiser, did his eggs, etc. Sure he was supposed to do all that but with regular work still needing to be done it was a lot so I took some of the load off. I barely saw him during the 6 weeks since he was so busy! With this new CPO365 I have no idea how it will play out for the new CPO Selects.
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    #10
    The best thing you can do for him is just be understanding that e won't be around much and if he is he'll be busy reading/doing homework or sleeping. And be supportive. Ask if there is something you can do to help ease his load. When DH made it I made food for fundraisers, did shopping for items he needed. I even had an open door where other guys would come take a shower cause we lived the closest to base.

    There was a gathering where the selects and their wives met the CMC and his wife but I wasn't in town then so I missed it. CMC did call me though and let me ask any questions I had. Last year DH was a sponsor and I stayed in contact with his wife. I would have went to the pinning but they had it in the morning and I had an OB appt. and had to get YDS to school. I also missed the khaki ball cause I had just had YDD. But DH did go to show his support to the new chiefs, especially the one he sponsored.

    The day of DH's pinning was in the evening and after being gone all day and overnight DH was exhausted. He could barely keep his eyes open so we did our celebration the next day.
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