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Conversation Between supsavy and navynukegf12

40 Visitor Messages

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  1. Always here to listen, I am sorry you are hurting so much. Stay strong. If it was meant to be then it was meant to be. Dont blame yourself for feeling "over emotional" I would have the same reaction as you did. We all want someone to care about us, especially if we care so deeply about them. And you know what? If he is going out "enjoying his new life" you go out and do the same, you deserve it.
  2. That was Saturday night. He actually text me last night to ask what we were going to do about Thanksgiving since I was supposed to go visit. I told him that I can't if he didn't know how he felt, that I didn't see the ppoint. The he said "so you're just going to waste all that money?" So I asked what he thought the point of me going was, haven't heard from him since. I feel like my while world is falling apart. I barely made it through work this mmorning and I'm sitting in my car crying my eyes out but I have class in 15 minutes so Im trying to stop. It just hurts so much. Sometimes I feel like the man who told me all those sweet thinga in bc is gone. Sometimes I feel like this is all my fault for being such an emotional person. I just wanted him to care, but I know you can't make someone care. He's too busy enjoying his new life and partying with his friends that I know that he doesn't care if he looses me. I always knew breaking up was a possibility but I never actually imagined, I really did think we'd spend our lives together. I'd give anything to have him back but I know I can't beg. I just want to make this pain go away. I want to be able to eat again. I want to concentrate on school and my internship. I want to be happy. But I'm having so much trouble. Thanks for listening. I'm going to at least attempt going to class
  3. how long ago was that? I think it was smart to put it in his hands...I know it's hard to get the courage to do that. I know it doesn't mean much from someone behind a computer screen, but if you ever need someone to talk to or are having a hard day, I am here for you. It always helps me to get things off my chest and talk to someone. I'm sorry.
  4. Well, the roller coaster is over. I asked him whether he loved me or even wanted to be with me anymore because I thought when he told me he didn't know last time it was because he was annoyed. Well... his answer was the same. I feel like I can't keep this going if he doesn't know. I'm sure of my feelings and I can't pretend like everything is OK knowing that he might not love him anymore. So I told him that I still loved him but that we can't keep doing this. That he needs to figure out how he feels because if he doesn't know then we're both wasting our time. That I know I've made mistakes, but I wasn't the only one. That I was willing to keep trying to make it work but that if he realized he wasn't in this anymore that I don't want him to contact me again. And that if that was the last I heard from him that I loved him to the moon and back (I used to always tell him that when he was in bc) and that I wished him the best. Haven't heard from him since... needless to say I've been doing a lot of crying. But I keep telling myself that the guy I fell in love with is gone, the sweet guy is wrong and has been replaced by this robot. It hurts so much that I can barely bare it but I know in the end it'll be better for both of us. Sorry to have made this all about me. So glad your family is OK with the engagement! And I'm so sorry to hear about your sister. It seems like all her issues aren't with your boyfriend but more internal.
  5. it sounds like a big roller-coaster. I think it's a great idea to attempt to go to Mexico, that could really show how much he is willing to put into the relationship. I am so sorry at how things are going. It sounds like you really invested a lot into him and love him otherwise you wouldn't be bothered by all of this. I'm sorry to hear you are having more bad days than good at this point...especially if you cry more than not. I really think you need to think about what is best for you and what makes you happy. Yay for the internship though! I have been doing great, for the most part anyway. That's why I haven't been going on here as much so I apologize for the late response. Also my internet has been on the fritz so that makes it extra hard to turn in homework for school:/ . I told my extended family about the big news and it went better than I thought, just the expected "you are so young". But they felt a lot better knowing that I was waiting. I think I am mostly disappointed with my sisters reaction, she cried...not out of joy but because she doesn't like him and she wants to feel good about being the maid of honor (she told me that she didn't know if she wanted to be mine if I was going to marry him). Things have just been hard with her, she doesn't even seem like herself anymore. She started drinking a lot, smoking, and now she has an eating disorder (she has been fighting this or a while but it has gotten bad). I am more comfortable with DFs family then I am with her
  6. And now my mom keeps asking me if he can go to Mexico with us in December for my patents 25th anniversary and I'm scared to ask him because I fear him saying no and if he says no I'll have to decide between staying here for him or going to Mexico for my parents. I'm scared that he won't make an effort for me and go for a few days (if he's allowed) and that'll prove our relationship is over. I asked him a while ago if he was allowed to go and he said he would ask but I don't think he ever did. I'm trying not take it personally since he's never been good at planning ahead, I was always the one that had to remind him. So I'm basically just one big anxious mess, but I'm playing it cool. So far he's text me good morning and goodnight everyday and asked about my day and told me about his soooo I don't really know what's going on. On a happier note I actually did get the internship! how are you doing??
  7. Yea... things with DB aren't so great right now. He told me he wasn't sure if he loved me anymore or wanted to be with me. It was kind of my fault, I called him telling him I wasn't sure if I could do this anymore. He said he was annoyed with all my over emotional-ness. I just hate how everything in his life comes before me, I knew the navy would always come first but his friends and motorcycle always come before me too. I get that he's just bonding with his new friends but I hardly talk to him on weekdays because of school and weekends are for his friends. He's usually the first one to text me though, but this whole situation just sucks. He's always kind of been an emotionally detached person, but it's really starting to effect me. Today is the first day in a week when I did not cry. Now he's acting normal, like he never said those things about possibly not wanting to be with my anymore. I have been overly emotional lately so I kind of get where he's coming from but now I don't know where wr stand. During that sucky phone call I told him that I loved him as much as I did before he left to bootcamp and he said he didn't, and then he said that that's what I wanted to hear. I don't think we've ever had a fight this big but I'm just leaving it alone.
  8. I'm just happy he is at the point where he doesn't regret it anymore. I'm sorry to hear things haven't gotten better for you. Do you tell him that you love him and get nothing in response? Who is the one who normally starts a conversation? If you don't text him back would he send you another? You need to do what is best for you at this point, he did what he thought was best for him by joining. I'm sorry about your internship. Just try try again, Danny Divito went on over 100 auditions before he got his first part
  9. Aww I'm sorry to hear he's having such a hard time, but it's good that you're being so supportive. Hopefully he eventually gets to the point where he's happy he joined, or at least indifferent. Eh, idk if the trip is even going to happen. Things aren't great between DB and I. The sad part is I don't think he even notices that things aren't OK. I'm just so emotionally drained and I feel like I'm not part of his life anymore. I miss him being in bootcamp because he'd actually tell me how important I am to him, or was. At this point I very well may not be important anymore. I get absolutely nothing now, maybe an I love you like once a week. I might just be a bit overly hormonal since my time of the month is coming up lol but at this point I think I may need some space. I'm also bummed because I applied for an internship at a hospital and I'm pretty sure I didn't get it:/
  10. That's not weird at all. I know where you are coming from. I feel a little hint of lonely jealousy whenever he says he is out shooting pool or hanging out with the guys and all I am doing is sitting at home doing homework and thinking of him ahah. I know he needs some time to relax though, he is really having a hard time. I think he actually regrets joining, and that's hard for me to know, it is easy to make the best of things when you know your SO is doing what they want and love...he actually apologized for joining and "putting me through this" (I don't remember ever complaining about him joining, sure it is hard but he doesn't need to hear that from me). I'm so excited to hear you are going to see him ! I am sure you just want to speed it up already. I bet your DB is really excited too
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