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Thread: Making the move to marriage

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    #1

    Love Making the move to marriage

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    Hey everyone!

    I just want to get to know people here a little bit, and learn more about relationships, and thought this could be a good way to do that! So, my question is for those of you who are married, or know you're dating the person you will marry, what was the transition from "we're dating" to "we're going to get married" like? And how long after you started dating did it take for you? I think my DB and I are beginning that transition and I'm curious about other people's stories. Thanks for sharing!
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    #2
    I knew DH for about 8 years, and we casually dated a bit on and off (as geography allowed) before we really started a relationship. So that no doubt sped things up and allowed them to happen more quickly than if we didn't have a long history of friendship. We already really knew a lot about each other. We were super close in high school (where we met) and stayed in touch (sometimes literally ) during the college years, before we finally started dating seriously. We were dating for about 10 months before we got engaged (and then engaged for about 9 months). I'm not really sure at what people we started talking marriage. While I wasn't expecting the proposal when it came because he'd told me he was going to wait until he finished a training that still had another few months, I did know we were going to get married, and I know we'd discussed it at various points. But I can't really recall how the conversations came up. It just sort of happened organically.
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    #3
    DB and I have been together for about a year and a half and have recently been discussing getting engaged/married before he gets transferred next year. It seems pretty much a natural progression for me, we've been together for a while, we live together the next obvious step is to get engaged and married. I'm just waiting for the ring now since he keeps telling me he has a "plan"
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    #4
    My DH and I met in high school. Stupid silly way of meeting, it was one of those turn-about dances where the girls ask the guys. I was two years younger and had a massive crush on him because we both took an elective photography class (ok ... yes we met in the darkroom but nothing funny!). A few of my friends dared me to ask him (mind you he was a senior and I was a sophomore) to this dance. Good Lord I never thought he would say yes.

    He accepted and he we started dating and it got pretty serious during his senior year. He got accepted to the AF academy and left the next year. We had a LDR for the rest of my high school years but we kept it together. When I graduated from high school he asked me to marry him. We had talked about it but I had never mentioned it to my mom or dad. I didn't say yes right away and told him I had to think about it. He still teases me to this day that I had my doubts... I just needed to think ... Good Lord .. that is a big decision. And I had to talk to my mom and dad.

    In the end both my mom and dad loved him to death. I feel like I am one of the lucky ones who lived the fairy tale. We ended up, within the year, having our first child (not planned ...opps) and he was deployed a year or so later and I started my journey into this goofy life. Another child and many years later and we are still very much in love. I am blessed.
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    #5
    DF and I were together for roughly a year and a half before he proposed. We talked about marriage and family incredibly early on in the relationship and it just felt right! When we get married we will have been together for about 3 years. I think the transition happened naturally.
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    #6
    I met DH at the end of high school. We dated during the summer and he proposed just before he shipped to boot camp. We dated long distance for a full year after he joined and then got married. Next month we will have been together for 9 years.




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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by oinkpig329 View Post
    Hey everyone!

    I just want to get to know people here a little bit, and learn more about relationships, and thought this could be a good way to do that! So, my question is for those of you who are married, or know you're dating the person you will marry, what was the transition from "we're dating" to "we're going to get married" like? And how long after you started dating did it take for you? I think my DB and I are beginning that transition and I'm curious about other people's stories. Thanks for sharing!
    I am currently dating the LOML and I would say after like 2 months after we said I love you , I realized that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him . We have been talking ALOT more about marriage and I am excited to see what the future holds for us ! But in any relationship I think you just build up to that point but when you know someones the ONE you'll know for sure trust me :smile
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    #8
    I met DF about 6 years ago. He was married and I was living with my former partner. He was an acquaintance to both my former partner and I, we belonged to the same special interest organization. My former partner passed away, and a couple of years later DF got divorced. We eventually started doing things together (didn't want to even call it dating because neither of us were looking for another relationship, just enjoying mutual friendship.) Things progressed in our relationship and I moved in with him. Marriage, as in marital status or the ceremony has never been important to me. I never grew up hoping I'd get "married" some day. I know this is a lifetime relationship with or without the license. Being married is something more important to other people like family than to me. DF and I however mutually decided to someday start a family of our own, and because of that we are getting married.

    As far as when I knew this would be a committed lifetime relationship, I probably knew in the back of my mind early on, but maybe had denial about it. I never dated anyone for a couple of years after my former partner passed away. I guess I didn't want to get into another serious relationship and take the chance of it ending, memories of my former partner, IDK. I was in a bad way emotionally for a while. Anyway, things are better now, and my DF and I are looking forward to a new chapter in our lives.
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    #9
    I met my DF (DH next month) in middle school. I was in 7th grade and he was in 8th grade. We HATED each other. Literally bullied each other! When we got to high school we became best friends. He did not confess his feelings to me until the week before our high school graduation. I had gotten out of an abusive 3 year relationship two months earlier , which through it all he stuck by my side. He confessed his feelings, and I totally brushed him off. I didn't believe it. It wasn't until I saw how he cheered me on at graduation while I walked the stage with happy tears in his eyes that I realized his feelings were genuine and I too shared them back. Unfortunately, his family moved to another state 4 hours away after grad. We were long distance for 3 months before he moved in with me. We were dating for 5 months before he proposed. Now we are getting married after he gets out of bootcamp, next month. Marriage came up the very first day we started dating when he asked me to be his. He got down on one knee and said "Will you be my girlfriend and future wife?". He shares the same belief that I do, that dating is for potential marriage. He was the first to say I love you, the first to mention marriage, and it just felt natural seeing that we had a long term friendship history, which is why it isn't scary that we are moving fast.
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    #10
    DH and I were together about 5 months when we moved in together and started talking marriage a month later. I knew that things were different with DH from the very beginning and therefore knew the relationship wasn't going to end up like previous relationships of mine. We actually got engaged (ring on my finger) after a little over a year together and got married a little over a year later.


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