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View Poll Results: Should You Swallow Your Pride?

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Thread: Should You Have to "Swallow You Pride"?

  1. Senior Member
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    #1

    Should You Have to "Swallow You Pride"?

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    UPDATE on page 2.


    My question is this:

    If you are at a stalemate regarding something that happened in your relationship, that one person thinks X should have happen or X is what was the right thing, and the other thinks differently, should you ever have to NOT come to an agreement about it? Meaning, you try to discuss each persons's feelings, and thoughts on what happened. But one person refuses to acknowledge any other point of view but their own, and refuses to come to any sort of agreement or conclusion about what happened, doesn't even TRY to understand where the other person was coming from.

    Should one person have to just call it quits and allow the other to think what happened is what should happen in the future? Should one person have to let it not be solved? Are there times where you should "swallow your pride," let the other person be right and unacknowledge your feelings, and hope the issue does not come up again in the future?

    I know a lot of people say "pick your battles" and "just swallow your pride." So should that really happen in a serious discussion?
    Last edited by SamanthaAniwaya; 02-11-2015 at 12:49 PM.
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    #2
    Depends on what it was

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    #3
    Quote Originally Posted by SamanthaAniwaya View Post
    My question is this:

    If you are at a stalemate regarding something that happened in your relationship, that one person thinks X should have happen or X is what was the right thing, and the other thinks differently, should you ever have to NOT come to an agreement about it? Meaning, you try to discuss each persons's feelings, and thoughts on what happened. But one person refuses to acknowledge any other point of view but their own, and refuses to come to any sort of agreement or conclusion about what happened, doesn't even TRY to understand where the other person was coming from.

    Should one person have to just call it quits and allow the other to think what happened is what should happen in the future? Should one person have to let it not be solved? Are there times where you should "swallow your pride," let the other person be right and unacknowledge your feelings, and hope the issue does not come up again in the future?

    I know a lot of people say "pick your battles" and "just swallow your pride." So should that really happen in a serious discussion?
    Honestly, this was a little confusing to follow with all the "one person" and "other person" stuff...

    I agree with Andrea. It depends what the issue is. There are times when proving you're right isn't always worth it. But, with nothing to go off of in this post, its a little hard to give an opinion....




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    #4
    Quote Originally Posted by idratherbehiking View Post
    Honestly, this was a little confusing to follow with all the "one person" and "other person" stuff...

    I agree with Andrea. It depends what the issue is. There are times when proving you're right isn't always worth it. But, with nothing to go off of in this post, its a little hard to give an opinion....
    This. If it's a big relationship related issue I think there should definitely be discussion and compromise, no one should ever refuse to acknowledge their spouses opinion either. DH and I don't agree on plenty of things but there isn't really any battle about it, we just hear each other out and go from there.
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    #5
    Quote Originally Posted by HisCrazyGirl View Post
    This. If it's a big relationship related issue I think there should definitely be discussion and compromise, no one should ever refuse to acknowledge their spouses opinion either. DH and I don't agree on plenty of things but there isn't really any battle about it, we just hear each other out and go from there.
    Yup this. We can disagree on many things but we'd never refuse to see another's point of view. That being said I've never been one to argue for the sake of pride. I had an older brother who loooooooved to argue just to argue. It took me awhile but I finally figured out that I didn't have to argue to be right.
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    #6
    Quote Originally Posted by idratherbehiking View Post
    Honestly, this was a little confusing to follow with all the "one person" and "other person" stuff...

    I agree with Andrea. It depends what the issue is. There are times when proving you're right isn't always worth it. But, with nothing to go off of in this post, its a little hard to give an opinion....
    yep it was a little bit confusing and I agree it is up to what the problem is. But I also think is it important or worth to always find a middle way.. Can a couple not have 2 different opinions and still be ok with.
    Dh and I have a few different opinion, we listen to each other and respect each others opinion and good.
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    #7
    It depends. I mean if I want to paint the walls yellow and he wants them blue, the walls are going to end up yellow and yeah, he's gonna suck it up. If it's something like investing money or buying a car or defining boundaries? You talk and talk until it's worked out.
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    #8
    Not every issue has to be handled in a mature "adult" manner with an open honest discussion of feelings and seeing the other persons side, etc.
    It's called setting priorities and value.
    some issues are not worth the time or energy.
    whether the thermostat will be set at 67 or 68 degrees. She wants it 68? Fine. Because it's not worth the time or energy to do anything more than say "yes, ma'am."

    Remember there is a difference between swallowing your pride on an occasion or three, and becoming a person's doormat.
    if I am become fat because I swallow (my pride) all the time then it may not be a relationship I should be in, that or I need to grow a backbone and stand up for myself.
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    #9
    Ok am I the only one that initially read the title all wrong & that this was in love shack & think this would be a whole different discussion?

    For some reason my tablet cut off the title after "swallow"

    Ok, that aside.

    DH and I don't agree on everything. But I never look at it as a swallow your pride thing, it's more of a compromise and do I want to be happy. He can know I disagree, but at the same time knowing I respect his opinion. We actually don't agree on religion but he lets me have my beliefs and I let him have his.

    We run into problems when we feel like one person bulldozes another, which we try not to do. But it's also a pick your battles sort of thing.

    One thing I've learned with DH is, do I want to be right or do I want to be happy? I can't fight with him without also hurting myself and likewise.
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by CPANavyWife View Post
    DH and I don't agree on everything. But I never look at it as a swallow your pride thing, it's more of a compromise and do I want to be happy. He can know I disagree, but at the same time knowing I respect his opinion. We actually don't agree on religion but he lets me have my beliefs and I let him have his.

    We run into problems when we feel like one person bulldozes another, which we try not to do. But it's also a pick your battles sort of thing.

    One thing I've learned with DH is, do I want to be right or do I want to be happy? I can't fight with him without also hurting myself and likewise.
    Basically all of this! Some things I have just learned to accept in my relationship and others we absolutely have to figure out.
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