Military Significant Others and Spouse Support - MilitarySOS.com
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 23

Thread: s/o saying "i love you"

  1. Senior Member
    cassadilla's Avatar
    cassadilla is offline
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    17,907
    #1

    s/o saying "i love you"

    Advertisements
    The "i love you" thread reminded me of a conversation my co workers and i had in the back room the other day and i thought it'd be a good topic!

    A co-worker says that you don't love somebody until at least a year, and that anything before that is just lust. I disagree and think that every relationship is different and you can love someone a lot earlier than that (ex and i said it 5 months in). What is your opinion?
    Last edited by cassadilla; 07-24-2013 at 08:57 AM. Reason: wrong word somewhere! oops
  2. Senior Member
    dolphindm04's Avatar
    dolphindm04 is offline
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    8,237
    #2
    Quote Originally Posted by cassadilla View Post
    The "i love you" thread reminded me of a conversation my co workers and i had in the back room the other day and i thought it'd be a good topic!

    A co-worker says that you don't love somebody until at least a year, and that anything before that is just love. I disagree and think that every relationship is different and you can love someone a lot earlier than that (ex and i said it 5 months in). What is your opinion?
    Did they mean just "puppy love" before a year?

    I don't agree with the statement though, it's different for everyone. No set amount of time will change how you feel. Granted, relationships evolve and change with time...but if you love someone, you love them. Falling out of love, another story.
  3. Senior Member
    cassadilla's Avatar
    cassadilla is offline
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    17,907
    #3
    Quote Originally Posted by dolphindm04 View Post
    Did they mean just "puppy love" before a year?

    I don't agree with the statement though, it's different for everyone. No set amount of time will change how you feel. Granted, relationships evolve and change with time...but if you love someone, you love them. Falling out of love, another story.
    it was suppose to say lust. i fixed it!
  4. be silly. be honest. be kind.
    Jenni Penni's Avatar
    Jenni Penni is offline
    be silly. be honest. be kind.
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    10,484
    #4
    I believe that love is an evolving thing, so I can love somebody after a day and after a few years but it will be two different kinds of love.

    Based on that, I don't think it matters how long it's been. You can decide that you love somebody whenever you want to. You can also love a person and lust for them at the same time.

    "The purpose of life is not to simply be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well."
    - Ralph Waldo Emerson

  5. MilitarySOS Jewel
    HisCrazyGirl's Avatar
    HisCrazyGirl is offline
    MilitarySOS Jewel
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    6,641

    #5
    I do agree that you can love someone before a year. Everyone's life and relationships are different and, IMO, can't be put in a molded time line. I will say in my experience while I thought I loved DH when I told him "I love you" the first time" I was 16 and I didn't really know what love was looking back. What I felt when I married him was much different than the puppy love I had at 16. So I also think that for some people, like myself, puppy love and real love can get mixed up, particularly at a younger age.
  6. Senior Member
    Heisenberg's Avatar
    Heisenberg is offline
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Location
    South Florida
    Posts
    16,413
    #6
    I don't agree with that. I don't understand how you can love somebody after a week of knowing them or anything but I definitely don't think you have to be with them that long. I think love changes and evolves the longer you're together and it can become a different sort of love, but I think you can absolutely love someone early on.
  7. Wibbly, wobbly, timey, wimey stuff.
    Potsticker's Avatar
    Potsticker is offline
    Wibbly, wobbly, timey, wimey stuff.
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Orlando, FL
    Posts
    4,016
    #7
    I agree with whomever said love is an evolving thing. Imo love always begins as puppy love, but over time, it grows. Puppy love can still be there, or it can fade away, but a deeper love, I feel can grow very quickly if it's with the right person.
  8. Banned
    gunsgirl's Avatar
    gunsgirl is offline
    Banned
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    lost
    Posts
    17,275
    #8
    I cannot say that I "loved" Dh the day we met, but that there was a strong connection to him. I knew I loved him shortly after meeting him.
    also over time the love has changed, but I love him so completely , unconditionally that I could not imagine not loving him.
  9. Sometimes the best gifts come in the smallest packages.
    Phoenixx.'s Avatar
    Phoenixx. is offline
    Sometimes the best gifts come in the smallest packages.
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Location
    Fairbanks, AK
    Posts
    2,073

    #9
    Honestly, four years ago I would have agreed. Then, just under four years ago I met DH and that changed within a day.
    I walked in the room, saw him, and something inside me clicked. No, I don't believe in love at first sight, but I do believe that a person can love someone within a few days of speaking with them. I knew I loved him before we even technically started dating (which was three days later). We didnt say it to each other for three weeks, but it was there and we knew it was. And the love I felt then was so unbelievably different than the puppy love I felt for the guy I dated right before him.
    I guess the best way to put it is I fell hard and fast and I think that it is completely possible to love someone before a year, or even a week.



  10. Senior Member
    CC22's Avatar
    CC22 is offline
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    Together in the Hood!
    Posts
    2,119
    Blog Entries
    22
    #10
    I think I loved DH after our 3rd date (we talked for about a month online before meeting in person). DH changed my mind about soul mates and love at first sight and all that stuff. I think love (NOT lust) at first sight does exist. I think it happens pretty rarely though.

    So yeah, I think you can actually, truly love someone before knowing them a year. And I agree with other posters that love def changes over time.
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •