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Thread: So so Confused.

  1. Fresh Newbie
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    #1

    So so Confused.

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    Hi all. I have been seriously dating a military man for 2 months and everything has been amazing.

    Three days ago however, he called me and didn't sound like himself. I assumed he was tired because I knew he was up late the night before with his friends (he drinks quite a bit when he doesn't have his kids). To make a long story short, he killed the family cat that afternoon when he was all alone at his house because she bit him.

    I am so traumatized by it, I don't know what to do. I don't even know how to talk about it with him. When he told me what he had done, it was the creepiest phone conversation I have ever had and I did everything I could just to get off the phone with him because I couldn't process what he just told me. Honestly, the worse part is I don't think he has any remorse over it either.

    Is this a result of PTSD?? What do I do?? I have heard him and other guys and his unit make fun of others with PTSD and those that get help for PTSD. They make the comment that they just need to 'push it in deep, real deep'. So to encourage him to get help, I don't even know where to start. Or should I just run? Run faaaaaar away from this whole situation? I don't want to run because I know he is a good person, but I also don't want to be scared for my safety, his kids safety if he refuses to get help.

    Any help from anyone that has been in a similar situation, would be much appreciated. Thank you!
  2. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    #2
    He killed the cat?!

    Honestly, that's a big red flag/safetly concern, PTSD or not.
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    #3
    omg!!! that is crazy. I would suggest to him that he get help and that is not normal and then I would run!!!!!
  4. Fresh Newbie
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    #4

    Confused and want to help. Should I?

    Hi all. I have been seriously dating a military man for 2 months and everything has been amazing.

    Three days ago however, he called me and didn't sound like himself. I assumed he was tired because I knew he was up late the night before with his friends (he drinks quite a bit when he doesn't have his kids). To make a long story short, he killed the family cat that afternoon when he was all alone at his house because she bit him.

    I am so traumatized by it, I don't know what to do. I don't even know how to talk about it with him. When he told me what he had done, it was the creepiest phone conversation I have ever had and I did everything I could just to get off the phone with him because I couldn't process what he just told me. Honestly, the worse part is I don't think he has any remorse over it either.

    Is this a result of PTSD?? What do I do?? I have heard him and other guys and his unit make fun of others with PTSD and those that get help for PTSD. They make the comment that they just need to 'push it in deep, real deep'. So to encourage him to get help, I don't even know where to start. Or should I just run? Run faaaaaar away from this whole situation? I don't want to run because I know he is a good person, but I also don't want to be scared for my safety, his kids safety if he refuses to get help.

    Any help from anyone that has been in a similar situation, would be much appreciated. Thank you!
  5. ...and carry a towel.
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    #5
    Holy cow!

    He needs to get help. And you need to leave. I am all for standing by your loved one, but not when your safety might be in danger! He killed the cat for biting him. He shows no real remorse. That is sociopathic behavior, whatever the underlying psychological cause of it might be. I would really be worried what he would do do if you make him angry.

    Plus, it's just a two month old relationship, not a marriage. So advise him to seek help, and then take care of your own safety. Leave him.
  6. Yes I miss Spell Words and my Grammar Sucks.... Get over it.
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    #6
    Quote Originally Posted by J072811J View Post
    Hi all. I have been seriously dating a military man for 2 months and everything has been amazing.

    Three days ago however, he called me and didn't sound like himself. I assumed he was tired because I knew he was up late the night before with his friends (he drinks quite a bit when he doesn't have his kids). To make a long story short, he killed the family cat that afternoon when he was all alone at his house because she bit him.

    I am so traumatized by it, I don't know what to do. I don't even know how to talk about it with him. When he told me what he had done, it was the creepiest phone conversation I have ever had and I did everything I could just to get off the phone with him because I couldn't process what he just told me. Honestly, the worse part is I don't think he has any remorse over it either.

    Is this a result of PTSD?? What do I do?? I have heard him and other guys and his unit make fun of others with PTSD and those that get help for PTSD. They make the comment that they just need to 'push it in deep, real deep'. So to encourage him to get help, I don't even know where to start. Or should I just run? Run faaaaaar away from this whole situation? I don't want to run because I know he is a good person, but I also don't want to be scared for my safety, his kids safety if he refuses to get help.

    Any help from anyone that has been in a similar situation, would be much appreciated. Thank you!

    QFP

    I Try to be Nicer, when you Try to be Smarter.
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    #7
    Ummm. I would never talk to him again, and I would also make a police report and hope to the gods that he got jail time for that.
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    #8
    You've been dating for 2 months and he kills the cat for biting him? Yeah, I would SPRINT as fast as I could away from. Change your number, cut off all contact, be done with him.
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    #9
    Quote Originally Posted by JasonsGirl View Post
    You've been dating for 2 months and he kills the cat for biting him? Yeah, I would SPRINT as fast as I could away from. Change your number, cut off all contact, be done with him.
    Seriously, and file a report at the police station as well.

    I wouldn't jump to PTSD, humor the thought that he could just be psycho. You barely know him.

    I am so sorry you're in this mess

  10. Yes I miss Spell Words and my Grammar Sucks.... Get over it.
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by JasonsGirl View Post
    You've been dating for 2 months and he kills the cat for biting him? Yeah, I would SPRINT as fast as I could away from. Change your number, cut off all contact, be done with him.

    Quote Originally Posted by Serpentine View Post
    Seriously, and file a report at the police station as well.

    I wouldn't jump to PTSD, humor the thought that he could just be psycho. You barely know him.

    I am so sorry you're in this mess


    Op I fear for your safety

    I Try to be Nicer, when you Try to be Smarter.
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