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Thread: My Update: No more LDR and how that's going

  1. cuz i'm wonderful
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    #1

    My Update: No more LDR and how that's going

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    DB has been home for about a month now. I figured I'd write up a small update on how things are going with us. At first, things were a little touch and go. It really was a big adjustment to have him around for good again. I was unsure about things and for some reason I got really negative about everything. He wasn't being bad, but he wasn't being super good either. It was very confusing. He just...seemed off. But I was off too, so it was just kind of weird for the first two weeks. I wasn't sure what to expect, but I also didn't know what I wanted, so it was just weird and up in the air.

    Lately, though, things have really evened out. I can't tell if it's because I've calmed down, or because he's not doing the things that were upsetting me before. I think it's a mixture of both. I'm getting used to the things he did that were upsetting me (like leaving every morning instead of hanging out for awhile) and I also think he's adjusted his communication style (he had been accidentally hurting my feelings before with some of his harsher word choices) Just to be clear, he wasn't being mean to me. He was just saying things in really blunt terms in ways that felt critical. But lately, I haven't noticed it upsetting me. Either he's toned it down or I've stopped taking it personally, I'm not sure.

    I'm really happy. He's still having a bit of a time adjusting, but I'm just really happy to have him home, happy to have a boyfriend that is so sweet to me, just happy to be doing what were doing. He asks to come over pretty much every night for "Koala Time," his new nickname for cuddling. He's so sweet. I love that man.

    Anyways, that's my life in a nutshell, I guess.
  2. Preaching from the book of Johnny Cash...
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    #2
    glad everything is working out
  3. verabot89
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    yay
    MrsJennyyy is mah wife



  4. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    #4
    glad to see that you guys are doing well!

  5. Senior Member
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    #5
    Glad things are working out better! I'm sure it's a tough adjustment.
  6. Senior Member
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    #6
  7. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by oohrah_baby View Post
    He asks to come over pretty much every night for "Koala Time," his new nickname for cuddling.
    That's cute! Glad you guys are readjusting to life together and everything is going well!
  8. Senior Member
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    #8
    Koala time is adorable. That is all.
  9. Senior Member
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    #9
    I'm glad it's working out!

    When Dh returns from deployment, we often have rocky adjustment periods. He just got back less than a week ago, and over the weekend we were really not connecting. he was running around the house fixing things and cleaning things and moving things, and I felt like he was implying that I hadn't done a good job on the house while he was gone, or that things weren't clean enough or in the best places, or whatever.

    When we finally sat down and said, "we're both really irritated with each other. What's going on?", it turned out that he felt like since he hadn't been around to help with house stuff for so long, he wanted to jump in and do as much as possible to make up for what he wasn't around for. He saw himself as helping, I saw him as judging and fixing mistakes.

    It isn't like that every time he gets back, but I think many couples go through this, so what happened with you guys is totally normal.

    I takes a while to settle back in, but I'm glad you guys have found your balance point and are happy!
  10. Senior Member
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    #10
    Glad to see things are going so well!
    misskrissyo is my partner in crime Fifi is my lover

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