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Thread: is dating really all that its cracked up to be?

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    #1

    is dating really all that its cracked up to be?

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    Well ever other week my mom, my sister, my aunts, my cousins are all ganging up on me about my relationship with DB. They say i shouldnt be so serious so young and i should date, date, date. Is dating all that cracked up? I'm very happy in my serious relationship.

    Makes me think what if i date and find someone i really like or they start really liking me. Am i suppose to break up with that person? I don't understand where they're coming from. I thought the point of dating was to get into a relationship in the end...correct me if i'm wrong.

    Maybe they just don't want me in a long distance relationship with someone in the Navy. if that is the problem they gon hafta get over it.
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    #2
    Only you really know whether you want to keep dating or are ready for a serious relationship.
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    #3
    I met DF when I was 21. He was the ONLY guy I seriously dated. I started talking to him online/on the phone and blew off all other men. I then met DF and we became exclusive after the first date.
    We will be 26 and 29 when we get married.

    I don't feel I have missed out on anything most of the time. DF and I have always had a blast together, sometimes I wonder what dating is like, but it's not a big deal!

    ETA: Serious relationship does not have to mean getting married right away, settling or whatever else your family is worried about! DF and I will have been together 5 years when we get hitched, and well into our 20's.
    You can date, be serious and still live your life and not get hitched. Do whatever feels right for you

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    #4
    Okay so i don't want this to come of as rude or disrespectful but you said once that your mother and your sister had bad relationships and are Man haters.

    So i personally wouldn't go to them for advice or listen to them about relationships, sorry.

    You are old enough to make your own choices. Even if you look back and realize it was a mistake, it is your mistake to make.

    Just ignore them, if you are happy you are happy.
    Grow a back bone and get away from negativity.

    Don't let people bring you down.

    I Try to be Nicer, when you Try to be Smarter.
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    #5
    Quote Originally Posted by ArmyStrong View Post
    Okay so i don't want this to come of as rude or disrespectful but you said once that your mother and your sister had bad relationships and are Man haters.

    So i personally wouldn't go to them for advice or listen to them about relationships, sorry.

    You are old enough to make your own choices. Even if you look back and realize it was a mistake, it is your mistake to make.

    Just ignore them, if you are happy you are happy.
    Grow a back bone and get away from negativity.

    Don't let people bring you down.
    its so hard to get away. I just have to deal with all this all the time. I have no sanctuary. No matter how my family is, they are still my family and their opinions still penetrate through my defenses. Sometimes the advice is good. And it seems they're looking out for me. And sometimes its whack ass advice.

    Its just...i dont know what to do anymore. I've tried everything to tune them out. Any advice on that?

    oh yeah its not disrespectful. LOL i'm always told how it is. and Ill tell it how it is too.
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    #6
    You are young. BUT. Plenty of people have gotten married at your age, including my mother and myself, however, you need to be smart, follow your heart and keep a clear mind and think straight. As I age and as I experience life and situations which I was more and more passionate about; I've gained my voice and have been able to fully express my opinions to my family. Sometimes it takes time.

    Dating is frustrating. Theres a lot, a lot, a lot of guys out there that are NOT FOR YOU...clearly, there should be more in that boat....but theres supposed to be only one that you settle down with... if you found him already, count your blessings. And tell those that don't understand to live their own lives, but also keep in mind that when someone speaks up, its usually because they care...so be tactful.
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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Annie View Post
    You are young. BUT. Plenty of people have gotten married at your age, including my mother and myself, however, you need to be smart, follow your heart and keep a clear mind and think straight. As I age and as I experience life and situations which I was more and more passionate about; I've gained my voice and have been able to fully express my opinions to my family. Sometimes it takes time.

    Dating is frustrating. Theres a lot, a lot, a lot of guys out there that are NOT FOR YOU...clearly, there should be more in that boat....but theres supposed to be only one that you settle down with... if you found him already, count your blessings. And tell those that don't understand to live their own lives, but also keep in mind that when someone speaks up, its usually because they care...so be tactful.
    care too much in my opinion. SMH what am i gonna do with this family LOL!!
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    #8
    I was just having a similar conversation with my friend (who dates LOTS of guys...and at the same time...) the other day. I was saying how, actually, I HATED dating and trying to go out and find quality men at our age is next to impossible. She is content with the guys she meets at clubs or through friends at parties because that's where she is at her life right now...enjoying going out and partying. I've never been that girl...I enjoy stability and serious committments. I want someone I have a real friendship with, trust, respect, and love. I am so lucky that I found that in my DB, so why would I ever give it up? As much as a lot of my friends love 'playing the field', they are also the ones who call me crying in the middle of the night because they are lonely or have been hurt by yet another loser. No thanks! I'll take my DB who I love with all my heart and who has completely changed my life for the better over 'the fun of dating' anyday!
    Only you know whats right for YOU. If you feel that you have a good thing going with your guy, stick with it!
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    #9
    I got married when I was 21.
    I was in one previous relationship and two other flings.

    That was enough dating for me.
    I also couldn't give up the man who could deal with me. Hehe.


    I think it's a good idea to date if you haven't really, but if you don't want to...you are a grown person.
  10. Don't ever settle for less than you deserve.
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    #10
    I have only have serious relationships I've never found an interest in the hump and dump stuff as I call it. (IMO dating if you're not serious that is what it is)

    I'm 21 going on 22 married to the love of my life for over a year now, and I do not for a second regret not going out a dating a bunch of people. Only YOU can decide what works for you. You said it best i the last line of your OP, and if you are happy with your DB and he makes you feel everything you deserve to feel. Happy, content, special, loved, and so on then I say you have yourself one of the rare men left out there, and I say hold onto him and never let go. (Of course unless he ever turns into a douche then well yea..)
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