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Thread: I think

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    #1

    I think

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    I might need to have another talk with my FWB. I am confused .... again.

    We are more like boyfriend-girlfriend right now, than anything. In fact we spend more time together than any couple I know. Its like we are in a relationship, but no one is allowed to know. It has gone WAY past FWB IMO.

    For example: On Monday he said that I couldn't stay over until Thursday, which was totally fine with me. Then last night, what does he do? txt me wanting to know if I want to come over, of course I do. Tonight? He asks if i want to come over!

    I have spent almost every single night with him since I came back from winter break. That is a lot of time together.

    I know he would never want this to be a real "relationship" but this is straight up ridiculous. I can't tell if he has any feelings for me, but it sure seems like it.

    R.I.P. My Love, Everyone was supposed to come home together, I'm sorry you had to come home early
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    #2
    a talk definitely sounds like it'll help
  3. cuz i'm wonderful
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    #3
    DB (sort of DB, if you happened to read my annoucement thread) have done this dance before. You know how words and actions need to line up for everything to make sense? Yeah. FWB, when that doesn't happen, it's confusing. You don't have feelings for me, but you act like you have feelings for me....what?!

    Not to say you and your FWB are further along that you should be, or at the kind of crazy weird place DB and I are at after six years. I just mean to offer condolences for how annoying it is when things are confusing.

    PM me if you need anything, love.
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    #4
    Are you guys "dating" though? Having sex doesn't automatically = relationship. Is he taking you out in public and paying for you? Did he do anything for you for Valentines Day? Just because you spend time together doesn't really mean anything. He may like your personality and friendship, combined with the fact that you want to have sex with him.

    I did this with a guy friend for several months. It was fun but it was obvious it was never going to go anywhere...so I eventually cut it off.
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    #5
    When I was 17 I had the same situation. If you have feelings for him but you know he's not going to date you this is a disaster waiting to happen. Fwb rarely ever end well
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    Quote Originally Posted by Glamorous View Post
    Are you guys "dating" though? Having sex doesn't automatically = relationship. Is he taking you out in public and paying for you? Did he do anything for you for Valentines Day? Just because you spend time together doesn't really mean anything. He may like your personality and friendship, combined with the fact that you want to have sex with him.

    I did this with a guy friend for several months. It was fun but it was obvious it was never going to go anywhere...so I eventually cut it off.
    Oh there is no formal "dating". Of course we do a lot of stuff in public together, but its usually with other people. You can bet that if everyone is doing something together, I will show up with him. He's pretty cheap, a "you scratch my back I'll scratch your's" kind of guy, so even if we were dating he wouldn't be paying for me.

    I guess its probably not going anywhere, but I don't want to end it either. KWIM? I asked him last night if I stopped having sex with him if he would still want me over, and he said yes, but he would probably become a chronic masturbator for a while.
    R.I.P. My Love, Everyone was supposed to come home together, I'm sorry you had to come home early
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    #7
    just a thought, i think that if you guys so want to become more serious maybe you should cut off on sex for a while and focus on dating. well thats if he agrees to of course
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    #8
    Maybe on friday you should like "I am bored, lets go to a movie RIGHT NOW." Then there is no time to invite anyone else, and you will be out in public together. See how that goes. Maybe it will happen again. And again. Just don't invite him to meet your mom.
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    #9
    Quote Originally Posted by Katarianna View Post
    Maybe on friday you should like "I am bored, lets go to a movie RIGHT NOW." Then there is no time to invite anyone else, and you will be out in public together. See how that goes. Maybe it will happen again. And again. Just don't invite him to meet your mom.
    We've gone to like one or two movies alone, he just doesn't like going out with just one person, its kind of weird... I don't think its because its alone with me either.

    I was gonna invite him to dinner on friday night at my house! bad idea?!
    R.I.P. My Love, Everyone was supposed to come home together, I'm sorry you had to come home early
  10. was ncgirl
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by azarmygf View Post
    Oh there is no formal "dating". Of course we do a lot of stuff in public together, but its usually with other people. You can bet that if everyone is doing something together, I will show up with him. He's pretty cheap, a "you scratch my back I'll scratch your's" kind of guy, so even if we were dating he wouldn't be paying for me.

    I guess its probably not going anywhere, but I don't want to end it either. KWIM? I asked him last night if I stopped having sex with him if he would still want me over, and he said yes, but he would probably become a chronic masturbator for a while.
    Is he affectionate with you when you're out with other friends?

    I think this is taking a tole on you. From the posts I've seen you're not really ok with the situation. I think he's the one setting all of the rules and you're playing by them. And it sounds like its hurting you and making you question your "worth" in his eyes (ie, does he just want me to have sex, does he care for me in other ways). Thats not a good feeling.

    Think about what YOU want. And ask for it. If he isnt willing to compromise or doesnt want the same thing, you have your answer. You need to take out all of the other stuff, cause really this is what it comes down to.


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