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Thread: To wait, or not to wait?

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    #1

    To wait, or not to wait?

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    DB and I have been dating for 6 months and agreed to wait to have sex till we got married. We both have had other partners before meeting each other but this time we want it to be special and whats more special than waiting till marriage? Don't get me wrong, we have no problem in satisfying each other in alternative ways we just don't go all the way.
    Now that he's been deployed for a few months we have brought up the topic a couple of times of whether we should keep it super special and wait or if we should just give in when he gets back home from deployment and enjoy each other as much as possible!
    We are wanting to get married between a year or two from his homecoming. I know it's old school to wait nowadays but did anyone here wait till marriage and do you think the 'specialness' outweighs the torture of holding off when caught in the moment.
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    #2
    I think that's very romantic to wait for marriage but it could also be very special before too. Just do whatever you feel is right. If you decide not to wait for marriage, make it an unforgetable moment. I know it would be already but make it more so... if that makes any sense
    As much as I think waiting until marriage is great because it's not as common as it used to be, the day an SO gets back from a deployment can be just as great. You haven't seen eachother in a long time & it's a way to express your love to eachother and be intimate to the highest degree

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    #3
    Every "first time" is going to be different for every person.

    First off I have to say, if you've always wanted to wait till your wedding night, then wait. You won't regret it. And as for not having sex on your wedding night, it IS possible, I for one did it! I was too excited to "get to know" DH in that way on our wedding night NOT to have sex. Don't let yourself tell yourself that you should just do it when you are so close.

    If its NOT that big of a deal to you anymore, then just take it slow. Don't expect way to much. Your first time 99% of the time won't be like in the movies. It can be awkward sometimes but just let it go, don't let one "wrong" thing ruin the mood for you. It will hurt, not like a OMGosh!!! I'M DYING pain but it will be uncomfortable as your hymen tears. The soreness for me the next day wasn't that bad once I got up and moving and there were no problems as we drove and arrived at our honeymoon.

    If you want, you can PM, I'd rather not broadcast my sex life on the board Just remember, this is a very deep emotional thing when you share it with the man you are planning to spend the rest of your life with. Its ok. Just relax yourself and let yourself just feel what happens.

    Oh and don't expect it to last too long. He may try to "practice" as much as possible with ahem, solo runs, if you will but its a different feeling when there's two and that can have an awesome effect.

    I always tell people who ask to wait if thats what their original plan was because that was your original plan until Prince Charming came into the picture. I think it is 100% worth it and 100% do-able.

    And also there is another thread very similar to yours in case your interested in another set of answers-http://www.militarysos.com/forum/pillow-talk/436765-advice-first-time.html
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    #4
    There's nothing wrong with waiting. It's all about what you feel comfortable with.
    IMO, if you know you love someone and you know you mean something to each other, than sex can be VERY special. Some people see marriage as keeping a virtue, not just about it being with someone "special" KWIM?
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    #5
    Quote Originally Posted by SeabeeCDB View Post
    I think that's very romantic to wait for marriage but it could also be very special before too. Just do whatever you feel is right. If you decide not to wait for marriage, make it an unforgetable moment. I know it would be already but make it more so... if that makes any sense
    As much as I think waiting until marriage is great because it's not as common as it used to be, the day an SO gets back from a deployment can be just as great. You haven't seen eachother in a long time & it's a way to express your love to eachother and be intimate to the highest degree
    This.

    I agree you should do what you feel is right for you and your relationship, but like PP said either way can and will be special, and also seeing your SO after a deployment can cause feelings that can be pretty hard to suppress
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    #6
    I was all for waiting until marriage but one day I was like....no I want more

    I think it's about what you two feel, I don;t think anyone else can answer this for you.
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    #7
    I waited the first time I got married. I didn't wait the second time I got married and I don't think there was any difference. They were both special. Waiting was a little more akward, but still special. It is completely up to you!


  8. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    #8
    Moved to love shack.
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    #9
    Quote Originally Posted by LouWho View Post
    Moved to love shack.
    I don't think OP can see it, she only has 42 posts
  10. Lex Justo BAMF Patriot Guard Rider!
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by dancerdixy View Post
    I don't think OP can see it, she only has 42 posts
    Pillow talk is protected, not love shack
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