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Thread: Is this normal?

  1. Getting Married April, 15, 2012!!
    Lovebug415's Avatar
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    #1

    Is this normal?

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    So...even before DB and I found out he was deploying we were outside talking and star gazing when he grabs my hand and says "We should get married" I was so excited and asked when. All that was said was "soon"

    A few months go by and the subject wasn't brought up, so while bored at work I texted him asking what his thoughts were and he says, "We haven't been together long enough" It escalated into an argument when he said, "you'll never have to bring it up again I promise" meaning, it'll happen soon i promise!

    Well, last week we found out DB deploys in January and we had decided to get atleast engaged before he leaves. He let me pick out a ring so I took my roomate to go with me to look. I found THE ring and have wanted to show him for 5 days now. Everytime i ask him if I can take him to go look at it he says yeah later today...well it's been 5 days and nothing...idk what to do. I've asked him if it's what he really wants to do and he assures me it is....I'm not sure if he's insecure because of his past with his ex cheating on him during basic or his parents splitting up while he was young...advice? i'm frustrated. I don't want to push him into anything he doesn't want to do. But I'm tired of getting my hopes up and getting excited....
  2. Senior Member
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    #2
    he might just not be ready yet
    just wait it out. it'll be just as amazing whenever it happens
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    #3
    whatever happened of the element of surprise? Let him dazzle you girl. I wouldn't bring it up again. He's deploying soon, so he could be freaking out about everything. Breathe.
  4. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    #4
    if he is getting cold feet, is having him deploy without receiving a ring so bad? You need to be ready for both instances because if he isn't ready, you may not get a ring before he deploys.

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    #5
    Quote Originally Posted by BILYs_special View Post
    if he is getting cold feet, is having him deploy without receiving a ring so bad? You need to be ready for both instances because if he isn't ready, you may not get a ring before he deploys.
    Double Ring Proposal 10/5/2011 made Augusta my MSOS wifey
    skp is my rockin' Cali pal
    No more ticker!!! Deployment #2 is over
  6. MilitarySOS Jewel
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    #6
    I agree with some of the posts....just because its you that he wants doesnt mean that hes ready to get married..its a huge step...I would just be happy that he told you that your the one he wants to marry, take that for what its worth.
  7. Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?
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    #7
    I agree with waiting if he has cold feet, if you keep pushing he is just going to be resentful. Engagement and marriage are serious steps that BOTH people have to want. He knows how you feel now the ball is in his court.
  8. Account Closed
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    #8
    Yeaaaa No offense but I don't think he's ready. I think he might just be saying yes because he might want to eventually, but you'l be upset if he says no now.

    I'm sorry. I kinda understand what you're feeling. DB and I have talked about this before and just when I thought we were on the same page about it...even just moving in together after graduation...he starts giving mixed signals about it. Like with marriage it was "maybe after a year or so just to be sure..." then it went to two years...now i'm pretty sure it's just when he thinks hes ready. :rollseyes which in a way i'm a lot happier about because i don't want him feeling obligated to me.

    But anyway.. I think you should let him do it on his own clock. I know he's deploying soon, but that's a good reason to wait. He probably has a lot of stress on him right now, and this is something you two should be enjoying, not stressing over.
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    #9
    Don't rush it.. you haven't been together that long. No one's timing you. I'm sure he wants to do it when it feels right, so just don't pressure him. Patience is a virtue
    Camster is the best wifey ever

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