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Thread: I'm not sure how I should react..

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    #1

    Confused I'm not sure how I should react..

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    I don't know if there has ever been anything posted on this before but I got onto my computer this morning and found a TON of porn was watched last night, after I went to bed.... How do you ladies feel about your hubby watching porn? I'm honestly a little bothered by it but am not really sure how I'm SUPPOSED to react... :-/
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    #2
    Quote Originally Posted by retroarmywife View Post
    I don't know if there has ever been anything posted on this before but I got onto my computer this morning and found a TON of porn was watched last night, after I went to bed.... How do you ladies feel about your hubby watching porn? I'm honestly a little bothered by it but am not really sure how I'm SUPPOSED to react... :-/
    Have you guys ever talked about it? If there was no previous understanding then no, you should not be upset, but you should talk about it with him if it bothers you.

    Mods, can we get an "SO watching porn" forum?



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    #3
    I guess everyone is different.

    It doesn't bother me if the mister watches porn. As long as it's legal stuff, no worries for me. I like a lil sumthin sumthin myself.
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    I guess it bothers me because we're in a bit of a dry spell right now, he just doesn't ever seem to be in the mood with me but he can sit and watch porn, I just don't know how to bring it up. We've talked about it, and talked about how he "doesn't watch porn" but clearly that's bullsh*t.... but who knows maybe it's just my pregnancy hormones being crazy.
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    DH doesnt watch porn but we have talked about it and he knows that it wouldn't bother me if he did. i myself like to watch it sometimes... not to get off or anything its just fun to watch sometimes. ya never know ya could learn a new move or two.
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    #6
    Talk to your SO about it, calmly and without accusation. There is no way you're "supposed" to react- if you are uncomfortable, then you are, and you shouldn't have to squelch that feeling. At the same time, if you don't already have boundaries in place regarding pornography, then you should definitely not approach him as though he has done something wrong. Just talk to him, see what you two can figure out between you.

    (And since you asked, pornography is outside the boundaries of our marriage, for either one of us, for any reason, at any time. But you should set boundaries based on both your feelings on the subject, not based on anyone else's. Good luck!)
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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by retroarmywife View Post
    I guess it bothers me because we're in a bit of a dry spell right now, he just doesn't ever seem to be in the mood with me but he can sit and watch porn, I just don't know how to bring it up. We've talked about it, and talked about how he "doesn't watch porn" but clearly that's bullsh*t.... but who knows maybe it's just my pregnancy hormones being crazy.
    Okay well that's different. Yeah I would be a little ticked. Some men get a little weird when we're pregnant. Talk to him again, let him know how it makes you feel. I guess that's all you can do.
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    I'm not bothered by porn. Maybe if the porn was some weird freaky or illegal stuff, then yes I would be bothered. Men are more visual then women. People masturbate to release stress as well as for sexual pleasure. Sometimes my husband and I even watch porn together. I wouldn't really take it as an insult to your sex life with him. Its normal to masturbate and healthy. I do it and I don't mind my husband doing it. As long as its not interferring with our sex life together then its fine. It turns my husband on to know I do it and same for me. I even watch too. You just need to sit down with him and talk about it if it really bothers you.
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    #9
    Quote Originally Posted by retroarmywife View Post
    I guess it bothers me because we're in a bit of a dry spell right now, he just doesn't ever seem to be in the mood with me but he can sit and watch porn, I just don't know how to bring it up. We've talked about it, and talked about how he "doesn't watch porn" but clearly that's bullsh*t.... but who knows maybe it's just my pregnancy hormones being crazy.
    yea you forgot that part.. i would be upset too. i guess just talk to him. ask him straight up and be honest tell him you saw that he was watching it last night. dont go into the coversation mad or get in his face just calmly talk to him about it. he's your husband you should be able to talk to him about stuff like this.
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by retroarmywife View Post
    I guess it bothers me because we're in a bit of a dry spell right now, he just doesn't ever seem to be in the mood with me but he can sit and watch porn, I just don't know how to bring it up. We've talked about it, and talked about how he "doesn't watch porn" but clearly that's bullsh*t.... but who knows maybe it's just my pregnancy hormones being crazy.
    That would definitely upset me. He isn't interested in being intimate with you, and stays up while you're sleeping to wank in the other room? Absolutely not okay in my opinion.

    I would say "I noticed that you were watching porn last night while I was asleep. You haven't expressed interest in being intimate with me lately, and I thought it was because you just haven't had the desire. The porn leads me to believe otherwise. It is upsetting to me that we aren't intimate, but that you are getting physical release in other ways. Can we talk about a way to remedy this so that we both are getting what we need?" Or however you want to approach it.
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