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Thread: cheating?

  1. sp2008
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    cheating?

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    So basically I'm half way through a deployment and I've recently learned that my SO, whom I'm engaged to, has been having secret conversations with other girls behind my back. Right before he left for pre-deployment training he received inappropriate photographs emailed to him from a girl back home. This was around Thanksgiving.

    Recently i found a conversation between him and an ex in his gchat discussing him wanting to have sex with her. This conversation prompted me to go snooping, hence I found the email address filled with pictures. Keep in mind these are two different girls.

    Come to find out after some more investigating, that when he was home over Thanksgiving he called the gchat girl twice.

    I'm pretty much a wreck, don't know what to think, and have no idea what to do. Do I break off the engagement, wait till he gets home, etc? I've already confronted him with everything except the phone records, which I just found out about today. He's explained everything else as pranks going on with the other guys b/c they are bored. And the pictures - which happened before the deployment, as trying to help out a military friend who was going through a divorce.

    We've been together for 5 years and when we first started dated he slept with an ex girlfriend, but until now there hasn't been anything else too suspicious. I'm at a complete loss on what to do.

    Please help!!
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    #2
    follow your heart, that is the best advice I can give you.
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    #3
    Have you tried confronting him yet?
    An unconditional right to say what one pleases about public affairs is what I consider to be the minimum guarantee of the First Amendment.
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    #4
    I figured out recently to trust your instincts. If something doesn't feel right then it probably isn't.
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    #5
    He has issues. Get counseling or break up. You deserve better.
  6. Formerly known as stapletonlove
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    #6
    Whoa


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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by sp2008 View Post
    He's explained everything else as pranks going on with the other guys b/c they are bored. And the pictures - which happened before the deployment, as trying to help out a military friend who was going through a divorce.


    Yea, i dated a guy once who tried to get into one of my good friends pants. She and I were at that moment in a HUGE fight and from the looks of it, were never going to be friends again. We had been fighting for weeks. I owed her like $150 and at the moment couldn't afford to pay her back so we got into a huge argument.

    ex-DB emailed her on myspace and offered to pay her so that i would be free of that debt. she kept it very short and impersonal. he kept going into detail and told her how beautiful she was, if he could stop by her work to drop off the money and then maybe go out to coffee with her.. then proceeded to tell her how she deserved a man that would do everything to her she ever wanted.

    she declined and kept telling him that even though she and i were fighting, i was a good girl and didn't deserve to be treated like that. i only found out through my best friend who read these emails.

    confronting him he said: i wanted to see what kind of person she was

    me: why didn't you tell me?

    him: i forgot

    me: you forgot to tell me that you propostioned my friend and wanted into her pants?

    him: yes, so sue me, i'm not as smart as you and i forgot.

    me: goodbye, dont ever call me again. *click*



    in your heart of hearts you know he's lying. ditch him like a bad habit, especially because he can't man up to his own actions.

    ~*~ Every long lost dream led me to where you are. Others who broke my heart they were like Northern stars *~*

    ~*~Pointing me on my way into your loving arms. This much I know is true that God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you~*~
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    #8
    I'd confront him. Then try counseling together when he comes back and start individual therapy for you until he does.
  9. bailliesbags
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    Sounds like he is trying to get out of what he knows he has done wrong. I don't beleive he was doing it for other guys. Other guys are big boys and can take care of their own needs!!
  10. 웃♥유
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    #10
    if i were you i'd let him kno how you feel now even if he is deployed! id hate to hear you waited till he got home just to be dissappointed!! find out now before its too late! =[
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