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Thread: Girls nights

  1. Lifes hard... get a helmet.
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    #1

    Girls nights

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    Ok I don't even know if this is the right forum but here we go...

    Please don't be afraid to hurt my feelings, but I need to see what other people say about this.

    I know some of us have girls nights out. But my question is, is it wrong if you run into some of your guy friends to hang out with them ( ie you and all your girl friends hanging with some of your good guy friends..) Yeah I know its girls night and what not, but you can't help who you run in to. Anyway the reason I'm asking is because Tim is getting really pissy lately whenever I mention having a girls night.. referring to it as " bail on your boyfriend and hang out with guys night.." And thats not the intention of it at all. My friends and I all pretty much hang at the same places. so yeah we run into people. And its not like I'm hitting on/ being hit on by my guy friends just because they're there ( but obviously Tim thinks otherwise...) And I told him sometimes I just need a night without him ( especially since we're having problems) but that only makes it worse and he then says I'm looking for my rebound so I can dump him I dunno do you think its wrong that I hang with my good guy friends when he's not around, even if its "techniqually" a girls night... I mean I always tell him to have fun and go out with the guys but he is such a homebody and won't. But when I go out he wants to be stuck up my butt...

    ETA- I've also offered for him to meet up with us later in the night ( So I can have some friend time first), but that isn't good enough for him either
    Last edited by dotb182; 03-27-2008 at 07:15 AM.
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  2. No one loves their mother like her boys!
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    #2
    honestly I would be telling this guys friend no it's disresepectful and wrong to be decieving about having a girls night when your meeting up with this guy..but this is just my opnoion.
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    #3
    I do not see it as lying or disrespectful, IMO because you are not planning on meeting up with them you just see them at the same places where you go out. I would make it a point that when I see them say hello in passing and be on my merry way.
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    #4
    I don't know, that is a hard one. I guess, the way I have to come to my decision is this, would I be upset if DH went out to have a boys' night and ended up hanging out with girls? My answer is, yes, I'd be upset. It may be different in our situations, because I'd be upset that I was stuck at home while he was hanging out with more than just the guys, but yeah, I'd be bothered by it.
    I wonder if Tim's really upset about the guys, or if he is just picking something to be upset about because you are having some underlying issues? Not sure...


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    #5
    NO WAY!

    I think that is perfectly fine...I go out all the time with my girls and we run into my guy friends...my boyfriend doesn't care...he knows they are just be friends...I talk about them a lot too so he really understands that they are like girls to me haha...

    and i think its important for girlfriends to have guy friends and boyfriends to have girl friends...so no way at all
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    #6
    I think its fine if you guys have that understanding about hanging out. I personally would have a problem with my husband going out for a supposed guys night out and end up hanging with girls, and he would have a problem if I did the same thing. It may be different for me because I am married but in any relationship there must be trust and mutaul respect, but some situations could and should be avoided. If talking to your friends at the places you hang out is causing a problem then maybe you should go out with your boyfriend to the same places and let him see for himself that nothing is going on. Just a thought.
  7. and still I think of you
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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by TallBlondie82 View Post
    NO WAY!

    I think that is perfectly fine...I go out all the time with my girls and we run into my guy friends...my boyfriend doesn't care...he knows they are just be friends...I talk about them a lot too so he really understands that they are like girls to me haha...

    and i think its important for girlfriends to have guy friends and boyfriends to have girl friends...so no way at all
    I completely agree. I know that Dh would not have a problem with it and i would not have a problem if the situation was reveresed.
  8. Lifes hard... get a helmet.
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    #8
    Quote Originally Posted by LaneyBug View Post
    I don't know, that is a hard one. I guess, the way I have to come to my decision is this, would I be upset if DH went out to have a boys' night and ended up hanging out with girls? My answer is, yes, I'd be upset. It may be different in our situations, because I'd be upset that I was stuck at home while he was hanging out with more than just the guys, but yeah, I'd be bothered by it.
    I wonder if Tim's really upset about the guys, or if he is just picking something to be upset about because you are having some underlying issues? Not sure...
    I have thought about that too, and wonder if he is just trying to pick a fight.. I don't think it would bother me if him and his friends hung out with girls if...1. I know the girls and 2. He didn't hide it or lie about it. Which is what bothers me because he knows my guy friends and I always tell him but he still gets really upset.
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    #9
    Quote Originally Posted by dotb182 View Post
    I have thought about that too, and wonder if he is just trying to pick a fight.. I don't think it would bother me if him and his friends hung out with girls if...1. I know the girls and 2. He didn't hide it or lie about it. Which is what bothers me because he knows my guy friends and I always tell him but he still gets really upset.
    Yeah, I totally hear where you are coming from, and I probably wouldn't be untrusting because DH would be totally honest, but just because I didn't get to hang out. That's all.


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    #10
    Maybe he's insecure does it happen EVERYTIME you go out? One of our rules for girls night out was not matter who we ran into when we went out it was a GIRLS night out so it was just us no matter what .But I'm assuming when he thinks your going for girls night out that its just going to be girls and he probably thinks its a little weird when guys intertwine
    "I believe that everything happens for a reason.People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so that eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together"-Marilyn Monroe
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