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Thread: Feeling every single mile between us

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    #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by LifeHappens View Post
    Do you at least get to talk to him or video chat on occassion? When my DH is deployed, and it has always been places where I can't go meet him (and there are no visits during those long months) we are able to email and internet video chat/call (when it works). I know those types of communication don't equal being able to wrap your arms around someone but any form of communication beats none.
    I know when he is flying he can't exactly call, but can you two talk after he is off work?
    It really depends. I know he does his best to try and call, but his past two deployments had him flying pretty much around the clock and he's not allowed to contact me when he's on crew rest. During that time, I probably heard from him 3 or 4 times throughout the entire deployment. I couldn't even send him care packages either because the base he was at didn't assign addresses for whatever reason. I totally agree, I totally look forward to those few calls, even if they're only 5 minutes long. For the most part, I just send him messages and emails for him to read but don't really get (or expect) any responses.
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    #12
    Quote Originally Posted by serendipitease View Post
    It really depends. I know he does his best to try and call, but his past two deployments had him flying pretty much around the clock and he's not allowed to contact me when he's on crew rest. During that time, I probably heard from him 3 or 4 times throughout the entire deployment. I couldn't even send him care packages either because the base he was at didn't assign addresses for whatever reason. I totally agree, I totally look forward to those few calls, even if they're only 5 minutes long. For the most part, I just send him messages and emails for him to read but don't really get (or expect) any responses.
    Wow... I really hope he is back soon and that he gets to hang around long enough for a nice visit!
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    #13
    Quote Originally Posted by serendipitease View Post
    It really depends. I know he does his best to try and call, but his past two deployments had him flying pretty much around the clock and he's not allowed to contact me when he's on crew rest. During that time, I probably heard from him 3 or 4 times throughout the entire deployment. I couldn't even send him care packages either because the base he was at didn't assign addresses for whatever reason. I totally agree, I totally look forward to those few calls, even if they're only 5 minutes long. For the most part, I just send him messages and emails for him to read but don't really get (or expect) any responses.
    That's not how crew rest works, so maybe something got lost in translation when you guys discussed it? (Navy at least, admitedly not air force.)
    Science always wins over bullshit. ~Dick Rutkowski
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    Quote Originally Posted by villanelle View Post
    That's not how crew rest works, so maybe something got lost in translation when you guys discussed it? (Navy at least, admitedly not air force.)
    Oh, I'm not really sure. He just told me that he's supposed to have a certain amount of uninterrupted "rest" time where he's supposed to sleep to prepare for important/long flights and has gotten in trouble before for texting during it. I don't really ask when it comes to things like that - I just go along with what he says and does, haha.
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    #15

    I feel you..

    Hi. You know, you still lucky you got to see him after few months and can spend time with him after he deployed. I am with my bf since January 2017 and we're in a long freaking distance. 2000 miles away cause I am living here in the Philippines and he's assigned in San Diego so we only got to see each other when he visit me here in my country. I know exactly how you feel cause I've been always in the situation but what I do is, I focus more on my work. I hangout with friends once every week. Spend more time with family. I went to workout too whenever I feel down. Always pray and ask God his guidance. Keep yourself busy and don't let the loneliness throw all those sacrifices you made with your significant other. Remember, they need our love and support. So we have to be there for them and everything will be worth it in the end so stay strong. I hope it helps.
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    #16
    Quote Originally Posted by serendipitease View Post
    DB and I have been together for over a year now, and we've been through three deployments together. We're long distance too - with about 700 odd miles between us. I go to school in Nashville, he's stationed in Florida. We've seen each other maybe about 7 times, ranging between 4-11 days at a time, so I'm no stranger to airports or countdowns and all the fun stuff that comes with LDRs. It's a lifestyle for me now.

    But for some reason, I've been seriously down in the dumps about the distance. Normally, when I leave him, I might cry in the airport or on the plane, but life moves on and I just wait until I can see him again. But for whatever reason, when I was coming back from my trip to see him during MLK weekend, I spent the entire next day just crying and laying in bed. I had never felt every single mile between us as much as I did that day. He's about to leave for his fourth deployment, so maybe it's knowing it'll be a minute before I see him again that's really getting to me, or maybe I randomly developed separation anxiety, or maybe we've reached different milestones in our relationship that I've just gotten more attached. Who knows? All I know is that distance really really really sucks. This isn't my first long distance relationship nor is this relationship new, but for whatever reason, I'm just not coping as well with it as I have in the past.

    So my question to everyone is this: how do you all cope with the distance? Where do you find comfort? My friends, as darling as they are and as hard as they try, just don't get it. And there's really nothing worse than trying to explain how you feel and getting looks of pity.
    Very good question? The majority of the time I reflect on how we became involved with one another and usually, I get this overwhelming natural high. DG favorite food is Reese and Snickers bars being that we share a great bond with each other our satisfaction apart is our desire by our hunger for each other. DG is a fitness trainer and always keeps the healthy lifestyle ideology on my mind when I'm deployed for months and weeks at a time. Our secret is strong affirmation and knowing there is no person like myself as her husband.
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    #17
    I've been in a long distance relationship for over four years and neither I nor my boyfriend have cheated or even wanted to cheat.

    Do we miss each other? Of course. Do we miss sex? Obviously. Would we rather sleep with each other every night than lie alone in bed only dreaming about the other person? Duh!!!

    The whole reason that we're in a long distance relationship is that we only love each other and only want each other. It's worth waiting - sometimes months at a time - to hold each other again because when we do, it's better than we ever thought possible.

    If people aren't committed to their partner, or feel deprived of sex then they shouldn't enter into an LDR - it's simply too much heartache to bother with.

    In my opinion, the only reason someone should go long distance is if they are sure that all the pain of missing each other and the emotional exhaustion of constant hellos and goodbyes is really better than being without the person altogether.
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