New Marine Girlfriend in need of advice and support!

[Lindsayturcotte]

Hi guys!

I am a new marine girlfriend! we had been talking for multiple months prior to him making me his official girlfriend, and leaves soon to be stationed across the country from me. Only a few months after he gets to his new place he gets deployed on a ship to Japan, and i know other places in that area. I really don't know a ton about the military girlfriend life, so any advice or input would be greatly appreciated! I have so many concerns about him being away from me for that long. He has a year and a half left in the marines and then he is done. I will get to go visit before he gets deployed in June which is great to look forward to. I am worried he will lose interest in me or even find someone else. I am so happy I found this site because I am trying to come up with many many ways to make this the best experience for him as well as for me. I thought of FaceTime as much as he possibly can, I want to send care packages including cute letters and items that will make him happy! Any advice and support would be great! I trust him tons but am still very nervous, he is the love of my life!

[idratherbehiking]

Hi from a Marine girlfriend turned wife

[Medic2Doula]

Hi!
My husband was in Japan for 3 years while we were dating and I was stuck stateside.
I sent him a TON of packages with snacks and cookies. I sent him cake in a jar once and was swiftly corrected, don't send glass stuff. oops

My advice about visiting, make sure you have a little understanding of the area he is in (so you know what shrines you can visit, places you might want to eat), and learn a little about the culture. Also, get some money exchanged before you get there!!
I went to Japan twice, once just to visit him, and another to visit my sister when he was restricted to the ship.
Mistakes I made include (but are not limited to)
- I didn't get money exchanged. I had to rely on dh to buy me food, because where he was (I think bigger cities *might* be different) they did not accept my American bank card. Maybe this is common sense. I ended up being too embarrassed to ask him for food or money, so I ended up only eating twice the whole time I was there (a week!!!) until we got to the airport. He worked every day and assumed I ate without him.
- I didn't venture outside of the hotel much because I was afraid of getting lost, had no access to my money, and dh was at work. I REALLY wish I would have gone out and explored. There is a peace park near Sasebo that I wish I would have seen. There will be plenty of time to be holed up together, but you only get to explore Japan together x number of times. I would get him to go with you.
- I didn't look into the food at all. Now I wish I would have tried curry buns or street food. All these things that now I can only look at pictures of and drool.

My husband was out of Sasebo, I think his ship has been dry docked, but if you need anything I'm here to talk

[Lindsayturcotte]

Thank you so much! Seeing that there are success stories really makes me feel better! Im sure i will be reaching out for more support. This is all just so new to me, so many uncertainties. I hope to continue our love story and keep that bond strong!

[valleygirl17]

Welcome! My boyfriend currently in Japan and I only see him twice a year. We take turn to visit each other, i visit him in Okinawa and he visits me in Australia or other countries, depending on our schedules. Long distance sucks sometimes but we try our best to work things out. Next summer his mum will visit him in Japan and finally i'm going to see her in person. Don't stress too much, focus on creating good memories when you see him before he deploys.

- I didn't get money exchanged. I had to rely on dh to buy me food, because where he was (I think bigger cities *might* be different) they did not accept my American bank card. Maybe this is common sense. I ended up being too embarrassed to ask him for food or money, so I ended up only eating twice the whole time I was there (a week!!!) until we got to the airport. He worked every day and assumed I ate without him.

This is one of my biggest fear when traveling overseas. I forgot to tell my bank that i was traveling overseas and they blocked my card. Lesson learned, i always make sure i exchange some cash before i go to the airport. Do you have any plan to visit Japan again?

[fleurdelis]

Hi from another fellow Marine girlfriend!

[Lindsayturcotte]

Luckily he is stationed in Hawaii until June which is then when he will be on his ship. I will get to see him once before he gets deployed and then after, so it is about twice a year. That seems like FOREVER! Him leaving is just about a day old for me now, so I am still dealing with the initial overthinking and what not. I just have to believe he will stay loyal! I cannot wait to visit hawaii though like how awesome! How does everyone manage to keep conversations exciting, and keep the relationship engaging?? Thanks!

[Lindsayturcotte]

Hi! This is so great meeting other people in my situation because i felt so alone and confused, nobody i my family or even friends understand!

[fleurdelis]

Luckily he is stationed in Hawaii until June which is then when he will be on his ship. I will get to see him once before he gets deployed and then after, so it is about twice a year. That seems like FOREVER! Him leaving is just about a day old for me now, so I am still dealing with the initial overthinking and what not. I just have to believe he will stay loyal! I cannot wait to visit hawaii though like how awesome! How does everyone manage to keep conversations exciting, and keep the relationship engaging?? Thanks!

I think a first extended separation in any relationship is bound to cause a bit of anxiety for anyone. Is there any specific reason you're concerned about his fidelity (ie, past trust incidents between you two), or is this just a general worry for you?

[Jones5]

Yeah, Japan is a far distance. DG is from japan with parents originating from Osaka before they moved to the states. Every time we travel out of the states. I have to remind her of our bond through her parents and siblings. Usually, parents make the difference in long distance relationships. Her sister usually gives good advice when either of us is in town or out traveling. She has helped me a few times in tough situations.