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Thread: Having a tough time with distance

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    #1

    Having a tough time with distance

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    My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year now. He has been a member of the U.S. Air Force since we started dating. We're in a very serious and committed relationship. I knew that dating a man in the military would be tough. He's come home a few times since enlisting. He was home for leave for the past two weeks and left to return to his base earlier this week. For some reason, this time has been a lot harder on me. I have been crying for the past 3 days and can't get myself to do much at all. Every other time he's left, I was upset but it has never been this bad. Is anyone out there going through something similar or have you ever been in my position? Does it ever get easier? Either way, I'm completely in love with him and we are going to make it work regardless, it just gets tough sometimes. I feel like a part of me is missing. I don't know what to do with myself because all I can get myself to do is cry. Any advice or stories of similar situations would be greatly appreciated.
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    hey! I'm so sorry that this time has been harder on you. Us military girlfriends have to stick together. My boyfriend is leaving next week and I am terrified for how I'll be able to handle it. Especially since no one else understands what it's like. I'd love it if you messaged me !
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    Hey Mackenzie,

    Thank you for being so honest in your post. This may sound weird but it was very reassuring to know that you are going through similar experiences and have similar reactions to it. You are right, this lifestyle is extremely difficult. I think you mentioned an important piece in your post though, that you are completely in love with him and you both are going to make it work regardless. I honestly think that that mindset or perspective is just about the only way you will float with this lifestyle rather than sink. It takes a serious level of commitment by two people the are willing to go through these difficult times of separation and sometimes even conflict at a distance. It can get frustrating and feel very isolating. The good news is that by your post it sounds like you and your partner have that level of commitment, that I am so grateful for. My boyfriend and I always take that same mentality to get us through. "No matter what... we will get through this." I just want you to know that you are not alone, and that I completely understand where you are coming from. I hope that the past few months have been treating you better. I hope that you have reached out for social support from friends and family members and are doing things that you enjoy. All of the best
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    #4
    I agree that it is reassuring to hear someone who is going through the same experience. My Airman and I are 2000 miles apart and I have only been able to see him twice since we have been back together. The first time I cried the whole plane ride home and then for a good two days after. The second was when he came home on leave for my birthday and he had to actually leave early and before my birthday. I still cried for a few days. He always is strong and reminds me though that we can get through this and reminds me that I need to find support which is what I did by joining here. And it looks like you did as well. Feel free to message me. I am new to this forum and am still looking for support
    Just remember no matter what we are strong and we can get through this. We will be reunited with them again
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    #5
    Quote Originally Posted by mackenziepalma View Post
    My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year now. He has been a member of the U.S. Air Force since we started dating. We're in a very serious and committed relationship. I knew that dating a man in the military would be tough. He's come home a few times since enlisting. He was home for leave for the past two weeks and left to return to his base earlier this week. For some reason, this time has been a lot harder on me. I have been crying for the past 3 days and can't get myself to do much at all. Every other time he's left, I was upset but it has never been this bad. Is anyone out there going through something similar or have you ever been in my position? Does it ever get easier? Either way, I'm completely in love with him and we are going to make it work regardless, it just gets tough sometimes. I feel like a part of me is missing. I don't know what to do with myself because all I can get myself to do is cry. Any advice or stories of similar situations would be greatly appreciated.
    I went through the exact same thing, Mackenzie! My DB is navy though. It will get easier. The way I picked myself up was by starting a schedule. Get up at a certain time, make your bed then do a work out or go to work and go to sleep at the same time every night. Try to find new things to do. Find some kind of new hobbies. Honestly, it comes in stages too. One day you could be in tears and be extremely happy the next. Maybe that's just me??

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