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Thread: Complicated Love

  1. Fresh Newbie
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    #1

    Complicated Love

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    Hello Everyone

    I would try to make this short as possible, quick history i met my solider 10 months ago on a dating website, we went on a few dates hung out hit it off really well, but for some reason he had this laid back reserve demeanor that sometimes confused me. I was not sure if he liked me as friend or romantically.

    As the months went by i kind of got the vibe he just liked me as a friend so i removed the idea from my mind of being romantically involved with him. So we became really close friends and i started dating someone else and so did he. Things did not work out with his love interest and the same with me, so now 7 months into our friendship we got intimate and it was so weird there was not much affection involved.
    Later on we talk about it and we continue sleeping together for 3 months a lot of affection, cuddling & kissing was involved i stay the night by him a lot , he keeps in touch with me everyday we talk for hours everyday about everything.

    We do everything couples do just without the title So now he deployed been away a little over a week and we are even closer we keep in touch everyday multiple times a day just the same as when he was here. He's now opening up and expressing some feelings for me now and calling me nick names but he not saying if im his girlfiriend offically. I am very excited about this but a bit reluctant because im not sure what we are or where this is leading. Iam scared to mess things up especially now that he is deployed and ask him what we are and what are the expectations of us. Are we official, is he expecting me to wait for his return not that its a problem cause i have grown to fall in love with him. Im falling in love deeper and deeper by the day and not sure if this is the right time to bring this up or not since now that he just opening up
    He a bit reserved, move slow and i know he likes me and finds me attractive he tells me everyday but I m not sure where i stand and if i should wait for him to bring it up or have this conversation when he returns in 9 months

    Thank you any advice will be appreciated
  2. Senior Member
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    #2
    So you are falling in love with him but afraid to ask him if he considers you his girlfriend? I think this is something you need to talk with him about. Why wait 9 months to find out you are expecting different things?
  3. Senior Member
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    #3
    It sounds like an open conversation about expectations and labels on your relationship could answer your questions. Are you willing to date him long distance? Can you handle this lifestyle? Do you want to build a relationship via long distance and continue when he comes home? There are some questions to ask yourself as well.
  4. Senior Member
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    #4
    If you're not comfortable with outright having the conversation, just put that you're in a relationship with him on Facebook...he'll have to approve it (or deny)...then you'll know!

    I mean...that's what I did when I wasn't 100% sure...now we're married.
  5. OG Member
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    #5
    If you've seen each other naked you have the right to ask if you're exclusive, just don't come at it from the perspective of, "You need to commit" just ask him what the expectations are from both sides and if you have a title.


  6. Senior Member
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    #6
    Time for that open/ honest conversation.... obviously there must be some feelings involved here - why not ask the hard questions?
  7. Senior Member
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    #7
    Quote Originally Posted by April Lynne View Post
    If you've seen each other naked you have the right to ask if you're exclusive, just don't come at it from the perspective of, "You need to commit" just ask him what the expectations are from both sides and if you have a title.


    Quote Originally Posted by kw1214 View Post
    Time for that open/ honest conversation.... obviously there must be some feelings involved here - why not ask the hard questions?
    Totally agree with both of these ... don't come at him with an attitude but you have a right to know his thoughts.
  8. Old Newbie
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    #8
    Totally agree with all these! It's time to talk about what your expectations are of each other. Don't be afraid to ask him girl. It sounds like he is really into you so I can't imagine that conversation being anything but good! Make it happen!

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