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Thread: Trouble in Paradise

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    #1

    Shock Trouble in Paradise

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    Hey everyone! So things have never been better with DB. I love him to death and just got back home from his Air Force BMT graduation. We had an amazing time and even went ring shopping! It was magical! I cannot tell you how happy and lucky I am to have him. He is my best friend and I never get tired of being with him. I love him more and more each day even after 5 years.

    So whats the trouble? I was so happy at graduation but seeing him in camo's and his blues... it really hit me. I could lose the man I love so much and our fairy tale love would be cut short; no marriage, no house, no babies. I am genuinely terrified. I love him so much that it really scares me...if I lose him, I know I will never love like this again... does anyone relate to me or am I crazy???? Does anyone have any advice?

    Thanks for your continued support, y'all are amazing
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    What do you mean? Lose him as in he could deploy and get killed? You do realize he could get killed getting in his car, walking down the street, etc. there is never a "guarantee" you get your fairy tale, no matter what your spouse does for a living.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Allybeth View Post
    What do you mean? Lose him as in he could deploy and get killed? You do realize he could get killed getting in his car, walking down the street, etc. there is never a "guarantee" you get your fairy tale, no matter what your spouse does for a living.
    Exactly. I don't want him to get killed...I know there is always a risk in life, I have just never been scared until now because lets face it, military members have a greater risk of dying. I have an anxiety disorder and that could be a part of it, I just have such a strong fear of losing him and it sucks. Whatever situation we are in though, I am behind him 100%..
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    Quote Originally Posted by AirgirlBay View Post
    Exactly. I don't want him to get killed...I know there is always a risk in life, I have just never been scared until now because lets face it, military members have a greater risk of dying. I have an anxiety disorder and that could be a part of it, I just have such a strong fear of losing him and it sucks. Whatever situation we are in though, I am behind him 100%..
    Are you in counseling for your anxiety? If so, I would suggest talking about your fears with your counselor. It's going to drive you insane if you have this mindset being in a military relationship. Especially if you feel like this now, when there is no talk of deployment just yet.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Allybeth View Post
    Are you in counseling for your anxiety? If so, I would suggest talking about your fears with your counselor. It's going to drive you insane if you have this mindset being in a military relationship. Especially if you feel like this now, when there is no talk of deployment just yet.
    Yes I have and I take a SSRI medication which helps a lot. I think it may just be because I had to say goodbye to him yesterday and I may just be hurting and worried because of that. At least thats what I am hoping, I am just going to wait it out and pray that I can relax and trust.
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    You can't think about that stuff. Enjoy the present; don't worry about things that haven't happened.

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    Quote Originally Posted by the_lepus View Post
    You can't think about that stuff. Enjoy the present; don't worry about things that haven't happened.
    Thank you!
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    #8
    You guys have been together for 5 years and, while he has been at BMT, you saw him in that uniform for the first time and that made it "real." It sounds like that brought new emotions to the surface. I understand the anxiety piece-definitely talk about it because it may be a common thread in your relationship but also give yourself some time to calm. It is a new realization for you-time and sleep may help you come to terms to settle in with it! Be strong!!
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    Military members don't have a greater risk of dying. You're more likely to die in a car accident than in battle. You just can't live your life dwelling on the risks of losing someone. If that were the case, we would have to pass on every chance at love, whomever it was with. It is better to have loved and lost and all that jazz.
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by mlc311 View Post
    You guys have been together for 5 years and, while he has been at BMT, you saw him in that uniform for the first time and that made it "real." It sounds like that brought new emotions to the surface. I understand the anxiety piece-definitely talk about it because it may be a common thread in your relationship but also give yourself some time to calm. It is a new realization for you-time and sleep may help you come to terms to settle in with it! Be strong!!

    Thank you, you dont know how much I needed to hear this!
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