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Thread: New to being a Navy Girlfriend and Having a difficult time keeping it together

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    #1

    New to being a Navy Girlfriend and Having a difficult time keeping it together

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    Hi,

    My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 months. He's been enlisted in the Navy for two years maybe a bit longer. He got discharged from working on submarines, because of medical reasons but is now being re-stationed somewhere else. California, Japan, Florida, and Virginia are all options he says. He's at the base in CT where I live and go to college. I'm a sophomore. I've been a mess and don't know how I can handle the distance since I have never dated someone committed to the Navy/Military in any way. How do you make the pain of losing someone you fell in love with so quickly and jump into a long distance relationship bearable? I've cried daily for the last two weeks since he first told me he was being relocated. I'm also scared that now he will receive a job that he could be deployed in. I'm constantly anxious and trying to hold it together, and I'm sure making a decision on a job is just as difficult and stressful for him also. I just don't know how to deal with this pain of being distant for so long. He still has at least 3 years of enlistment and I'm not sure if he wants to reenlist. Everything is so unpredictable. If anyone could show me so support or help I could use as much as possible. Everyday eats away at me more and more not knowing when he could be leaving.
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    #2


    I don't have much advice on LDR but I would recommend just getting into a routine and communicating as much as is possible. With a new job yes he could deploy, but he could've done that on a submarine too...it's part of his job and if you love him unfortunately its something you'll have to deal with.
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    I'm a nursing student and decided to do college and 5 years instead of 4. I believe that my SO will be done with his enlistment at the same time graduating. 3 years though just seems so long to have to be long distance for until I have my BSN and can move wherever he is. I don't know how to cope with it, but trying to create a structured routine daily like you said would definitely help. Do you have any idea as to whether the navy/military in general allows for the possession of a personal laptop for Skype or communication?
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    #4
    Quote Originally Posted by akorik View Post
    I'm a nursing student and decided to do college and 5 years instead of 4. I believe that my SO will be done with his enlistment at the same time graduating. 3 years though just seems so long to have to be long distance for until I have my BSN and can move wherever he is. I don't know how to cope with it, but trying to create a structured routine daily like you said would definitely help. Do you have any idea as to whether the navy/military in general allows for the possession of a personal laptop for Skype or communication?
    If he's just stationed somewhere he def should be able to hap a laptop/ cell phone etc. If he's in training or deployed those might not be working or available but being stationed somewhere he can still have anything he could have before. What rank is he? if he can live of base you should easily be able to visit and even on base you should be able to just might need a hotel...not sure of rules with that since DB is a second class so he lives in an apt off base.

    I would stay focused on school, maybe volunteer at a hospital or something in your spare time if you have too much and just make friends. Live your life just like you would if he were there; college is a great experience so let yourself experience it.
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    #5

    Navy girlfriend in need of emotional support desperately

    Hi,

    My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 months. He's been enlisted in the Navy for two years maybe a bit longer. He got discharged from working on submarines, because of medical reasons but is now being re-stationed somewhere else. California, Japan, Florida, and Virginia are all options he says. He's at the base in CT where I live and go to college. I'm a sophomore. I've been a mess and don't know how I can handle the distance since I have never dated someone committed to the Navy/Military in any way. How do you make the pain of losing someone you fell in love with so quickly and jump into a long distance relationship bearable? I've cried daily for the last two weeks since he first told me he was being relocated. I'm also scared that now he will receive a job that he could be deployed in. I'm constantly anxious and trying to hold it together, and I'm sure making a decision on a job is just as difficult and stressful for him also. I just don't know how to deal with this pain of being distant for so long. He still has at least 3 years of enlistment and I'm not sure if he wants to reenlist. Everything is so unpredictable. If anyone could show me so support or help I could use as much as possible. Everyday eats away at me more and more not knowing when he could be leaving.
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    #6
    just FYI its against TOS to post the same thread in 2 different sections
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    #7
    Thank you for taking the time to talk to me, it means a lot. I don't know what rank he is, I will be seeing him this weekend to try and sort some of the questions I have out with him. I'm extremely new to the entire Navy environment and feel like I don't even have a basic knowledge of the rules and structure of the Navy. I've been researching trying to become more educated on his world that he is apart of everyday. I'm trying to be as patient as possible since I know that I have no control over anything the Navy has in store for him.
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    #8
    Oops sorry I didn't know! How do I take this down?
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    #9
    Quote Originally Posted by akorik View Post
    Oops sorry I didn't know! How do I take this down?
    a moderator will merge it not a big deal you didn't know
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    #10
    Quote Originally Posted by akorik View Post
    Thank you for taking the time to talk to me, it means a lot. I don't know what rank he is, I will be seeing him this weekend to try and sort some of the questions I have out with him. I'm extremely new to the entire Navy environment and feel like I don't even have a basic knowledge of the rules and structure of the Navy. I've been researching trying to become more educated on his world that he is apart of everyday. I'm trying to be as patient as possible since I know that I have no control over anything the Navy has in store for him.
    I would def recommend sitting down and taking to him about expectations and realities and what you should expect. Like if you expect to Skype daily and to him that's just too much y'all should talk about it before hand so no one gets upset.

    as for not understanding or knowing much about the Navy I think that's ok, we all have been there or are still there. I still know very little of how the Navy works because for DB and I our relationship is literally the exact same as if he were just another government employee in DC...now next year when he's on sea duty that will completely change I'm sure...but its something I will have to learn as we go. And FYI this site is great for learning the little nuances of the military. I was even asking last night about a term that I didn't understand and even after googling I found the definitions I found very vague...the women here are great and can explain most things very well.
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