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Thread: I'm new here :) & he won't communicate.

  1. Fresh Newbie
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    #1

    Confused I'm new here :) & he won't communicate.

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    Hey everyone!,
    I'm new here and honestly I joined because I'm not sure if anyone is going through what I am and I don't want to feel alone. So me and my boyfriend started talking early October and we didn't make it official until December. Keep in mind we have known each other since 2011 just never really spoke. He reached out to me and at the time i lived 1 1/2 hours away so I would always go see him on weekends when I wasn't at school (he doesn't have a car).He's stationed in San Diego in case you were wondering. It's been great, so far and he's always including me in his future plans like moving in together, kids, getting a dog, etc. & I'm like OMG that's so cute. But i'm trying not to think much of it either and get all in my feelings about it. But I had to move out of state so i'm no longer in California (I live 5 hours away). As soon as i found out i was so sad because i knew i wouldn't be able to see him as often. So I let him know right away what happened. I told him I'm giving you the option to leave right now or we can try and work it out. He chose to stay and work with the distance until he gets back (He's getting deployed in a couple months).

    Now this is my question

    He recently was sent out to sea and he told me he wasn't going to be able to talk to me much while he was out (For a week) . I'm totally fine with that because i get it he has shit to do i don't want to get in the way of that. I just said i'll miss you call me as soon as you get back so i know you're safe..
    & I know that when he has time to talk/text with me he does text me throughout the day. But he has not even been communicating with me at all! like i know he came back a couple days ago. But i text him once and he didn't even respond and i'm like ok cool. Then he answered we talked very little. I just feel worried because i don't know whats going on with him. I just want him to tell me "hey i can't talk but when i can i will give you a call" but i'm not even getting that. suggestions? lol anyone been through this?
  2. Senior Member
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    #2
    Quote Originally Posted by soleil View Post
    Hey everyone!,
    I'm new here and honestly I joined because I'm not sure if anyone is going through what I am and I don't want to feel alone. So me and my boyfriend started talking early October and we didn't make it official until December. Keep in mind we have known each other since 2011 just never really spoke. He reached out to me and at the time i lived 1 1/2 hours away so I would always go see him on weekends when I wasn't at school (he doesn't have a car).He's stationed in San Diego in case you were wondering. It's been great, so far and he's always including me in his future plans like moving in together, kids, getting a dog, etc. & I'm like OMG that's so cute. But i'm trying not to think much of it either and get all in my feelings about it. But I had to move out of state so i'm no longer in California (I live 5 hours away). As soon as i found out i was so sad because i knew i wouldn't be able to see him as often. So I let him know right away what happened. I told him I'm giving you the option to leave right now or we can try and work it out. He chose to stay and work with the distance until he gets back (He's getting deployed in a couple months).

    Now this is my question

    He recently was sent out to sea and he told me he wasn't going to be able to talk to me much while he was out (For a week) . I'm totally fine with that because i get it he has shit to do i don't want to get in the way of that. I just said i'll miss you call me as soon as you get back so i know you're safe..
    & I know that when he has time to talk/text with me he does text me throughout the day. But he has not even been communicating with me at all! like i know he came back a couple days ago. But i text him once and he didn't even respond and i'm like ok cool. Then he answered we talked very little. I just feel worried because i don't know whats going on with him. I just want him to tell me "hey i can't talk but when i can i will give you a call" but i'm not even getting that. suggestions? lol anyone been through this?
    Welcome to the forum!

    Just a few questions... how did you find out he was back? Also, have you told him your feelings about this?
  3. Fresh Newbie
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    Thank you!!

    Because he had told me he was coming back the day before Valentines Day. I'm also friends on FB with his coworker's wife and she would post updates throughout the week. & no not yet I will though as soon as i can get a phone call with him or something like i said he's not even texting me back.
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    Quote Originally Posted by soleil View Post
    Thank you!!

    Because he had told me he was coming back the day before Valentines Day. I'm also friends on FB with his coworker's wife and she would post updates throughout the week. & no not yet I will though as soon as i can get a phone call with him or something like i said he's not even texting me back.
    Hmm. That is strange. Can you call him? Do you have access to his email or a Facebook message? Text messages don't give you much room to get your feelings out. Maybe send him a message letting him know your feelings. If you are in a serious relationship you should have open communication.
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    I will definitely be giving him a call and just asking what is going on letting him know how i feel because i know thats how ill get my answers. I hate confrontation though D: Let's hope he answers LOL thanks for your response littlemissred
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    #6
    Quote Originally Posted by soleil View Post
    I will definitely be giving him a call and just asking what is going on letting him know how i feel because i know thats how ill get my answers. I hate confrontation though D: Let's hope he answers LOL thanks for your response littlemissred
    Of course! Just make sure you aren't going into the conversation expecting confrontation. It sounds like you are ready for things to get heated. Good luck!!!
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    #7
    Gurl I've found other stuff out that i'm trying to look past. But yeah i am in no way trying to be difficult about it just want to know whats up. and thanks i'll need it.

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