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Thread: Dealing with my boyfired leaving for the first time

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    #1

    Dealing with my boyfired leaving for the first time

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    My boyfriend of a year and a half is now being re-assigned and has a few options which most of them overseas except one. I am an emotional wreck. I see this man in my life forever and I don't want what we have going on to end. I want to sit him down and basically tell him how I feel and get an understanding on where we stand as a relationship, but I don't want him to feel like I am pressuring him to jump and marry me. Am I wrong?
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    #2

    Smile Stay Strong!

    I met my BF while he was stationed at Ft. Benning, GA. From the day we met I knew we were meant for each other. He got his orders in May and he found out he was being stationed in Italy. It was such a shock to me and when he told me that i felt my heart drop. I was so scared to have to go through that kind of distance. He will be stationed there for the remainder of his contract… which is well over two years.

    All you can do is stay positive for your BF. You don't want him to feel like you can't handle a long distance relationship. Don't think of the negative think of the positive. Just talk to your BF about everything. I'm sure he will understand and listen to everything you have to say.

    If you want to take the next step in your relationship like engagement or marriage, I don't think you are moving too fast. Me and my BF have been dating for 9 months and we want to get engaged when he comes home in several months from now. I feel like everyone is different. Some people date for 8 years before marriage and some people date 6 months. When you know you know. Just follow your heart.
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    #3
    Why does him being stationed over seas mean your relationship has to end? There are plenty of women who deal with their SO being stationed half way around the world. It's hard, obviously, but it's not something that should cause a break up, unless there are underlying issues, IMO. If you and him are committed to one another, even if you are "just" boyfriend and girlfriend, it shouldn't matter where he is stationed.

    be cool.
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    #4


    I can only imagine how anxious it might be to wait for news like that. I really think that your best bet is to not worry about it until he learns what his new duty station will actually be. Then you can think about the next step. IMO, the military is a fickle machine and just because he has "options" that are mostly overseas, doesn't mean he'll actually end up overseas. I think that pressuring him at this point to marry you just because he *might* get orders overseas isn't the right direction.

    Also, like Ashley said, if he does get stationed overseas, that does not necessarily mean that your relationship is over. You can discuss this with him without even bringing up marriage. You've been together for a year and a half. When he received his options, did he discuss with you which one he should take?
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    #5
    First off Thank You for all your response. I didn't think I would get any response. MissNik. We have discussed his options. He said he will take Virginia so we can be closer. I am going to have a little more serious talk with him tonight because he has to make his decision by tomorrow Friday. I won't even bring up the marriage thing. I am not in a rush. I am just nervous with this whole long distance thing. I have never tried it. We have a wonderful relationship and communicate really well. He is the one telling me not to worry. But at the end of the day I AM WORRIED :-(

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