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Thread: losing strength

  1. Fresh Newbie
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    #1

    Bang Head losing strength

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    hi im 19 and in college in GA and my Navy boyfriend is in Virginia. we havent seen each other in a year but he'll be home in November but we recently got into an argument and now our communication is horrible. we're both Leos so our pride definitely gets in the way. when ever we get into an argument he likes to make jokes of the situation and just act like nothing ever happened and move on meanwhile im still stuck and a little frustrated with the situation. usually i never say anything about it and just move on with him but this i couldn't do it and now he's kinda annoyed because i keep bringing it up. im losing patience and strength, this distance is really getting to us.
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    #2
    Can you go and visit eachother? DH and I are doing long distance right now since hes in VA at school, he visits on occasion and it seems to help tremendously.
  3. Senior Member
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    #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Pocahontas95 View Post
    hi im 19 and in college in GA and my Navy boyfriend is in Virginia. we havent seen each other in a year but he'll be home in November but we recently got into an argument and now our communication is horrible. we're both Leos so our pride definitely gets in the way. when ever we get into an argument he likes to make jokes of the situation and just act like nothing ever happened and move on meanwhile im still stuck and a little frustrated with the situation. usually i never say anything about it and just move on with him but this i couldn't do it and now he's kinda annoyed because i keep bringing it up. im losing patience and strength, this distance is really getting to us.
    Communication definitely isn't an easy thing in a LDR when you're accustomed to "regular" communication. When DH and I were long distance, we had our arguments. And he and I are a lot alike in that we're stubborn and we like to have the last word. But our marriage is more important, to the both of us, than being right. We would say our piece and, yes, sometimes we would have to get off Skype or off the phone, and just stick to texting for the rest of the night. But we talked through the problem before going to sleep, because we try not to go to sleep angry. Now, we argue a little and make a joke about it and we both move on. An outsider, or a fly on the wall, would probably think we're absolutely insane, but we aren't. Our relationship dynamic is just natural for us.

    If I stayed mad or upset with DH at every little thing he did that annoyed me or pissed me off, he and I would be miserably married or divorced. Long distance is not easy and it is not for the weak. It brings out the best or worst in both people in the relationship. From what you described, OP, it sounds like your boyfriend is over the fight, but you're not. From what I've read, it sounds to me like you've got two options: Maybe you should try communicating with him? (tell him how YOU feel, why YOU feel that way, but don't accuse him of making you feel that way -- that will only annoy him and make him more inclined to hear what he wants to hear and not listen to the actual words coming out of your mouth.) Or learn to pick and choose your battles?

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    #4

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    thanks, i told him how i felt and now we're good. he was very understanding
  5. I miss Target & Trader Joe's, open roads & the smell of home
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    #5
    I'm sorry you're having such a hard time, but welcome to the site. You go to college in my hometown
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    #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Pocahontas95 View Post
    thanks, i told him how i felt and now we're good. he was very understanding
    That's great to hear! I'm glad everything worked out

  7. we were all rooting for you
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    #7
    Glad things are working out for you, OP.

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